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Old 02-08-2013, 11:06 AM   #31
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Ok, I totally agree with getting to know her first. But you said the issue when you were a child was with a good friends child, so will you ever really be comfortable?


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Old 02-08-2013, 11:24 AM   #32
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I would think you're strange if you did just send him on his way to a strangers house. Def just tell her the truth. Chances are she will understand.
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Old 02-08-2013, 02:12 PM   #33
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Re: Play Date Issues.

Originally Posted by megenic View Post

I don't think you're strange. I am super overprotective too, and don't even have a good reason for it. I just am. I pulled 5 year old DD out of sparks because I had a problem with all the sleepovers and other activities I had to leave her at.
I'm a Brownie leader and one of our mom's shared your thoughts so convinced her to become a leader. win win for all of us!

Although seriously, have you see the GGC Safe Guide? (it's online) The rules and procedures are endless. If it's being followed I can't see how anything could happen to a girl at a GGC event.
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Old 02-14-2013, 09:38 PM   #34
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Re: Play Date Issues.

No pressure! I wouldn't let my kids play with someone I've never met.
An indoor play place where you can see them at all times would be a good start.
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Old 02-14-2013, 10:32 PM   #35
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I'd invite her and the son and whoever else is in the house over to get to know them. Let them see the house as it is. Maybe you'll like her and she'll back off for a bit until you can get to know them better.
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Old 02-15-2013, 10:25 AM   #36
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Originally Posted by Ms.Kaun
Let me start this by saying I am not a snob, I promise. I have reasons for not wanting my children to do play dates. One being I happened to have been abused on a play date when I was a child. By my Mom's trusted friends child. So here is the situation.

We just moved and have been in our new house for about a month I think. Right away one of my sons found a new best friend. This new friend has been asking my son to come over every week since they met. First it started out with he gave my son his phone number. Next weekend he sent a note home from his mom with her e-mail and phone number. Very nice I thought but I told my son to just let his friend know we were very busy moving in right now (our moving truck had arrived that weekend too I believe) and maybe some other time. Last week he didn't ask but my son was also home sick with an ear ache. Today my son came home with a really cute note again saying please come over from his friend.

I honestly don't know how to handle the situation because on one hand I can see that I am being pretty over-protective and I feel bad. I don't allow them to stay places like birthday parties alone and unless I know the parent we don't do play dates with strangers. I also never leave my kids on those play dates. I do this because of experiences I have had in life that I honestly would love to protect my children from. I let them have plenty of fun and I swear I am not up their butts 24/7 but when it comes to play dates I prefer a meet up in a park where I can fully supervise myself. I'd ask that but right now it is cold as heck in MN and we are constantly covered in snow. Having a play date at our house right now isn't an option either, our house is still covered in boxes. I'm slowly unpacking but I'm almost 7 months pregnant and have a lot on my plate to get ready for baby and set up a new life here. This move was a cross country move.

I was thinking of e-mailing the mom but how do I do it without saying, "Hey! I'm a crazy over-protective mom and I don't know you so no!" because in all honesty when things settle down I don't mind getting to know his friend's mom to have play dates. I just am crazy busy and swamped with things atm. I feel a little bad because I don't know if we will get to it this any time soon.
What would you do? Any advice?
Can the boys play outside on a play date in your yard? We just moved into our home in August, so we are fairly new to the neighborhood. However, the kids play outside together all of the time, which is great. At the very least I think you should send her an email explaining how busy you are unpacking, that you are pregnant, etc, otherwise you may come across as being unneighborly
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Old 02-15-2013, 11:06 AM   #37
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Re: Play Date Issues.

OK. We're talking about a 9 or 10 yo boy here, right? Find a neutral place for the boys to get together and hang out while you sit down with the other mom for some coffee or something. If they are bookworms (my eldest is), then go to a bookstore. If they are more active, then something like an inflatables place during free play or an indoor park. Remember, you are new in town so you can ask HER for ideas. There is nothing wrong with saying, "I'd love to get together with you and the boys somewhere, but I'm new in town and am not familiar with good places. We also just moved and you know how expensive that is, so if you know of any low budget places, fill me in!" This opens the door for her to share ideas and perhaps even just say, "Come on over. I'll put on a pot of coffee and we'll let the boys play in the playroom/play Kinnect Sports/build a Lego city."

It will be good for you and it's ok fr you to take a break. You might even make a friend!
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