Deciding not to breast feed in advancei

[kattayanna_mom]

Originally Posted by crunch!910 I lose respect for anyone that doesn't even try to breastfeed. It doesn't necessarily make them a bad mother, but it does make them a mother that could have chosen the best for their child, but instead chose an inferior method of feeding. And that is just something I cannot understand when I work so incredibly hard and strive every day to do what is best for my children - not to mention overcame so many obstacles to be able to still be breastfeeding my current 9 month old. But, I've also failed to breastfeed a child despite my efforts. Part of it was out of my control, part of it was a lack of support and education, so I feel for mothers that tried and just didn't have enough support or truly are not able to. All that said, I try my best to advocate and be a supportive person that helps others with breastfeeding, but don't belittle anyone that still chooses formula. In the end, I try to be compassionate. http://www.thealphaparent.com/2011/1...aby-is-my.html

I don't loose respect for them I just feel sad for both mom and baby but as for the rest if your post I could have almost written it.

[kattayanna_mom]

Originally Posted by umphreysmommy Yes!! I would like to say this by a million. Maybe on crunchy message boards and at LLL meetings do formula feeding moms get slammed or they feel guilty but in real life I have found the opposite to be true. Even people who "support" breastfeeding have told me to just give a bottle so we can go out to the bar or leave baby with grandma. Don't even get me started on breastfeeding past 6 months and the when are you weaning question. In my area in mainstream society formula feeding is the standard and more people talk down to you for being an attached parent and breastfeeding. The only place I see formula slammed is online.

This has been my experience as well.

[JustSomeChickVee]

Originally Posted by DalesWidda I agree with you. And I am guilty of feeding processed food. I am totally working on it. I just don't understand why people don't TRY. I get it that there are issues. I had major issues and I ended up supplementing. I didn't know anything about homemade formula so I supplemented with donor milk and formula. But I never gave up. I don't know. There are so many things in life that are difficult when it comes to raising children. We all have to sacrifice. I don't know why people don't "sacrifice" a little to give breastmilk IF POSSIBLE. Obviously there are people who really really can't but there are people who just don't try. That is hard for me to understand. I actually wrote a paper for my environmental science class on the hazards of artificial infant feeding. If anyone is interested in reading it pm me.

I sacrificed my mental health, bonding with my child, my physical health to a degree and my breasts which took $10,000 to fix and will always have some degree of scarring from my surgery.

After discussing it with DH, I won't be doing it again. I made my sacrifices, and it WASN'T worth it.

[JustSomeChickVee]

Originally Posted by Dory How do you build a very large stash and not pump at all for the entire first year? That doesn't even make sense. Donor milk? Buying milk? Because if you build a large stash of your breastmilk, you're pumping sometime in that first year! And never mind the fact that's reiterated over and over that NOT EVERYONE IS A SUFFICIENT PUMPER. I was a mediocre pumper when I went back to work, about 4oz in a 15 minute pumping, but there are others who can struggle and struggle to get one ounce combined. Not everyone is you.

some women hand express. I know a mama who can't pump almost anything but she can hand express a lot so when she uses a sitter or whatever, she hand expresses.

[sandhillcranes]

Originally Posted by JustSomeChickVee some women hand express. I know a mama who can't pump almost anything but she can hand express a lot so when she uses a sitter or whatever, she hand expresses.

OT but I always thought it was interesting how well some can hand express. I tried hand expression many times with no success. I even youtubed how to do it lol. Nothing would come out..maybe some drops. I do think I have IGT after researching it but never looked into it sufficiently bc I am absolutely horrified by docs touching my breasts. I do not like for strangers to touch me (no mani/pedi's, no massages, ick!) so I just tried to work with what I had so to speak. At some point I decided I needed to put google down, yknow, for my own sanity

[JennTheMomma]

Originally Posted by sandhillcranes OT but I always thought it was interesting how well some can hand express. I tried hand expression many times with no success. I even youtubed how to do it lol. Nothing would come out..maybe some drops. I do think I have IGT after researching it but never looked into it sufficiently bc I am absolutely horrified by docs touching my breasts. I do not like for strangers to touch me (no mani/pedi's, no massages, ick!) so I just tried to work with what I had so to speak. At some point I decided I needed to put google down, yknow, for my own sanity

I have a friend who can hand express enough to feed her own child plus donate full time to another. I on the other hand can't hand express or pump more than .25 ounces in an entire day, but I can nurse exclusively. It is truly different for every woman. I am hoping this time around to be able to pump enough to donate (while I nurse my own exclusively). But we'll see.

[jam's mum]

Originally Posted by sandhillcranes OT but I always thought it was interesting how well some can hand express. I tried hand expression many times with no success. I even youtubed how to do it lol. Nothing would come out..maybe some drops. I do think I have IGT after researching it but never looked into it sufficiently bc I am absolutely horrified by docs touching my breasts. I do not like for strangers to touch me (no mani/pedi's, no massages, ick!) so I just tried to work with what I had so to speak. At some point I decided I needed to put google down, yknow, for my own sanity

I only hand expressed when I needed milk for Jammy. I had one of those manual pumps which was exhausting after a while, and hand expressing was easier to manage in the university bathrooms because my university (University of Chicago, in case anyone wants to go, don't) doesn't provide any breastfeeding facilities to its student parents.

[Hungry Caterpillar]

Originally Posted by jam's mum I only hand expressed when I needed milk for Jammy. I had one of those manual pumps which was exhausting after a while, and hand expressing was easier to manage in the university bathrooms because my university (University of Chicago, in case anyone wants to go, don't) doesn't provide any breastfeeding facilities to its student parents.

Don't you love how those who can make a difference seem to think this is a totally acceptable place to pump? Would they like their meals prepared in a public restroom?

[jam's mum]

Originally Posted by Hungry Caterpillar Don't you love how those who can make a difference seem to think this is a totally acceptable place to pump? Would they like their meals prepared in a public restroom?

Right?

And while I don't mind breastfeeding in public at all (although I know many other women who do), I really do draw the line at clamping a machine to, or rhythmically massaging, my breasts in front of other people.

[carriek38]

Originally Posted by jam's mum Right? And while I don't mind breastfeeding in public at all (although I know many other women who do), I really do draw the line at clamping a machine to, or rhythmically massaging, my breasts in front of other people.

Yeah, I don't think that would do much to combat the perceptions around bfing as weird or quasi-sexual. My goodness, just say it out loud, "rhythmically massaging my breasts." It sounds lewd.