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Old 02-14-2013, 11:20 AM   #1
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Valentine's Day vent

On Monday I got the following instructions from my DD's preschool to bring a "valentine" into school today. "Let your child write their name on the valentine and write their classmates names on the envelope." (Verbatim from the instructions). This seemed odd to me so I check with the teacher who confirms that I should buy a card and send it to school. I got one, let my DD write her name in the card and then I write the whole class list on the envelope.

At school, it turns out I was supposed to do individual cards for 20 kids! When I looked confused (because the instructions leaves a lot to be desired) the teacher is: "Oh, because you are not form here. You don't know what it is do you?" Yeah, America is really the only country that does Valentine's day.

Then, a mother helps me write out 20 miniature cards (thankfully the teacher had some I could use) says: Oh, you probably don't know about Valentine's day. It is really a holiday for kids. I really like to see the treats kids get on this day.

Well, maybe they are both right: maybe it is an American thing. I turned to the mother and politely say: When has a holiday that is about romantic love and sex become "about the children". We do have Valentine's day in South Africa. We give out cards, chocolates and flowers and make dates and go to dinner. Never ever is it about kids giving each other cards and candy!

My daughter came home with a bag full of cards and candy. Ran up to the door, knocked on it and said: "Trick or treat!" So, she's rightly confused.

I am not a scrooge. I do not mind this type of action at Christmas, Easter and Halloween. But Valentine's day? Really?

I also see on facebook pictures of parents giving their children heart shaped pancakes and a gift bag next to it. Like it is Christmas.

What is going on??????

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Old 02-14-2013, 11:26 AM   #2
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Re: Valentine's Day vent

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Originally Posted by vatblack View Post
On Monday I got the following instructions from my DD's preschool to bring a "valentine" into school today. "Let your child write their name on the valentine and write their classmates names on the envelope." (Verbatim from the instructions). This seemed odd to me so I check with the teacher who confirms that I should buy a card and send it to school. I got one, let my DD write her name in the card and then I write the whole class list on the envelope.

At school, it turns out I was supposed to do individual cards for 20 kids! When I looked confused (because the instructions leaves a lot to be desired) the teacher is: "Oh, because you are not form here. You don't know what it is do you?" Yeah, America is really the only country that does Valentine's day.

Then, a mother helps me write out 20 miniature cards (thankfully the teacher had some I could use) says: Oh, you probably don't know about Valentine's day. It is really a holiday for kids. I really like to see the treats kids get on this day.

Well, maybe they are both right: maybe it is an American thing. I turned to the mother and politely say: When has a holiday that is about romantic love and sex become "about the children". We do have Valentine's day in South Africa. We give out cards, chocolates and flowers and make dates and go to dinner. Never ever is it about kids giving each other cards and candy!

My daughter came home with a bag full of cards and candy. Ran up to the door, knocked on it and said: "Trick or treat!" So, she's rightly confused.

I am not a scrooge. I do not mind this type of action at Christmas, Easter and Halloween. But Valentine's day? Really?

I also see on facebook pictures of parents giving their children heart shaped pancakes and a gift bag next to it. Like it is Christmas.

What is going on??????
Hahahaha, I know! If it helps at all, I went to high school in America about ten years ago, and if St Valentine's day was about children then, we were completely oblivious. We called it V.D.
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Old 02-14-2013, 11:26 AM   #3
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Re: Valentine's Day vent

I think that is pretty normal here. My oldest is 16, and she STILL brings individual Valentines for her friends

We do little goodie bags and slide the Valentines cards in them. One for each classmate, and they each have a few pieces of candy in it.
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Old 02-14-2013, 11:31 AM   #4
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Re: Valentine's Day vent

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Originally Posted by vatblack View Post
On Monday I got the following instructions from my DD's preschool to bring a "valentine" into school today. "Let your child write their name on the valentine and write their classmates names on the envelope." (Verbatim from the instructions). This seemed odd to me so I check with the teacher who confirms that I should buy a card and send it to school. I got one, let my DD write her name in the card and then I write the whole class list on the envelope.

At school, it turns out I was supposed to do individual cards for 20 kids! When I looked confused (because the instructions leaves a lot to be desired) the teacher is: "Oh, because you are not form here. You don't know what it is do you?" Yeah, America is really the only country that does Valentine's day.

Then, a mother helps me write out 20 miniature cards (thankfully the teacher had some I could use) says: Oh, you probably don't know about Valentine's day. It is really a holiday for kids. I really like to see the treats kids get on this day.

Well, maybe they are both right: maybe it is an American thing. I turned to the mother and politely say: When has a holiday that is about romantic love and sex become "about the children". We do have Valentine's day in South Africa. We give out cards, chocolates and flowers and make dates and go to dinner. Never ever is it about kids giving each other cards and candy!

My daughter came home with a bag full of cards and candy. Ran up to the door, knocked on it and said: "Trick or treat!" So, she's rightly confused.

I am not a scrooge. I do not mind this type of action at Christmas, Easter and Halloween. But Valentine's day? Really?

I also see on facebook pictures of parents giving their children heart shaped pancakes and a gift bag next to it. Like it is Christmas.

What is going on??????


That teacher sounds like an interesting one. DD's teacher did the same thing but she spelled out the instructions well enough a 5 yo would understand.

And to the bolded, I don't know about everyone else but I love anything that gives me an excuse for doing something outside of our norm. We did heart shaped pancakes and a small teddy. I have a clover shaped form for St. Patricks day too. I want my kids to be able to look back when they are grown and have fun memories they can associate with certain times of the year.
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Old 02-14-2013, 11:33 AM   #5
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That's how Valentine's Day has always been in my experience.

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Old 02-14-2013, 11:35 AM   #6
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Re: Valentine's Day vent

Okay, I get that it is an American thing now. I think it is absurd though. I honestly do.
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Old 02-14-2013, 11:45 AM   #7
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I think it's sweet. I like to make a big deal out of holidays. Why not add some magic to their lives especially when they are little?
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Old 02-14-2013, 11:46 AM   #8
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Re: Valentine's Day vent

Maybe I should explain why I find this so strange or absurd as I have said above. In my experience Valentine's day is about mystery and the chance to express your love secretly. It is about the chase and the catch and the sealing of deals.

You would buy flowers for the girl you love or chocolates for the guy you like and not sign your name to it. The person who receives it has the fun to try and guess who it comes from. The sender may or may not reveal who they are. Some girls/guys gets lots and lots.

For married couples/established it is about celebrating their love for each other. It is about waking up the romance again.

So, it really makes me feel uncomfortable that it is celebrated by toddlers.

Also, I feel that some things that is for adults should stay for adults. Why do we have to make everything about our kids. I feel kids here get too much attention in the form of candy and gifts.
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Last edited by vatblack; 02-14-2013 at 11:51 AM.
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Old 02-14-2013, 11:47 AM   #9
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We always do valentines for the kids class but I don't get my kids anything for valentines day. Maybe I am no fun.
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Old 02-14-2013, 11:48 AM   #10
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I'm surprised there were instructions at all. Haven't you seen the isles of boxes of cards for kids that are like $5 in all the stores for the past month or two?

It's not absurd, no need to be rude about we weird americans and our holidays. I'm quite sure there are even weirder things in africa than us giving kids cute cards and a little candy. It's not about sex, it's just a sweet holiday. I am almost 30 and we did this as kids too. It's normal. You've been here a number of years correct? I am really shocked you've never seen all those boxes of cards or talked to anyone with school age kids, etc.
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