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Old 08-27-2013, 10:43 PM   #1
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Splitting twins in school

We just split up my boys in prek this year and one has started crying when I drop him off My boys have been together in preschool at this school for 2 years and went to daycare before that so I guess I'm just surprised this is happening now. Anyone else experience this and have any advice? I guess he is a little anxious without his twin.

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Old 08-27-2013, 11:04 PM   #2
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Re: Splitting twins in school

Why are you splitting them up?
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Old 08-27-2013, 11:14 PM   #3
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Why are you splitting them up?
Because they are fighting all the time at home,
and they will have to be split next year anyway I thought it may be better in a more familiar environment.

I think it will be better for them long term but I don't want to turn this into a debate about splitting up twins.
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Old 08-27-2013, 11:25 PM   #4
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Re: Splitting twins in school

My brother and sister are twins and my mom didn't separate them until they got into middle school (and at that point it was inevitable and natural, really, since they switch classrooms for every subject). My brother was really anxious when they were babies/young about being away from his twin so she didn't think it would be a good idea to separate them any earlier. She didn't want to add to the stress (and part of it was I don't think she liked the idea of them being apart, either).

They're much more independent of each other now and just sort of "separated" on their own. They don't have many (if any) of the same classes/interests since they're starting high school this year. They share some friends/classmates but also have their own friends. But when they were younger it was definitely better for the two of them (especially my brother) to be together up until middle school. Just from watching them, I think separation for twins is better when it's lead by them as they grow up and it's their decision.

I don't think it would be bad for them to be put together, if you can still do that, but that's your choice and what you want for them. I think it's pretty natural for twins that young to experience anxiety at being separated or for one to be more independent than the other and okay with being on their own. It'll probably just take some time for him to get used to the idea.
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Old 09-03-2013, 01:45 AM   #5
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Re: Splitting twins in school

Not twins but my older two are 12 months apart. My younger had anxiety and would be MISERABLE without his brother. In the end we decided that his stress wasn't worth any benefit of having them "alone" so they did everything together. Naturally they have started taking up their own interests at nearly 10 and 11 but still do a LOT together which is what they both prefer.
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Old 09-03-2013, 04:13 AM   #6
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Re: Splitting twins in school

do you do activities just with one so they have each an identity or just share with both all activities? If you have seen Full house with the twins: to get one to zoo and one to ball game and do things separately so they can be happy together yet have an identity away from each other? They will eventually play together at recess at school even if not in same room.
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Old 09-03-2013, 09:56 AM   #7
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do you do activities just with one so they have each an identity or just share with both all activities? If you have seen Full house with the twins: to get one to zoo and one to ball game and do things separately so they can be happy together yet have an identity away from each other? They will eventually play together at recess at school even if not in same room.
Yes we do this a lot
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Old 09-03-2013, 10:44 AM   #8
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Re: Splitting twins in school

I homeschool. So, it's a non-issue for us.

If you want them separate this year, I'd just keep going. He should get used to it.

Personally, I would probably keep them together until next year when they have to be split. Why force it if you don't need to, KWIM? I doubt they will fight with so many other kids around. Mine bicker (all my kids bicker) when it's just them, but they rarely do when other kids are around.

Good luck!
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Old 09-16-2013, 09:18 AM   #9
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Re: Splitting twins in school

My twins aren't even 1 yet but I think it would be a good idea because if they are together I'm afraid they'll just keep to themselves and being in different classes will force them to play with diff kids, etc, so i'm sure its a great idea
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Old 09-16-2013, 03:54 PM   #10
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Re: Splitting twins in school

I don't have twins, but my niece and my son would have gone to the same school this year and I would have split them up if I had any say just because i think they might distract each other too.
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