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Old 12-26-2012, 05:01 PM   #1
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Question Does my dd have a form of autism?

Let me start with this, I don't have really any experience with autism and I have no idea if what I'm feeling is correct. My dd is 4yrs old she will be 5 in April. She has some things that seem "different" so to speak to my other children and any child I've ever really known. My dh doesn't like when I talk about it and he is not open to this at all. He is afraid that "labeling" her might effect her in life as far as education and emotional development and feels that she is just perfect and fine.

These are the things that make me wonder if she has some form of high functioning autism.
-When she is excited she puts her hands up in the air and does this hand and finger thing. Its hard to explain but it's like a dancing hands and fingers movement. Many family members have pointed it out saying it's cute because you know when she is happy. She started doing this around her 3rd bday and still does it. I feel like she doesn't even notice it happening either.
-She is very very sensitive and emotional and will cry very easily. She gets her feelings hurt very easily.
-She doesn't like to wear clothing very much and takes everything but her panties off the moment we are home. She says they don't feel good on her.
-She LOVES to draw and color. And she is amazing at it. I mean very detailed and very colorful. She will sit for hours doing this.
-When she was a baby she never really wanted to make eye contact with anyone else and didn't like anyone else including her dad. She would cry and cry until she could be with me again and she would nurse for hours at a time.
-She plays well for the most part with her sister(6yrs) and brother(almost 2yrs) but when it comes to other children she would rather be alone.

Please tell me what your thoughts are. This is a sensitive subject for me but I need to talk about it. I've been holding this in for some time. Thank you for your help.

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Old 12-26-2012, 05:08 PM   #2
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Re: Does my dd have a form of autism?

Have you looked up sensory processing disorder? From the description above, that seems more likely. But I am no where near a doctor. Just something to look up.
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Old 12-26-2012, 05:10 PM   #3
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Have you looked up sensory processing disorder? From the description above, that seems more likely. But I am no where near a doctor. Just something to look up.
I will look it up right now.
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Old 12-26-2012, 05:11 PM   #4
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Re: Does my dd have a form of autism?

The only thing that could maaaybe make me think that it's possible is the fact that you have a "feeling". (that and the no eye contact)

My daughter would not ever wear clothes. When she did they had to be soft, and super comfey. She is just fussy about clothes and sheets and blankets. But, she shows no signs of even having a sensory disorder.

She wouldn't color for hours, but she'd paint or craft for hours. Even by age four, she would do paint on pottery for a full day at one time. One time, my mom and I tag teamed at the pottery place because she was there for about five hours working on one project.

She also "hopped" when she was excited. Just tiny little jumps up and down. Not just for a few seconds...for a long time. Hopping on two feet. That became a habit for her because she had broken her leg as a new walker and learned to bounce around instead of walking.

She's 20 years old now, and a geek (loves Harry Potter and Dr Who, math and science) but, she's never had any problems or reason for me or anyone to think she had any special issues. She learned easily, so she had little patience for those who didn't....but, otherwise, she did O.K socially too. (just not always a very reasonable person)

Kids are quirky. People are quirky. I just try to respect the quirks, while being watchful of something more than just a typical quirk.
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Old 12-26-2012, 05:13 PM   #5
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Re: Does my dd have a form of autism?

Could be. But as a mom who has two with a diagnosis of autism, I can tell you a diagnosis changes nothing. There have been many days I wish I had just skipped the whole thing. My children are who they are and that label changes nothing and the "help" we have received was only somewhat helpful. There were a few great things I learned, but lots of things I put my children though that I wish I hadn't. So im just saying that to let you know labeling doesn't change things for the better.
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Old 12-26-2012, 05:15 PM   #6
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It's far far too hard to say. It's much more complicated than a checklist from the internet, KWIM? Does she exhibit behaviors that point towards Autism? Yes. But they could point to other things, like sensory issues. If you are truly concerned I would suggest an evaluation. You can either get one privately through a developmental pediatrician or neuropsychologist, or contact your local school district. They have preschool programs and will evaluate for free based on parent referrals. If you really want to investigate Autism specifically you probably want your evaluation to include an ADOS (Autism Diagnostic Observation Scale I think). I also recommend an evaluation by an Occupational Therapist (OT) to explore sensory concerns.

It could all potentially fall within the normal range, too. If it's setting off your radar I always say get testing
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Old 12-26-2012, 05:20 PM   #7
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Originally Posted by marliah
Could be. But as a mom who has two with a diagnosis of autism, I can tell you a diagnosis changes nothing. There have been many days I wish I had just skipped the whole thing. My children are who they are and that label changes nothing and the "help" we have received was only somewhat helpful. There were a few great things I learned, but lots of things I put my children though that I wish I hadn't. So im just saying that to let you know labeling doesn't change things for the better.
For us a label has helped immensely. Now my daughter gets the help she needs. It also helps me in caring for her needs appropriately.


How does she play with toys? Does she play with them properly?

Girls with autism tend to be very literal when playing with toys (no imagination, but real life situations). My dd lines up her toys, organizes them by color, or what they are wearing etc. my dd would rather watch tv on a loop than play with siblings or other kids. She does not interact with other kids and just this week started speaking to few others outside of family.

Look up Dr. Baron Cohen and his theory on girls with autism. It was enlightening for me.

I say it can't hurt to have an evaluation done and get services if she needs them.
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Old 12-26-2012, 05:28 PM   #8
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It's such a hard situation. My dh is not on board with it and doesn't want to have her evaluated but tells me to do what I want. I don't want to upset my dh but I feel that I wouldn't be a good mother if i just ignore my instincts.

Most people wouldn't even think twice either if you met her. She seems normal to most. But I'm with her all day everyday so I notice the differences.
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Old 12-26-2012, 05:35 PM   #9
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Re: Does my dd have a form of autism?

I don't like labels. And I agree its hard to say. My girls can't sit still & would rather go naked half the time but only inkling might be detailed drawings yet I know people...norm that are really good but not autistic. Sounds like really In general normal kid....

I don't think diagonsis will change much... meds or no meds for certain things.... & lots to deal with. If unbearable maybe look into but right now souns liveable. My toddler likes to maainnly play with sissy & could careless kids her age....
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Old 12-26-2012, 06:18 PM   #10
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Re: Does my dd have a form of autism?

I would not venture an opinion without ever having met or spent time with a child but I will say that you should follow your mama heart and seek an eval. with a developmental pediatrician. I also just want to offer and say that the issues you are dealing with regarding your husband is VERY common. Dads never want anything to be "wrong" that they can't fix. Women tend to function differently.

If you look to local children's hospitals you will find they have centers for develoment where you will get evaluations. You should know that it can take MANY months for you to be seen. This is standard all over the country because there are so few facilities for this type of concern. Get on the waiting list and tell them you will take cancelations if at all possible. In the interim you "could" contact your local public school system and refer her to have an evaluation through them. It will be free of charge, they cannot give an actual diagnosis but they could offer some information that you could use. IMO that would not replace an eval. at a developmental pedi. If you have any questions of I might be of some assistance please pm anytime.
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