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Old 03-29-2013, 08:58 AM   #11
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Would have done the same.

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Old 03-29-2013, 10:05 AM   #12
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Re: Neighbors kid-what would you have done?

You did the right thing! Being a good parent (even to other children) often involves making a choice that you know is probably right but feels kinda crummy in your heart. Buy um yea...he sounds a little more than just mischievous.
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Old 03-29-2013, 10:41 AM   #13
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Re: Neighbors kid-what would you have done?

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Originally Posted by dancermommy1 View Post
Thanks I feel better knowing I was supposed to act like a mom

I did tell him that If he insisted on that language and attitude we would leave and he would not be allowed around our family (he loves to play basketball in the culdesac with my DH).
Our neighborhood is just one dead end street and we are all pretty close, and his mon texted me last night (she wasn't home at the time of the incident) and was really apologetic and was glad I said something to them.

Two years ago he used another neighbors key to get into their house and drill holes in their furniture with a power drill while they were away... I mean, he was only 5, but thats just his nature--a bit devilish. He's a good kid, he just needs a lot of guidance. A lot.
I dunno, in light of this info, and in response to him saying thi
Quote:
"you aren't my mom you can't make me" argument.
I might have been inclined to say something like

"I am A mom and that means I can. You get to sit in the corner(in time out) for 5 minutes now." And then follow through.

OR

"No but your mom can, let me give her a call." And then do so.
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Old 03-29-2013, 10:44 AM   #14
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Re: Neighbors kid-what would you have done?

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Originally Posted by dancermommy1 View Post
Thanks I feel better knowing I was supposed to act like a mom

I did tell him that If he insisted on that language and attitude we would leave and he would not be allowed around our family (he loves to play basketball in the culdesac with my DH).
Our neighborhood is just one dead end street and we are all pretty close, and his mon texted me last night (she wasn't home at the time of the incident) and was really apologetic and was glad I said something to them.

Two years ago he used another neighbors key to get into their house and drill holes in their furniture with a power drill while they were away... I mean, he was only 5, but thats just his nature--a bit devilish. He's a good kid, he just needs a lot of guidance. A lot.
I would have said something the first time. But, if the child continued, I would have said something to the parents and let them take it from there. But, it really all depends on what the child was saying. I know you don't want him saying it in front of your LO, but it is hard to say if it was language that would be inappropriate for a 6 year old.

However, I wouldn't have threatened to not allow him around your family. He is 6. 6 year olds say inappropriate things at times. Unless what he said was truly horrible, I think banning a 6 year old entirely is over the top. Let his parents punish him if needed.
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Old 03-29-2013, 11:27 AM   #15
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I think you handled it very well, and I'm glad the Dad did something about it.

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Agreed

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Old 03-29-2013, 12:31 PM   #16
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You did the right thing. Sure you're not his mom but you have every right to tell him how to speak to your baby.

If he was my child I would want to know.
In my experiences with kids other than my own, the ones who use the "you're not my mom" line don't listen to their own moms, either. That attitude is very disrepectful, and based on that alone (not even the bad words), I wouldn't want my kids around one likw that. I would be mortified and not any too happy with my own child if they spoke like that to an adult that they knew, and I would certainly want to know about it!

The only thing I would have done differently is to tell the little boy that it was time for him to go home. You did the right thing to tell his dad, for sure.
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Old 03-29-2013, 04:02 PM   #17
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Re: Neighbors kid-what would you have done?

Wait.....didn't you just post a question about a girl being mean to your DS too?


Hmmm......I suppose you are just learning the ways of kids mixing with other kids.


I totally agree with pp. You can't expect to "hang out" with a 6 year old and not have something be dropped. I have older kids come into my house because I have older kids. I tell them in no uncertain terms that they are not allowed any potty mouth as I have a 3 year old(and a 1 year old) and I do NOT want him saying those words. So I will tell them off if they drop a word or two. Tell them they need to leave if they cannot control themselves.


Even when my kids were more age 5 playing with fellow 5 year olds I would tell the other kids that we don't say stupid or dumb in this house.


I don't really understand if you were playing outside? In your house or their house? I probably wouldn't encourage them playing together to be honest as that is a big age difference.


Of course my older kids drop stuff all the time, so I the 3 year old picks up stuff anyway despite my best efforts.
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Old 03-29-2013, 04:03 PM   #18
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Re: Neighbors kid-what would you have done?

If it was in your home then I would have said playtime is over. I have sent kids home before when not behaving. They soon learn....
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Old 03-29-2013, 04:50 PM   #19
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Re: Neighbors kid-what would you have done?

I was at their house. The older girl sometimes "babysits" our son when I'm home but need to get something done (well, this was when he was a bit younger). They were on spring break and asked if we would come up. I don't think it's a big deal for those ages to play together. Siblings with those age differences play together all the time, and Montessori encourages exchange between age groups.

It really wasn't the language, it was the disrespect and unwillingness to knock it off that bothered me. His mom was absolutely mortified but you're right, he doesn't listen to her either.

Yes, I did post about another girl being mean to him. I'm not overly protective if that's what you're thinking, it just was random chance that these two things happened this week. He's in daycare--stuff happens--but these were different because they were intentional rather than just thoughtless and do its new territory for me.
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Old 03-29-2013, 06:24 PM   #20
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Re: Neighbors kid-what would you have done?

Quote:
Originally Posted by dancermommy1 View Post
I was at their house. The older girl sometimes "babysits" our son when I'm home but need to get something done (well, this was when he was a bit younger). They were on spring break and asked if we would come up. I don't think it's a big deal for those ages to play together. Siblings with those age differences play together all the time, and Montessori encourages exchange between age groups.

It really wasn't the language, it was the disrespect and unwillingness to knock it off that bothered me. His mom was absolutely mortified but you're right, he doesn't listen to her either.

Yes, I did post about another girl being mean to him. I'm not overly protective if that's what you're thinking, it just was random chance that these two things happened this week. He's in daycare--stuff happens--but these were different because they were intentional rather than just thoughtless and do its new territory for me.
My older kids used to play with two neighbors kids about that age when they were younger too. You just need to know when to draw the line etc. They were very respectful btw, amazing kids, but more just pushing them super fast in toy ride ons etc.

Honestly, once the boy knows that you won't put up with him being disrespectful then it should stop. Often kids listen to others but not their own parents, lol. If he doesn't then I would avoid a playtime like that though.

I didn't comment on the other thread as it's just one of those things that will constantly happen. You will be at the park, at the store, at preschool. I think you did the right thing. Once again, once she knows you won't put up with her saying things like that, it will stop.
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