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Old 03-01-2013, 02:18 PM   #1
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What are you best ideas, resources, etc. for helping a child progress emotionally?

Having/been having some issues with my 3.5 year old as far as emotional milestones. I have three other children and have taken care of A LOT of kids thru my daycare and my church, relatives, volunteering and more. I can safely say that my 3 year old struggles with emotions and this results in impulse control, frustration, tantrums. She is being evaluated this week. although she doesnt have any physical delays or health issues, it is possible there is something else going on with her. Even if the evaluation does not discover/diagnose something, I personally feel that does not change the struggles she is having and the support that she needs.

Mainly what I am seeing effects her relationships and social behavior. She has trouble with appropriate behavior at appropriate times, and it is definitely more than what a normal 3 year old would have trouble with. Too loud whenever is supposed to be quiet, too quiet and stubbornly reserved when she should participate, too wild when she should be calm, short attention span, very little capability for focus (unless it is a few select favorite activities), hyperactive, aggressive with other kids (even a hug done with good intentions is too strong, too long, too much for other kids). she is quite smart and doing well verbally but again, its all social behavior. she has regressed from fully potty trained for months all the way back to diapers full time. she eats fine but does not cooperate well at the table even though we have a daily routine, house rules, structure, etc. she does not do well with either consequences or even reward systems. i am not big on consequences for this age as i try to handle things proactively. having a daily routine in place solves about 90% of the issues with the other kids but not her. you can tell her something and she wont remember it a second later, even if she just got "punished" for it. by punished, i mean the rarely used chill out corner or other natural consequence. i dont do time limits, hold kids in timeout or make things a battle. if the kids cant behave, i have them sit in the chill out corner, tell them a short explanation of why they are there, they can come out whenever they are ready to calm down and change their behavior. doesnt work for her though it works for all the kids, including the one year olds. her tantrums have lasted for up to two hours. she has a hard time calming herself, or verbalizing when she is emotionally (even though she has a large vocabulary). she is the hitter/bitter that does not form or retain friendships. she is trying but i will be honest is saying that most kids do not like her very much. she does not share, take turns, group play well at all

this is just a portion of the struggles we have with her. i realize that she does need more strategies that help keep her world calm, that help her deal with her emotions, that help with impulse control.

some of these issues may stem from sensory issues. she is the kid that likes to swing or jump on the trampoline for long periods. she is the risk taker and the intense kid.

what would you suggest as far as resources for me?

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Last edited by doodah; 03-01-2013 at 02:21 PM.
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Old 03-01-2013, 02:40 PM   #2
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Re: What are you best ideas, resources, etc. for helping a child progress emotionally

Sounds a lot like my 3 1/2 yr old son. He has Behavioral Disorder and SPD (Sensory Seeking). We struggle with him as well. I have no special strategies as nothing we have tried has worked. We just try to remain more calm and patient with him.
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Old 03-01-2013, 02:57 PM   #3
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Re: What are you best ideas, resources, etc. for helping a child progress emotionally

Quote:
Originally Posted by l_Kimmie_l View Post
Sounds a lot like my 3 1/2 yr old son. He has Behavioral Disorder and SPD (Sensory Seeking). We struggle with him as well. I have no special strategies as nothing we have tried has worked. We just try to remain more calm and patient with him.
What is the plan from specialists regarding his behavior? is he in therapy of some sort? what have you tried so far, even if it hasnt worked?
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Old 03-01-2013, 04:03 PM   #4
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Re: What are you best ideas, resources, etc. for helping a child progress emotionally

He gets OT. We use sticker charts with rewards mostly as they seem to work most often. Such as, "If you have a nice quiet voice you will earn a sticker/M&M/game." We also do not give in to tantruming no matter how long it lasts and it can last quite some time at times. He was in special school but is too smart to be there now. It is a shame as he was making strides there.
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Old 03-01-2013, 05:02 PM   #5
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Re: What are you best ideas, resources, etc. for helping a child progress emotionally

She sounds exactly like my five year old nephew - autistic and sensory processing disorder. :/
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