Reply Hey Mom! Learn more about the Gerber Life Insurance Grow-Up Plan!
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 07-02-2013, 01:43 AM   #11
Kalohabreeze's Avatar
Kalohabreeze
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Alabama
Posts: 877
My Mood:
Re: Miscarriage at 7 weeks ( trigger warning loss mentioned)

Thank you all so much your words truly mean so much to me. I'm currently searching for a new OBGYN after 3 kids with the same dude it's going to be difficult to switch just out f familiarity but his distance and lack of understanding was too much for me to just gloss over .

I'm really wanting answers and maybe I can get some after my next blood test, and a consult with another doctor.

Intellectually I know something was probably wrong with the baby but in the back of my mind I can't help but wonder if it was me. I was dieting , nursing , at lunch meat cold and had a piña colada before I found out I was pregnant ... Any number of those things could have done something to it ... I'm just left feeling like I did this to myself and my body failed me.

Advertisement

__________________
Proud breastfeeding ,babywearing ,cloth diapering, co sleeping Peace loving Hippie Mama to my sweet Buddha Babies
8.28.06 9.15.08 and 9.23.12 Feb 14th 2014 June 17 2014
Lillarose Consultant
Kalohabreeze is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-02-2013, 05:50 AM   #12
miriamleigh
Registered Users
 
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 1,297
Re: Miscarriage at 7 weeks ( trigger warning loss mentioned)

Oh honey, NO! You did not cause your miscarriage. It takes a lot more than a piña colada, lunch meats, and breasrfeeding to cause a miscarriage. Honestly, I think the only way a woman can do that is by taking heavy duty pharmaceuticals, or mega doses of certain vitamins, and possibly cocktails of herbs. No, you and all the other women who have been through this did not cause it.
miriamleigh is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-02-2013, 07:57 AM   #13
lynn97's Avatar
lynn97
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 6,302
My Mood:
Quote:
Originally Posted by miriamleigh
Oh honey, NO! You did not cause your miscarriage. It takes a lot more than a piña colada, lunch meats, and breasrfeeding to cause a miscarriage. Honestly, I think the only way a woman can do that is by taking heavy duty pharmaceuticals, or mega doses of certain vitamins, and possibly cocktails of herbs. No, you and all the other women who have been through this did not cause it.
Agreed.

Sent from my iPhone using DS Forum
lynn97 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-02-2013, 08:04 AM   #14
mibarra
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 8,975
I agree. I had a miscarriage in my 3rd pregnancy. Got pregnant for the 4th time within 2 cycles after my cycle returned. I'm currently holding that baby in my arms. These things happen (not comforting, I know), and doesn't necessarily mean there's something "wrong", KWIM?
mibarra is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-02-2013, 08:28 AM   #15
JasmineMama's Avatar
JasmineMama
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 1,076
My Mood:
Re: Miscarriage at 7 weeks ( trigger warning loss mentioned)

I had two early losses after two uneventful pregnancies. It was really hard. Especially the first because I never believed it could happen to me (naive I know). My DH said the right things but I could tell he didn't really "get it." But he did then remember when the baby would have been due and took me out to eat to cheer me up so maybe it just takes longer for guys to process?

You didn't do this (again, I beat myself up for cleaning a unventilated room with clorox and moving heavy things and changing the cat box before I knew). Not that it makes it better but as PP have said that combo of egg and sperm just wasn't right together.

Do something nice for yourself (maybe a spa day) and tell yourself everyday that you aren't broken, your body knows just what to do in a pregnancy, and you will have another healthy baby.
__________________
Mr. Man (8/09) , Little guy (6/11) and my little girl (1/14) missing my little beans (10/12) (03/13)
JasmineMama is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-02-2013, 07:37 PM   #16
themaelane's Avatar
themaelane
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Virginia
Posts: 845
My Mood:
The above women are all right. I think sometimes emotionally I still blame myself when I know logically I did nothing wrong. I still mourn that baby. I hope you are able to find the support and doc you need. I'm glad you are looking for another practice where you will be more comfortable. Hugs.
__________________
I'm one happy and hopeful, crazy mom and wife to the best DH ever.
My DD: ever-moving, always-stubborn, my sweet pea, born 8/09.
Coming in November: A new baby!!
ISO: NB covers/fitteds, flats, wool, 'big sister' stuff for a 4YO girl.
themaelane is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-02-2013, 07:50 PM   #17
Ellasundies
Registered Users
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 1,262
Re: Miscarriage at 7 weeks ( trigger warning loss mentioned)

I just wanted to offer (((hugs))). After my miscarriage, NO ONE in my family was helpful. No one said the right things and the majority of the things were in actuality very hurtful to me. While I was (am) healing from the miscarriage I came across a list of things NOT to say to a women who miscarried and every single one of them had been said to me. I tried telling everyone I was close to in hopes of getting some support but they were all just horrible. And I DON'T get offended easily either.

My DH totally didn't get it either. I still don't think he does. And my doctor was horrible. After they were horrible-negligent really- they even asked me to participate in a study they were conducting for women who had a hard time maintaining pregnancy. Oy it never ended.

My advice to you is to talk to the people who are supportive to you and ignore the rest. I had even stopped talking to my DH for a little while, not in anger or anything but just to keep away from negativity and hurtfulness and it really helped.
Ellasundies is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-02-2013, 08:19 PM   #18
mibarra
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 8,975
My mom had trouble hiding her relief/happiness at my miscarriage. Her sympathy was lukewarm at best. SHE wasn't ready for us to have another baby, when I told her I was pregnant she said "I thought you were waiting longer?!?! .... I guess I'm happy if you're happy".... bleh....

People don't know what to say. Be sad when you need to be sad. Do what you have to do to move forward. Be happy when you feel happy. Its all OK to feel.
mibarra is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-03-2013, 10:43 AM   #19
bazil323's Avatar
bazil323
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Cameron, WI
Posts: 170
My Mood:
Re: Miscarriage at 7 weeks ( trigger warning loss mentioned)

I'm so sorry for your loss! It is one of the hardest things to deal with in life, not the least of which is because so many people (sometimes even those who have experienced it themselves) just don't know how to support you or don't realize that you need support.

My first pregnancy was a "chemical pregnancy" which just means that it was so early that the only way to detect it was the chemical reaction of a pregnancy test and nothing would have shown on an ultrasound. I would have been about 3-1/2 to 4 weeks, technically still before my period would have been due (was having irregular periods but based on ovulation date period was due the day I started the miscarriage). The test was so light that I didn't trust it/believe it at first, and then when my symptoms started going away the same day, I think I somehow knew that it was not going to last. Still, that didn't make it any easier, and I kept thinking about all the things that might have caused it to go wrong.

Like you, I know that the likelihood was that there was something wrong with the baby, but it still hurts and I still wonder what that pregnancy & baby would be like. I got pregnant with the next cycle and am now a little over 21 weeks, so I think that helped me heal and move past it a little sooner, although I did worry more about this pregnancy than I think I would have had the miscarriage not happened.
bazil323 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Copyright © 2005 - 2014 Escalate Media. All Rights Reserved.