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Old 04-23-2013, 06:36 PM   #1
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Worried about labor pain for baby #2

I'm at 38 weeks and getting really nervous about the pain to come. I was worried about it for DD too. But now I know just how painful it is, I'm really freaking myself out! Anyone else obsess over L&D pain?

It probably doesn't help that this babe is super active and pushing all over my abdomen which causes pressure and pain and reminds me of what's to come.

With DD I had IV pain medication that helped during labor but not delivery. I liked having a mostly natural birth and fast recovery (we were barely in the hospital 24 hours). The thought of an epideral freaks me out. Anyone have any suggestions or advice?

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Old 04-23-2013, 07:22 PM   #2
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Re: Worried about labor pain for baby #2

I was worried with my second pregnancy but once I went into labour, it all just faded away and I got right into the zone. DD's birth was a million times better than my experience with her brother. Maybe because I knew what I was doing and could focus better? I admit that I totally panicked with DS and just never got back into a good headspace. With DD, I was very tuned into the progress my body was making and never felt overwhelmed or like I couldn't do it.

So I don't have advice, really, but wanted to share my positive experience. Good luck!
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Old 04-24-2013, 02:08 AM   #3
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Re: Worried about labor pain for baby #2

I don't have advice or suggestions, only sympathy and understanding.

I am 37 weeks pregnant and am actually in therapy for it (which is not helping since she thinks I am too far along to actually address it properly). I realized I needed extra help during my pregnancy yoga classes. I would start to hyperventilate/go into panic mode anytime the teacher talked about contractions. I don't usually talk about it openly on the internet anymore, because I got tired of hearing how amazing homebirth is and "if you had only done xyz..." I did x, y, z and 1, 2, 3. My homebirth sucked, and I'm terrified of giving birth again because of it. I would love nothing more than to have an epidural this time, but the maternity system here just isn't set up to support it even though they are technically available. Not to mention I'm scared of those as well!

I will say, one thing that has helped slightly is hearing positive 2nd birth stories from all my girlfriends who have given birth recently. Not internet stories of pain-free, orgasmic births, but real stories from real people in my life, medicated or not.
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Old 04-24-2013, 02:40 AM   #4
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Re: Worried about labor pain for baby #2

The best advice I ever got is that it only gets as bad as the contraction you're having. Don't worry about all the pain that is to come (and with your second, you know EXACTLY what you're getting into). Also, like pp have said, once labor starts, it's easier to focus on getting through rather than the pain.

Yes, I was worried more with my second than my first.
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Old 04-24-2013, 05:34 AM   #5
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Re: Worried about labor pain for baby #2

Generally speaking, the second time around is easier than the first. You made it through the first one and you CAN DO IT! When you actually start experiencing the contractions, you'll see it.
Maybe, instead of getting stressed about the pain, focus your energy and attention on learning alternative coping methods. (laboring in the bath, using the shower, different positions, sterile water injections, etc. There are lots more.) You may or may not use them in labor, but I think it will help you to feel like you have some tools to deal with the contractions. Read some good natural birth books - I recommend Ina May Gaskin's "Ina May's Guide to Childbirth." It always helps me get in a better state of mind when anticipating birth. Your state of mind has a huge influence over how you will labor. Do your best to think of labor not as the upcoming "day of torture", but as the marathon you're going to run with a wonderful prize at the end. And you are totally equipped to run this race. Your body knows what to do, and you can do it! It's going to be tough sometimes, sure, but you'll make it.
Think of the contractions as waves - they come in, they break over you, and then, they RECEDE! It won't last forever. Take a deep breath and let it go. Rest for a minute and breathe, and then you'll find the strength for the next one.
Have someone with you who is a REAL support to you. Someone who can help you stay calm, and remind you that you are OK and you can do it. Your husband may or may not be up to the task. Maybe see if you can get a doula yet - I've heard nothing but good from those who have had one.
All the best for a lovely birth when the day arrives!
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Old 04-24-2013, 06:20 AM   #6
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Re: Worried about labor pain for baby #2

Look into meditation or relaxation methods. The best way to reduce the pain is to relax.
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Old 04-24-2013, 07:00 AM   #7
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Re: Worried about labor pain for baby #2

I was very nervous for dd2. I just had her April 12. My first dd has been an induction for pre e at 37 weeks and I did it without any pain meds or epidural. But it was really rough. I couldn't even think about the pain of labor and delivery for months after without getting lightheaded!! With dd2, I read hypno birthing and practiced relaxing (really only practiced a couple times at the very end so it's not too late for you). I ate right and exercised throughout pregnancy. I taught my dh the things I would need during labor (especially encouraging words), I found an OB I trust, and planned a hospital water birth. When labor started, I practiced relaxing through contractions. When they got painful, I would say to myself "you are a strong woman of strong mind and strong body. You can do this". I didn't go into the hospital til late and was only there 59minutes before dd was born. During transition I layed on my side with my iPod earphones in and just focused inward. I would relax and just let the pain take over. When I got in the tub I was already ready to push and dd was out in 3 pushes. The nurse delivered her since the OB didn't make it in time. I had no tears or repairs and felt great! After a couple days I don't even remember the pain and am more than willing to do it again. It was such a different experience than dd1! I highly recommend practicing some relaxation and have a positive mantra to repeat to yourself or have someone there to tell you. Good luck mama. You can do this! You have done it before and have prepared 9 months for it. It is the big race at the end of your training.
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Old 04-24-2013, 09:12 AM   #8
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Re: Worried about labor pain for baby #2

I absolutely agree with the previous poster about the second time being easier. My first birth was rotten but my second was so easy. I didn't think I was that far in labor and by the time I started to feel the contractions ( as in oh I feel these for sure ) i got to the hospital and was complete and ready to push.

My personal focus during contractions is going up and down a hill- sounds kinda silly but it worked for me. Breathe in and I rode up a hill, breathe out and I went down until the contraction was over. I have also heard of other peoples focus of being an ice cube that melts into a puddle and then reforms into the ice cube.
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Old 04-24-2013, 09:18 AM   #9
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Re: Worried about labor pain for baby #2

I would say the biggest thing is to stop worrying! Fear and stress will only make things worse. If you don't want an epidural, you need to prepare yourself. Read birth stories, study up on ways to relieve the pain naturally, figure out now things that help you relax. My mom always said pitching a fit only makes things worse, and that was the number one thing that helped me in my natural labor. Yeah, it hurt, but choosing to be positive, thankful, and focusing on my DH helped so much. The worst times were the moments I let myself slip into the panicky, omg omg I can't do this feeling. When I remembered to breathe, picture my baby, look into my DH's eyes, that was when I felt on top of things. Hope you find some ways to relax and have a great birth!
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Old 04-25-2013, 12:12 PM   #10
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Re: Worried about labor pain for baby #2

Has anyone opted for an epideral for subsequent pregnancies? They offered it to me last time and I declined, but I don't know if I would say no again.
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