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Old 01-28-2013, 06:43 PM   #1
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Gender Disappointment

We had our anatomy scan today and found out we are having a baby girl. We have two girls, 6 & 4, and one son who will be 2 in March. I was really, really hoping for another boy. Based on my pregnancy so far (morning sickness and baby's heart rate) I was convinced I was having another boy so it was a surprise to find out that I was not correct. I know I should be grateful to have a healthy baby (and I am!) but I am really struggling with the news. This is the first time I have dealt with this because I was really hoping for a girl first, then I was thrilled to have a sister for my DD, and thrilled again to be having a boy after two girls. The sane part of me knows these feeling will be resolved soon enough and once this baby girl joins our family I will never be able to imagine life differently. I guess I just need to get these feelings out. I am really glad that I know the gender and have a few months to adjust to everything. I feel like if I had waited to find out I would have had a hard time bonding at birth.


Loving wife to Erik - the man who drives me wild and drives me crazy .
Mother to Amelia (12.06), Charlotte (11.08), Clark (3.11), and Tabitha (6.13).
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Old 01-28-2013, 06:46 PM   #2
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(((Hugs))) I haven't personally dealt with this... But i fear it if we get pg again. It will be our last and I would love a little girl. I can only imagine the feelings...that said...I know you will love this sweet baby the moment you see her...and probably before.

Wife to Casey Mom to Isaac and Carson Hoping for someone new in 2014
Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.
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Old 01-28-2013, 06:50 PM   #3
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I'm sure you will get used to it but I understand. I have two girls and really don't want a boy if I have another lol. I just know if I get preggo again have one! I'd be ok with it but I'd have to adjust. Hugs!
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Old 01-28-2013, 06:51 PM   #4
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Re: Gender Disappointment

I feel your pain. We have three boys. This is our last baby. I won't be having anymore. It's another boy. We wanted a girl SO badly, and were even told it was a girl at our 17 week ultrasound. Unfortunately, the tech was wrong. He is very much a boy as we found out at our 20 week anatomy scan.

I haven't bought anything. Nothing. I love this boy with all of my heart. Feeling his little kicks makes me giggle. I talk to my stomach often, and really, really, really love this baby. I just can't seem to get excited like I was with the other three. I am like you, I know these feelings will go away when (if not before) he is born... and it will be like he was just supposed to be here... but I can't help wonder what my life would be like with a little pink in it.
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Old 01-28-2013, 07:17 PM   #5
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Re: Gender Disappointment

sorry, mama. i, too, dread that gender disappointment.

(also, congrats on the healthy pg/babe)
A (usually) happy wife mama to my BOGO girls, DD1 July 2010 and DD2 Dec 2011.
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Old 01-28-2013, 07:35 PM   #6
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Re: Gender Disappointment

I know the feeling, we were hoping for a girl this time around, but we are getting another boy. That will bring us up to three boys. However, the up side to this is that I do not have to go buy new baby clothes or anything like that I have pretty much everything I will need for another baby because we saved everything from the two older boys.
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Old 01-28-2013, 07:49 PM   #7
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I am pregnant with girl #3. We are probably done. I was devastated. I was sure it was a boy. I've always wanted both, all my friends got both. I literally cried the whole way home from the ultrasound. Of course, I'm grateful for a healthy baby. Now about 10 weeks later I'm more at peace with it, but I think a tiny part of me will hold out hope they were wrong until I see for myself at delivery .
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Old 01-28-2013, 07:52 PM   #8
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I'm with you mamas. When I found out #2 was another boy, I cried. Luckily the u/s tech thought they were tears of joy, otherwise I would have cried twice as much out of embarrassment! Now I'm really glad I have 2 boys, but I want a dd so bad, and i'm scared to try again and end up with another ds.
Wife to Nick since 7.2.05, Mom to Cameron Nicholas since 10.16.06 & Dominic Adam 4.7.09 and Lucius Robert 10.2.14
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Old 01-28-2013, 08:06 PM   #9
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Re: Gender Disappointment

i had that with my 4th child. I really wanted a girl vs a boy and I was utterly depressed over it. (just being honest) it took me about 6 months AFTER his birth to completely fall in love. it was not easy, i found out what he was by accident and i wished I had just seen at birth... I think thats the issue w alot of gender disappointment. if you dont find out at 17-20 weeks, you will fall in love with whats kicking in your and the surprise at birth.
I did not find out what I was having w number 5 and I had to come to terms that I may be having a boy. I was forced to do that for 9 months. I did end up getting another girl on #5 and I honestly think it would have only stung a tad if it were a boy.

talk it thru. do whatever you can to heal and process it BY delivery. dont go into postpartum like me. far too many crying nights. it was senseless.
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Old 01-28-2013, 08:07 PM   #10
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Re: Gender Disappointment

My heart sunk when I found out #3 was another boy. Part of me was so ready to be done having children, but I know I won't be able to resist trying at least once more for a baby girl. I'm already anxious about "what if I have another boy after this?!?!?!" It took about 2 weeks but I'm really very excited about Henry (boy #3). My grandma said to me, "You're so lucky, not just anyone gets to have 3 boys and your boys are going to have 2 brothers each!"

So in the spirit of my wise old grandma and thinking about your DS; Not just any little boy gets to have 3 sisters.
Mae- Mama to Gustavo 10/07, Joey 12/10 and Henry 5/13
“No matter how big the lie; repeat it often enough and the masses will regard it as the truth.” ― John F. Kennedy
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