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Old 04-22-2013, 04:12 PM   #61
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Nope, not at all. Everything you mentioned is basic manners. Our society is failing for sure. There are a lot of kids with no manners and poor behavior. Instead of correcting them or teaching them parents make excuses.

We also have no yelling, inside voices only.

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Old 04-22-2013, 04:13 PM   #62
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Originally Posted by Bhavana

Unless it is a small house/lots of furniture/downstairs neighbors...why no running in the house?
For us, inside a home is no place for running. Outside, a gym, track, park, trail, etc are places to run.
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Old 04-22-2013, 04:17 PM   #63
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Originally Posted by sisu
Seems like common sense to me, unless you want food all over the house, broken furniture, broken windows and dented heads.

Although - I do let both my kids jump on my bed for 10 minutes after bath time every night, so I must not be totally mean.
Lol, yes food is only eaten in the kitchen. I know what I clean up after they eat, whether it is a snack or meal and I can't imagine how nasty the carpet and couch would be if they could eat anywhere.
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Old 04-22-2013, 04:25 PM   #64
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Originally Posted by hilaryisinked
How do kids get their energy out on a rainy day if they can't run inside? Seems like they are just as likely to get hurt outside. If we are with someone who has a young baby I tell them not to run but other than that, our kids race doll strollers in the house and play tag. When it's raining we'll jog laps around the first floor. Seems like running outside is just as dangerous what with rocks, roots, and cement.

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My kids don't have to run around everyday. They just play.
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Old 04-22-2013, 04:29 PM   #65
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Originally Posted by hilaryisinked

My children are 1 and 3 and that age group has too much energy to just sit and color all day. I guess I don't respect my own home because I jog laps in it when it's raining outside or run the stairs for exercise?

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For some of us it is a respect thing. It isn't for you, no biggie what your expectations are in your home, but I do not allow my kids to run in my house or anyone else's house. We have a no running in the house rule and we expect guests to respect that. My kids have all been in that age group and have done fine with that rule.
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Old 04-22-2013, 04:33 PM   #66
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Thanks for all of you who chimed in for this question but why are we comparing if we are strict or not. These are the rules that work for your family so keep them even if I think they are strict or not.

It seems like this is some way to compare families and ways that some here and in real life are thinking they parent better than others.

I don't make my kids sit @ the table to eat. If they want to stand or eat in the kitchen instead of the table that is cool. I stand to eat sometimes as well. I don't want crumbs all over the house so I will ask them to eat over the table or something so the crumbs don't fall on the floor. I also don't want them eating in the living room or other parts of the house.

My kids can run in the house unless it is late or there is some reason for them not to run like I have something set up on the carpet. I also allow my kids to jump on our indoor trampoline, again don't jump on that if someone is sleeping and the jumping is making too much noise.

We have different rules depending on where we are. If someone doesn't want my kids to run in the house then fine my kids won't run. Another example we don't watch tv here but if they go to my mom's house and she is taking care of them she lets them watch tv. Again I am fine w/ that because she is watching them for free and her house her rules as far as the tv.

I guess my question is what is the point of this post? Do you want validation for what you are doing or if others told you you were strict would you want to make a change? I am not saying this in a rude way and I hope you don't take offense but I just wanted to understand this better.

I also wanted to say that I wouldn't have an issue w/ your rules if we were going to your house for a visit w/ my DDs.
What is the reason for your post? Trying to make the OP feel bad for asking if she is too strict? What does that matter? We all have rules or no rules and most adults can discuss this decently. Who cares if she wants validation. You can either respond or not. But what you did is uncalled for and childish.
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Old 04-22-2013, 04:57 PM   #67
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Re: Am I really that much stricter than other Moms?

Thank you ajane for sharing your thoughts. I am glad that you let me know that my post was uncalled for and childish because this will be a warning to me to be more careful in what I post and how I express myself. It is important that you had the guts to tell me because I wouldn't want to continue going around being rude to others.

