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Old 02-06-2013, 03:50 AM   #1
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co sleeping night nursing not working any more wtd?

my 8 month old has slept with us in our bed since he was a few weeks old. at first i didnt want t oco sleep because mommy and daddy wanted some space somewhere. after seeing dh sleeping soundly through the night about a week after owen was born and always having to get up (walk a few feet) and go to the crib i got really tired of it. so i brought owen to bed with me and i loved the bonding it brought us. ever since lo was 3 months or so it has been an off and on nightmare.
the kicking the pulling the pinching the squirming the crying. dh is finishing school so its mainly just me 99.9 % of the time at night. we have a pack n play in our room that owen has slept in a handful of times. we tried letting owen cry for multiple nights and after only a few nights he would cry for 10 minutes then sleep. but he is always back up to nurse every 4 hours or less regardless of the method we use.

after a about a week of letting him fuss before he went down neither him nor i liked all the noise. he also had a 3 week teething bout for his first tooth where he was up crying and nursing every 30 minutes.

owen can fall alseep anywhere but staying asleep just isnt working

when owen goes down at night i will cuddle him on our bed and leave when he is asleep. i live with inlaws and im in our room at night. he seems to stir at every sound i make.

we also cant do a side car with our bed because its a (very comfy) pull out couch.

he has a nursery upstairs but im not ready to "cast" him away that far at night. i just want him to sleep through without having to nurse (3+ times) each night.

he has three full meals plus two or three snacks and about 4 nursings during the day then just nursing about 4 times at night.
what do we do?

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Old 02-06-2013, 05:41 AM   #2
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Re: co sleeping night nursing not working any more wtd?

This probably isn't what you want to hear but breastfed babies are meant to nurse during the night. Breastmilk digests quicker than formula and little nurslings need to replenish more often. I'm guessing no matter where you have Owen sleep he is still going to wake up to nurse. I really have no ideas because I am still cosleeping with my almost four year old (and nursing). I would just keep trying the pack n play but I have no real experience with that so I have no real advice. I hope it works whatever you try!
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Old 02-06-2013, 05:59 AM   #3
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Re: co sleeping night nursing not working any more wtd?

Im so glad you asked this and I cant wait to hear what everyonee says.I'm in the same situation as you only mine I'd 7 mos and if she would sleep 4 hrs I would be so thrilled. Right now she's still up every two. Sometimes she wont go back to sleep and I either have to really work for it or I've just been putting her in her crib and she goes right to sleep in there like she's finally comfortable. Most nights I start he in there and it lasts a few hrs. I cosleep bc I can't get her in her crib or Im too tired for how long it takes.
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Old 02-06-2013, 06:07 AM   #4
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What Tanya said. My 8 mo old actually slept thru the night from months 2-4 then stopped. I just don't wake fully. I lift my shirt when he cries and go back to sleep. Sometimes I think it's bc I have rolled over and my back is to him. When he can smell my chest, he sometimes goes back to sleep w/o nursing

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Old 02-06-2013, 06:19 AM   #5
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Re: co sleeping night nursing not working any more wtd?

My third child was like that- she didn't sleep through the night until she was one.

Up until she was one she co-slept with us and I fed her on demand all night. I finally could not take it anymore (I was a human zombie from lack of sleep) so we finally put her in her crib when she was one and let her cry (if she cried for more than 10 minutes I would get her because I felt bad but usually she fell asleep after a few minutes). My other tow kids were also breastfed and both slept through the night by 3 months, even with co-sleeping.

I know this is not what you want to here (believe me I know because I was you) but maybe the best thing to do is stick it out with the night nursing until she is a bit older and then try to have her sleep in her pack and play again. It really is hard though when the baby is in the room with you to have them sleep on their own though- my first child shared a room with us and would not sleep in his crib because he knew we were only a few feet away in our bed- I hadn't even heard of co-sleeping at the time but ending up doing it because it was the best way for all of us to get any sleep at night.

