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Old 07-06-2013, 08:09 AM   #11
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Re: When Did You Tell?

Told very close family and two friends right away. Kept it secret for 2 more weeks from coworkers, until I got sick at work and was forced to tell. I usually have HG and I knew anyone that saw me on a regular basis would know early, but, I'm actually not that sick this time! Honestly have no intention to make any "big" announcement on facebook. Thinking about keeping it secret until 15-20 weeks, and when it is no longer "secret" I'll just start to non chalantly mentioning it.

I bled with my second. I sincerely thought I was miscarrying. A friend could only say "that sucks... blah, blah, blah, blah about her own stupid personal problems". So even though she is going to be offended she wasn't one of the first ones to know, I'm specifically keeping it a secret from her until after 12 weeks because if I did miscarry, I don't even want her knowing. That, and I don't want her going out and getting purposely pregnant just so she'd be pregnant with me like she did when I was pregnant with my now 14month old.


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Old 07-06-2013, 08:17 AM   #12
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We've told immediate family and a few close friends as soon as we had a positive hpt with all three pregnancies. We miscarried our first at 10 weeks, and hadn't told anyone else yet, but my DH told a bunch of people about the miscarriage. We got pregnant a few weeks later with DS and when people asked how I was dealing with the miscarriage DH would tell them I was pregnant again. So a lot of people knew by the time I was 8 weeks. We announced on Facebook at 13 weeks.
This time around it got announced accidentally to a group of 40 people at church by our senior minister (hubby is the associate/youth minister so they work together). Word spread pretty quickly but was still kept pretty quiet. Then it got announced accidentally to the whole church of 400 people on Mother's Day at 8 weeks by our children's minister. So pretty much everyone knew. I still haven't made a Facebook announcement this time, and I'm almost 16 weeks. I figure I'll tell Facebook at 20 weeks when we have our gender scan.

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Old 07-06-2013, 08:42 AM   #13
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Re: When Did You Tell?

With my first 2 children we told everyone right away. With my last child we told family at around 8 weeks. Everyone else figured out I was pregnant and just getting really fat around 6-8 months. I had someone (I know) ask if I was pregnant at 8 months. So, 2 weeks before I was due.
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Old 07-06-2013, 02:48 PM   #14
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I told friends and family right away. I planned on waiting to tell the 'public' at about 12 weeks. I couldn't wait and told everyone at 4 weeks.
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Old 07-07-2013, 11:36 AM   #15
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I don't think I'll ever announce it on Facebook. Just one day there will be pictures of a baby. All the people I love I have told personally.
Of all the words of mice and men, the saddest of these are might have been.
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Old 07-07-2013, 11:38 AM   #16
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Re: When Did You Tell?

We announced it at 12ish weeks.
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Old 07-07-2013, 12:23 PM   #17
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Re: When Did You Tell?

With DD we told our family and one close friend right away and told everyone else at 12 weeks. This time we told the same people right away but we're struggling with when to tell everyone else. I'm 12 weeks now but this time I'm seeing a midwife for my care and I'm not having any ultrasounds or using a Doppler and it was too early to hear the heartbeat with a fetoscope so I kind of want to wait until we hear the heartbeat, hopefully at the next appt.
Happily married to M (8.30.09) who treats me like a queen!
EBFing . CSing . BWing . ECing . CDing . APing
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Old 07-07-2013, 10:38 PM   #18
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With our first we didn't tell anyone until around 13 weeks. With our second, there were some concerns so we told family around 14 weeks and friends slightly later and then miscarried shortly after. If we ever get pregnant again I'm not sure what we'll decide to do.
Mama to H (10.2010), H (03.2013) - our 15wk little guy born too soon, and looking forward to our rainbow due 05.2014. It's a boy!
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Old 07-08-2013, 08:09 AM   #19
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Re: When Did You Tell?

I knew when we started trying that I didn't want a ton of people asking me about it and then losing the baby, so I researched when it was relatively safe to assume the pregnancy would probably continue. Everything I read said the miscarriage rate dropped to less than 5% once they can see a heartbeat, so I told DH that we would wait until then (whether the clinic got me in at 6-7 weeks or waited until later to do an ultrasound). In some ways I was glad I had already decided that because we lost my first pregnancy just a few days after the first positive HPT, though I think in my heart I knew that it was not to be because I just didn't trust it (test was sooo light and then then symptoms were disappearing).

In other ways, I wished I had at least told my mom because it was so hard to deal with that loss basically alone. DH was sad too, but he just did not understand and didn't really comprehend that it was a real pregnancy because it was so early. I think my mom would have understood because she had a miscarriage before she had me. We still kept it a secret, though.

We started trying again, or at least not preventing, with the next ovulation, and I got pregnant right away. While I was more cautious about trusting the pregnancy, it just felt more sure that it was going to stick even though I had over 6 days of spotting (and most of that bright red spotting) because my symptoms never went away that time, and the spotting stayed really light. So again, I said we should wait until we see a heartbeat. We were fortunate to get an ultrasound at just over 7 weeks and saw that beautiful heartbeat. I don't think I could have contained DH any longer, so I gave the go ahead to tell people. By the next day, a lot of people knew, so within the week I casually posted something with a reference to being pregs on FB.

So for me it was about 7 weeks after seeing the heartbeat.
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Old 07-08-2013, 08:21 AM   #20
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Re: When Did You Tell?

Right away with baby 1,2 and 3. Baby four was a miscarriage that we were going to surprise everyone with so no one knew until after missed miscarriage at 12 wks. Baby 5 I told right away and now that I am pregnant with number 6 we are trying to keep it a secret till 12 weeks. I have a clever way of revealing so we want to wait.
~Whitney~ adoring wife to Chris, mama to five little minions, Alex, Destiny, Kairi, Amelia and Cassandra!
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