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Old 03-02-2013, 06:36 PM   #21
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Re: Anyone have a DH that was NOT considering a large family?

My dh would have been happy with one. He was an only child and had a great childhood, and had always wanted a son, and our first happened to be a boy. Our second was a big surprise when ds1 was 4 months old, and honestly, dh was in a shock for quite a while. And then he was REALLY done. Then we had another surprise when ds2 was a year old. Unfortunately, that resulted in a 2nd trimester miscarriage. That was devastating for me, and made me realize I really wanted a 3rd child. He did NOT at all. It was a really bad time between us, because I never wanted to push him into having more children than he wanted, but I also was so sad at the loss of my pregnancy and the thought of never having a third. Dh finally agreed to try for the summer and if we got pregnant that would be okay, and if not it wasn't meant to be. Well ds3 is the light of my dh's life. My other two were mama's boys, but ds3 is such a huge daddy's boy.

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Old 03-03-2013, 10:26 PM   #22
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DH wanted 2 or 3 and now we have 4

We are planning on being done now, which is good (our oldest is 6 and the youngest is almost 11 mon) I'm exhausted! I'd love more (I think) LOL, and he just recently told me "maybe we'll take a break and when our youngest is 4 we could have another one." So we shall see, I definitely never thought I'd hear him say that.
Although we do NFP so we know another one is always a possibility and we are okay with that.
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Old 03-04-2013, 07:47 AM   #23
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Re: Anyone have a DH that was NOT considering a large family?

My DH was all for just having one and my son from previous. I wanted 5 total. After DS2 (our first) we did NFP and failed. DS3 came only 15 months after the birth of our first who ended up with special needs. DH was not thrilled about having DS3 and said no more after him. I got the Paragaurd IUD after, but still wanted at least one more. I finally got DH on board with one more. 2 years later. I promised if he allowed for one more then I would have a tubal.

Needless to say we had DS4 and I cannot have anymore children. So I got 4 babies instead of 5. We compromised.
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Old 03-04-2013, 09:14 AM   #24
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Re: Anyone have a DH that was NOT considering a large family?

My DH said before we got married that he only wanted two children. He said one to replace him and one to replace me in the world. He said that our world was too overpopulated. So, anyway, we had our second child in 2010 and he said that we were done. I told him that I wasn't done. By 2011 he agreed that maybe one more would be ok, but not until 2014 when our oldest will be in Kindergarten. Accident came and we are now due with #3 in May 2013. I told him again that I am still not done and would like 4-6 kids and he disagreed. He is 12 years older than me so he would like to be finished having children. I see his point since he'll be 60 when #3 is 18 years-old. I really want an even number of children, I know I'm wierd. I have something against odd numbers. I told DH that if he truly didn't want any more children after this one that he needed to get fixed. He won't let me get fixed, cuz I want to get my Uterus burned when I am done having kids, so that I will also be done with my monthly cycle. DH says it is too permanent and says that he'll get fixed after baby is born and we are sure everything checks out ok. So, we'll see what is happens. I'm really hoping for at least #4.
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Old 03-04-2013, 09:25 AM   #25
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DH has a 13 yr old daughter and we have an 8 month old dd. he really wants a boy & I really want 3-4 kids so hopefully our next one is a girl again so he lets us have a third. I could be happy with 3 but more so with 4
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Old 03-05-2013, 03:09 PM   #26
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Re: Anyone have a DH that was NOT considering a large family?

Oh yeah, right here!
DH said one MAYBE two, but that was pushing it. So we had two and then proceeded to get rid of all our baby things, as well as move halfway across the country. About 5 months after we moved, we discovered #3 snuck up on us. I was really upset but dh was thrilled. Fast forward 7 years and we now have 5 and do not want anymore, but might be pregnant w/ #6 :O
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Old 03-05-2013, 03:39 PM   #27
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Re: Anyone have a DH that was NOT considering a large family?

Nope.... If it were up to DH we would have had 3 more other than DS#1 by now...

I think Im the one that never envisioned herself with more than one child.... Don't get me wrong i LOOOVE kids but just the financials of it all have always scared me away from having more. This LO snuck in on us after 6 years of being together. needless to say if they make it past the goalie it was meant to be!
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Old 03-06-2013, 09:26 PM   #28
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Re: Anyone have a DH that was NOT considering a large family?

Yep. Although I don't think I'm considered a large family. But anyways, my DH knew that my number of children I wanted was unlimited (leaving it up to God) and if that meant 12+, then thats how many I would have. He agreed while dating. Yea, after #1, he changed his mind. 1 was a perfectly fine number. Ummmm WHAT? Anyways, he has never prevented so it always happens and we are on #5 now, but I'm sure he would have been just fine had I have chosen to get "fixed" after #1 (which I'm against) and he is too scared to get fixed himself. So here we are. This time he is really talking about getting a V after this babe I sure hope he changes his mind.
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Old 03-06-2013, 09:29 PM   #29
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Re: Anyone have a DH that was NOT considering a large family?

My hubs also has only 1 sibling 11yrs. older than him, and I am 1 of 7 kids. There is no one in his family that has lots of children, or having children NOW at all. LOL. So I'm sure that plays a huge roll in it. Our soon to be 5 kids under 6yrs. old seems like A LOT, while I'm thinking it's just the norm. and we could probably add a few more to make it a lot
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Old 03-22-2013, 04:12 PM   #30
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Re: Anyone have a DH that was NOT considering a large family?

My DH was done at 2. The third one was a total surprise to him and me. The fourth one was either a total temping failure or a true birth control method failure - not sure which.

So now we have 4 kids.

I am okay with stopping. But I love kids and really REALLY enjoy being a mom. I feel like I'm just getting good at this! lol. But I've told DH we can stop and I'd be okay with it (I was very NOT okay with it after just 2... and that was a rough time for us)...

But now DH seems hesitant about getting the permanent fix.... I don't think it's cause he's changed his mind... but I also know that if he doesn't get the big V done, we will wind up preggo again. We're both very fertile. I keep encouraging him to make that appointment! But, truth is, I'm okay if he doesn't.

We'll see where life takes us. I'm alright either way. We have 2 boys and 2 girls and I couldn't be happier with our family dynamic right now.

I don't think DH really WANTS a big family, but I think he's scared of getting the procedure done, and I am NOT getting any permanent thing done to me b/c I had all the babies and I am not down for that.
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