Good luck!
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Old 02-06-2013, 08:48 AM   #6
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Re: co sleeping night nursing not working any more wtd?

thanks guys. i love breastfeeding but i feel like i have "stuck it out" since he was about 3 months. im really trying to cope with his night time needs and want to bf as long as he wants. i will be really sad when we stop. i guess my feelings are total jealously for dh that he can just do his life thing. i do have to give him credit though its not like he isnt working. hes finishing his bachlors and taking his thesis courses (he always gets straight a's and also works part time along side schooling full time). i decided to put my life on hold and take care of owen while dh finished his degree. some times i get envious but i know it goes both ways with us. even if there is no magical cure for this i at least appreciate the support and that im not alone.

i know its not owens fault and im so happy he loves his milkies but man breastfeeding is a roller coaster! however i dont know if he would be different on formula but i dont have the heart to find out.
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Old 02-06-2013, 08:59 AM   #7
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Re: co sleeping night nursing not working any more wtd?

For a breastfed baby, 4 hours of sleep or less between feedings is normal.

It's a phase and this too shall pass. Somewhere around 7 months to a year, DD was teething and wouldn't stay asleep for much longer than 2 hours after she went down to sleep. We cosleep. I'd have to nurse her down and she'd wake up to nurse again after 3 hours. It was a combination of teething pain and being hungry. Some nights she refused to even pop off my teat. At 2 or 3am, out of pure frustration and lack of sleep, DD and I would stomp off to the kitchen to get something to eat. If I fed her a banana, she would finally be satiated and sleep 4 or 5 hours until morning.
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Old 02-06-2013, 09:01 AM   #8
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Re: co sleeping night nursing not working any more wtd?

Quote:
Originally Posted by cassie.sattler View Post
thanks guys. i love breastfeeding but i feel like i have "stuck it out" since he was about 3 months. im really trying to cope with his night time needs and want to bf as long as he wants. i will be really sad when we stop. i guess my feelings are total jealously for dh that he can just do his life thing. i do have to give him credit though its not like he isnt working. hes finishing his bachlors and taking his thesis courses (he always gets straight a's and also works part time along side schooling full time). i decided to put my life on hold and take care of owen while dh finished his degree. some times i get envious but i know it goes both ways with us. even if there is no magical cure for this i at least appreciate the support and that im not alone.

i know its not owens fault and im so happy he loves his milkies but man breastfeeding is a roller coaster! however i dont know if he would be different on formula but i dont have the heart to find out.
The envious feelings are so normal! With each of our kids I was the one who tended to them at night so that my DH could get a good night's sleep and not be tired at work. There were nights where I would be up with a crying baby and the thoughts of him being all snuggled in our bed snoring the night away made we want to strangle him.

Breastfeeding is so hard sometimes and requires such a huge commitment from us mamas but it is so worth it in the end. I am down to just bedtime feeding my 15 month old (she is our last baby) and I'm a little sad about the whole breastfeeding journey coming to an end. You know what though? I am also happy to be getting a full night's sleep every night and to be able to roll over without a baby grabbing for my boobs all night.
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Old 02-06-2013, 09:21 AM   #9
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Re: co sleeping night nursing not working any more wtd?

Yeah, sadly going to repeat what others said: night nursings are part of breastfeeding. Sometimes I wish it weren't the case (not all the time though ), but breastfed infants are probably just going to be hungry 3 times a night. My son is 13 months and he no longer gets any breastmilk except for his 3 night-nursings. It's frustrating at times, but I know he will wean soon.

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Old 02-06-2013, 10:40 AM   #10
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Re: co sleeping night nursing not working any more wtd?

You said he was eating 3 meals and 2 snacks a day and about 4 nursing sessions. Is it possible he isn't getting enough calories? Breast milk is really calorie dense, whereas baby food/finger foods tends to be more filling but have fewer calories. Could you give an example of his daily feeding schedule? Perhaps he is making up for the needed calories with the nighttime feedings. DS did this until we realized the problem and fit in an extra feeding during the day. But as others said, breast fed babies will still usually wake for middle of the night feedings no matter what.
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