The reason for my post is to understand why she was posting this. My hope is that you can help me better phase that so as not to be rude. I find that learning about where the question is coming from is just as important as the question itself. Please help me be polite about this ajane. I find when others come to DS for validation it doesn't completely happen. There maybe some who chime in to say right on sister and then a few very vocal ones who are negative (I guess you consider me one of those). It matters to me because I don't want that person going to bed thinking of the few people who said negative things and being upset (I guess that was me again). Sadly I would suggest not to come to DS for validation on certain topics (discipline, feeding your baby, vax and a few others).

I thought I responded to her question honestly and I thought I did it respectfully. I will reread my message and try to see how I went wrong as it was NOT my intent. I do have to learn from this experience.

I apologize to you ajane and more so to the OP. I will think very carefully next time I type a post and I will try to use gentle words. Sadly I hope we don't relate this to my upbringing and that my parents didn't do a good job of teaching me respect. All blame is to be laid on me because I am sure my parents and I would jump to say they did teach me respect.

Very sorry for my childishness : (
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Old 04-22-2013, 05:27 PM   #68
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Re: Am I really that much stricter than other Moms?

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Originally Posted by Fishie Kisses View Post
Yes/no ma'am/sir here too

Here too, same with most of the kids we are around. I never heard kids say it where I grew up in NY though. I thought it was mostly a southern thing. People in general are more polite down here. (IME)
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Old 04-22-2013, 06:43 PM   #69
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Re: Am I really that much stricter than other Moms?

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I'm just curious about these little towels. Who gets them out for him? Who makes sure they don't pile up all over the house? Who puts them in the laundry? Who washes them and puts them away?
I do I make sure he has clean ones everyday. ( I do laundry for all three of us) But he knows what to go look for and get if he needs one! One or two a day. They get put on the stairs at the end of the day to be brought up to the dirty laundry when we go up for the night.

It is weird I may not have these big rules but we have manners and a bunch of little rules believe me that's part of my therapy. My obsession with things being done a certain way and things in order. But I have to put a stop at basic physical needs that can't be fulfilled bc it is too cold outside. Running is a joy, inside or out as long as no one is getting hurt.

And to the toys on higher shelves my cousins kids have learned these rules as well and will ask and are so good at sharing and putting back these toys. This is bc we sit down with them and work through the play with them. My DS has a wild streak and my cousin daughter is a "princess" in training (result of other friends) but my DS is so sweet with
her.

I have to say I love kids, I have my DS and two other LO girls 2 and 4 and we all had a long great day of playing, things out a little crazy and I sent them all to the couch!! The oldest couldn't sit next to my DS bc he moved too much so she switched place with my cousins DD (she and DS have had a long relationship hehe being kids but have been together since babies!!) once the switch was made everyone settles to watch a movie. They were so sweet. It sometimes is just a matter of reading the children to see what they need.

I am the weirdest biggest weirdo ever!! hehe It is not that i am inconsistent but we have rules about manners and how to treat ppl but I feel my Ds needs a lot of physical outlet and I let him have it. If he would sit and colour for more than a few mins I would do it all day!! I have like 20 colouring books and preeschool, K ,1st grade workbooks ready for him to take an interest in but he doesn't he is physical!!

I would also like to add DS doesn't know what a toy gun is, a toy sword or any other weapons? We do firetrucks, police cars etc. One of his fireman came with a tool that looked like gun but wasn't. Not once did DS refer to it as a gun. Always a tool to help. We own real guns and do not want him to get confused or misunderstand the difference.

Ok maybe I have gne on too much but hopefully not too off topic?

I think LOVE should be the biggest and most important rule of the house.

EDIT: shoes get picked up and set upright after coming inside, sometimes my baby gets upset bc he isnt ready to come in but it is time to come in. If he doesn't set his boots up right away I tell him we will do it a bit later and within an hour when I ask him he will go out and set them upright. I don't want to stand over him and demand he do it. I am willing to let him work thru his feelings and revisit a situation to make it right.
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Old 04-22-2013, 06:45 PM   #70
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My kids run in the house. Yards are not big here, IF you have one. My kids are little and I love it when they chase eachother and fall over laughing. <3 they don't run at other people's homes though
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