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Old 04-21-2013, 12:13 PM   #21
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I feel similar at playdates! It's really frustrating when your kids see other people's kids not following the rules and think its great to imitate.

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Old 04-21-2013, 12:14 PM   #22
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Re: Am I really that much stricter than other Moms?

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Our friends think I am a drill sergeant But they always complement how well behaved our children are. I am never clear why they can't make the correlation between boundaries and behavior I am no joke about appropriate behavior and when we have children guests I lay it down for them too. Everybody knows that I say what I mean and mean what I say. I am rather fed up with children running around acting like they have no home training. Now I will crawl down off of my soap box.
Yeah, ours don't seem to grasp that either, LOL. I have so many friends who comment on how calm and well-behaved our kids are (as theirs are running around screaming and destroying stuff and they are completely oblivious to it). I'm like HELLO... that kind of stuff isn't acceptable at my house and my children know it. Running/screaming/throwing is outdoor activity in this house.
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Old 04-21-2013, 12:52 PM   #23
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Re: Am I really that much stricter than other Moms?

We have rules but not the same as the OP. Meals are at the table (mostly, dh often eats in the livingroom) but there is no hard rule about eating in the livingroom. Food staying downstairs is a soft rule (I can break it, as well as dh or my teen. I might also allow popcorn for movies upstairs). Balls are free to fly in the playroom and sometimes the livingroom if I am participating. The Nerf dart guns are used all over the house when we get into that. There is no jumping on furniture, including beds. I don't mind running (if they get hurt running, they will slow down). I do have a rule about coming in and out. Shoes off at the door and no going in and out constantly. If they are doing that I warn that the next time they come in....they stay in. One warning. NO slamming doors. Ever.

If we had more kids, or a smaller home then I might have some of the same rules as OP. For our situation, some of them just aren't necessary. I guess I make rules as things become a problem. Running, throwing balls, and snacks (non-messy) in the livingroom just haven't been a problem.

ETA: my kids are fully capable of following other peoples rules. For example, they don't play ball inside at my parents because they have lots of breakables around (I'm not a knick-knack type). Somehow, they figured that all out on their own. No retraining necessary every time they enter a different setting.
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Last edited by syfitz; 04-21-2013 at 01:03 PM.
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Old 04-21-2013, 12:54 PM   #24
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Re: Am I really that much stricter than other Moms?

Yup, I am the mean mom amonng my circle of people.


I am actually called "tight-ship" cause I run a "tight ship" lol.

I don't hesitate to discipline and I will do what I need to do to stop inappropriate behavior, no matter where I am, who is watching, or what ppl think. I don't want or need little tornado children running amuck, destroying everything, screaming their faces off...
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Old 04-21-2013, 01:06 PM   #25
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Re: Am I really that much stricter than other Moms?

I think these are great! My son is young so we don't have any set rules that he understands but it drives me crazy when moms don't discipline their children. If your child hits my son for no reason you need to do something! If they are old enough to hit with purpose then they are old enough to be disciplined!
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Old 04-21-2013, 01:13 PM   #26
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I don't think they are strict. We don't allow jumping on the furniture (with beds the exception because DD1 has sensory issues and we didn't have a trampoline for a long time), I do allow running as long as you stop when I say stop. We don't allow screaming and yelling inside either. I wouldn't have any problem with those rules.
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Old 04-21-2013, 01:16 PM   #27
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Re: Am I really that much stricter than other Moms?

Those are normal rules and it doesn't make you strict. However, people who don't share those rules doesn't make their kids horrible or misbehaved. My kids are constantly complimented by family, friends and strangers. My kids are allowed to run and jump in the basement (there is nothing in there but a few tote boxes and a old couch), they are allowed to jump and climb on the couch in the basement and in their toy room, they are allowed to throw soft balls in the toy room and basement, they are allowed to jump on the bed. They don't jump on the living room furniture, dinning room furniture or the furniture of others. Meals are eaten at the table but snacks can be eaten in the toy room or living room as long as they are sitting down.

My rules are -
Legos and puzzles can be played at the table or hard floor surface (only reason is so it's easier to clean up)

Toys can be played with anywhere but you have to pick them up at the end of the day or when you're done with them and ready for something new

You have to sit when eating snacks

Dishes need to go into the sink or counter

Clothes go into the hamper

No shoes on in the house

That's pretty much it, and I don't have unruly kids
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Old 04-21-2013, 01:20 PM   #28
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Re: Am I really that much stricter than other Moms?

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Well I have 9 and they could overthrow me so I run this house with an iron fist! LOL!

No yelling in the house
No fighting
No running, jumping, flipping in the house
Your toys must be out of common areas as soon as you are done with them
ALL food is eaten at the table
Only water is allowed out of the kitchen
Dishes must always be taken to the sink
When its cold out, no going in and out. Once you come in, you stay in.
Absolutely no back talking mama
You MUST obey. I will ask once, then punishment.
Bedtime is non-negotiable. I will tuck them once and tell them I better not see them out of their room unless blood is involved! They can use the bathroom but only if necessary.

Mostly common sense stuff. But, people always compliment us when we are out as to how well behaved our kids are. I am firm with consequences and consistency!

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The bolded must be the reason that I don't feel the need for a long list of rules. This is the mother of all rules and is followed well. If something is starting to bother me (like noise level), I tell them to stop...and they do. Sometimes things bother me that might not bother me at another time. As long as my kids are following the "immediate obedience" rule, things are good.
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Old 04-21-2013, 02:23 PM   #29
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Re: Am I really that much stricter than other Moms?

Nope. We pretty much have the same rules...but you saw my behavior chart. So we do have some other "common sense" rules.
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Old 04-21-2013, 02:32 PM   #30
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Re: Am I really that much stricter than other Moms?

We have those rules so I have my sanity!

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We don't have any of those rules and we don't have food all over the house, broken furniture, broken windows or dented heads? Maybe bc I only have one?

<snip>

We have a problem with throwing things though. Balls are allowed to be thrown as we only have soft ones in the house. But DS will all of a sudden throw his cars and that doesn't "fly"! but I can't seem to get him to stop, even though it is rule. I don't even know what brings it on, he will be playing and all of a sudden we have a car flying across the room? Anyway we are working on that one.


EDIT: we do have the no yelling in the house.
No fighting, no use of toys as weapons. My DS doesn't even know about toy guns, swords or anything like that.
Our drinks all have caps/tops so no spills, except coffee which I normally don't take out of the kitchen. DH drinks his coffee out of a to go cup with a closing spout!
Food is allowed in living room, DS must wipe his hands after he eats a bite or snack. He has his own little towels for this!
MORE:toys on shelves can be played with without an adult, picked up when done. Toys on the higher shelves must be asked for played with and put back.
Yes. I'm certain it's because you only have one. I'm telling you: They feed off each other and their common sense goes out the window when you get siblings together. It's not the same with kids that aren't your siblings. It's much easier to fight with someone who is always there than friends who aren't.

My Oma used to say, "One boy is a boy. Two boys are half a boy. Three boys are no boy at all." She was referring to how her boys used their common sense when they got together.

And when boys turn about 9 they get really goofy and do dumb things together with their friends. At least all the ones around here do.

I'm just curious about these little towels. Who gets them out for him? Who makes sure they don't pile up all over the house? Who puts them in the laundry? Who washes them and puts them away?

We have a system similar to this bolded, but unless I am on my kids 24/7 (I have 3 out of the womb so far now), it isn't done consistently. It was really awesome when it was just DS1 and me, but it has gotten more challenging with the increase in population around here.
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