Throwing an adoption 'shower' or party?

[amyltc]

My cousin just found out they are for sure going to adopt their foster dd!! I am so so excited for them! Their dd just turned 1. We didn't do a shower for them (they took her home from the hospital), its her first child. I'd like to throw her some sort of a shower or party or something. Is that weird? What do people usually do in these situations? I know I asked about this when they first got her way back when, but I can't find the thread.

[qsefthuko]

I haven't adopted nor do I know anyone who has but I personally think it is a great idea.

[Sarah-B]

My friends just adopted from the hospital and they had a shower before she came home.

You could throw a forever family party and be sure to out in parenthesis on the invite that it is like a baby shower but the baby is age one. And have your cousin register for things her dd needs.

[amyltc]

OK, so should I call it an adoption shower? Everyone that would be invited knows the situation already. I guess we could do the option for either her college fund (they did that for her birthday) or gifts for the baby/things they need (I mean they still need diapers and stuff, they don't CD). I guess just do it like an open house? Maybe just have food out and let people just come and mingle and open gifts? I'm terrible at planning things like this, but I also think that I really want to be the one to do this for her. I think I 'get' at least somewhat what they've been through (years of infertility before this and we were trying to adopt for a while, though not through foster care).

[77Lipen]

Party is nice.

Think of things to commemorate the moment of adoption rather than traditional gifts of toys ect. They likely have all they need already in that regards since she's been living there for a while

Things as gifts
Professional photographer
Collage of memories pre adoption
'Adoption book' instead of baby book
Jewelry (they make adoption type stuff, or even mothers pride/charm bracelet) for both the child and parents.
A 'coming home' outfit
Memory box (to put things commemorating the day in... Like the coming home outfit... Lol

[77Lipen]

Me personally:

I'd throw a big BBQ and just have people over to celebrate. A photographer at the courthouse and everyone puts $ into that. And if do it as close to, if not on the day of adoption.

A friend of mine was adopting a baby and it took 4 yrs to be finalized through the state... And she took her home from the hospital and found out at 1 she was eligible for adoption. So... Sometimes things drag on... And on...

Throw the shower too early and something backfires(a family member appeals) and it'll be awful.

[Tabatha]

I definitely think you should have a party, I don't think it should be called a shower simply because she has already been living with them for so long I don't think that's the right term. But it'd be a nice little get together for the family and a good memory for the parents. My son was premature, and he ended up coming home right before my baby shower (not planned that way) but I kind of remember it as celebrating him coming home, even though no one else thought of it that way or mentioned it. I agree with PPs idea about the invitations and your sister registering. Either way congratulations to the parents, that is so exciting!

[newmommy13]

I love the term forever family party. Then its more like a celebration for them all rather than a baby shower because thats been done and they don't need things like you get at a baby shower, plus its more significant than just buying the baby a toy or diapers imo too. Maybe get the word out that you are taking a collection for a custom photographer if they would like to contribute or something?

[Msheidiann]

A celebration is absolutely a good idea!! I am not sure what to call it...once we finalize, we are throwing a party...I guess we are just calling it an adoption party. It will be an open house...come by for an appetizer and to say hi kind of thing. Love that you are doing this for your cousin!!! I would wait until the adoption is final though, just to be safe.

[newmommy13]

Oh yeah for sure wait until finalization.