Kids and clothes, what would you do?

[1bigfamily]

Originally Posted by amanda1188 Really it all depends on how well you know your child and sometimes goth is nothing more than a "clothing style". Just my .

I agree and you do have to know your child to know the diference. DH and I definitely draw the line at the revealing clothing. DD age 7 is already talking about the "popular" look, which consists of barely any clothing. We forbid it and help her dress how she wants but with everything appropriately covered. It takes some looking but it has worked for the most part.

[bellsmom]

Originally Posted by jennyofthemoon I recently ran a booth at a career fair at a local high school, and I could NOT get over the jeans the guys wore. Seriously, it was just WEIRD. But whatever...onto the goth thing. We have a new family tha just moved in two doors up. Their older dd is 16, she dresseed in ALL black, I mean ALL black. The little kids on the street thing she is bizaree, but she is the NICEST 16 year old girl I have met in a LONG time. The funniest part is she is always teellign me how much she likes my cloths,, and I wear mostly pink and purple My kids are little now, and I let them dress however they want. MY 3 1/2 yo always has on a dress with legs that don't match lol my son always looks flaming gay (at 5 whatever...seirously, think drag queen here lol) and my 7 yo thinks the more skin showing the better. But they wear what they like. Personally, I think that clothing is just clothing, and whatever they like is fine...I really dislike when people automatically assume they know everything about you based on how you dress, but I also hope that my children will choose kind, open-minded people to befriend that will get to know the "real" people under the clothes, regardless of if they wear leather and chains or a potato sack.

Agreed!!! I don't have a son who dresses in drag, but if I did I wouldn't care and then I would have someone to go the theater with instead of all sporting events I do find it quite funny that people who dress alternative hate preps. I wore black in high school and I loved to dye my hair, but I was also a cheerleader and the homecoming queen because I was NICE!! What else are you gonna be when you are short and blond. It is called genetics! Not all people that wear preppy clothes drive a beamer and hate freaks!!! I have a good friend who is quite alternative. She hates preppy clothes and that is fine by me, but I tell you what I wear those clothes and I am one of her most loyal friends and supporters and she would tell you the same thing! We get along great eventhough we look and dress completely different because enlightenment is not something you get by how you dress it is something you show by your actions. The next time you see someone and begin to judge them by their clothing, money, or tattoo stop to think. They may be a diaperswappers mama!

The only thing that I don't like seeing is girls flaunting their sexuality when they are too young to know better. It makes me sad because I wish they knew they were more than a piece of _ss! I don't judge them though because I think it is very telling of our society and what we value. We don't expect enough of our young men and we teach our girls that they need to be beautiful and sexual in order to be worthy!

[bellsmom]

I forgot to add that at a local high school some boys tried to get the dress code changed because the girls who don't wear enough clothing were distracting in class. I thought that was pretty interesting.

[mommypooh]

My theroy is fine if that is how you want to dress you can buy the clothes. I am not going to buy you certain clothes so you can look like a group of people. I am goign to continue to buy what I have been buying which would be a wide selection of clothes. Nothing too short, nothing hanging off, I am going to buy nice clothes. If my child wants to buy different clothes for themselves then so be it. But I went through so many pahses in middle and high school that I am not going to fund every single one of them. I was goth, I was prep, I was long skirts and prude clothes, I was skater, I was slut, you name it I did it. You know what I did based on who I was dating and who my friends were, I don't want my kids to feel like they have to dress like everyone else, I want them to be their own person and dress in what they like.

[pfratz]

I wouldn't care what my kids wear, as long as everything is covered as it should be.

[monkeylove]

IMO fighting your kids choices just make them want it more, or at least that's hoe I was with my parents. I think we all have the right to express ourselves in the ways we feel most comfortable.

[bsydprmkn]

im glad i was allowed to dress the way i wanted to in high school. i had alot of freedom to do whatever i wanted to do really. i remember for one year i dyed my hair green for pattys day... and it stayed for 2 months! so im all for my kids dressing and wearing their hair however they choose. dh on the other hand is all about dd in dresses with her hair long, and ds with trim haircut with sports clothing on....GAG!

[AttachedMama]

I didn't have children so that they would be who *I* want them to be, or who *I* want them to look like, so no. I love that they're both so different from each other and really express who and what THEY like. Well, not the baby..she's a little young As long as there are no underwear showing and everything is covered up enough to ensure that, it's all good!

When I was in middle school I wore all black. It wasn't really called goth then, but my mom did the whole freaking out, thinking I worshipped the devil. One day I came home from school and she showed me a video of a Geraldo show where he had "devil worshipping teens" as guests. She called all my friends' parents to show them the tape too because she just KNEW that's what we were doing. She made my life miserable with that because it wasn't the case at all. I wasn't depressed either. It was what I thought looked cool. I was young and trying to find a style I felt most comfortable in.

By the end up middle school I had discovered punk music and had pierced my nose in my friend's bedroom. My mom almost fainted. I ended up shaving most of my head at one point (and gave DH his first mohawk). The hair I did have was dyed any color I could find, a wore boots and ratty clothes. It didn't change the person I was AT ALL. Everyone said I'd grow out of it, which made me laugh. Guess what..I did. No one that knows me now can imagine me dressing like that. I never hurt anyone and wasn't out doing drugs. Actually, when your look draws attention to yourself, you can't get away with the things the more "normal" looking kids can because so many people are watching you, waiting for you to mess up!

So yeah, I don't care if my DS comes out of his bedroom wearing a bright pink tutu and glitter, or if he comes out in all black. Hasn't happened yet, but he does wear things I don't think look the greatest. He does like wearing a lot of black and band t-shirts, wristbands, and chains. Next year he could be completely different, and I look forward to that. DD is a total girly girl right now. Will she be next year? I can't wait to find out. I love watching how they change as they grow and try to find who they are. It's part of life.

[GrowingUpMad]

Originally Posted by ZooCrew10 I know, isn't that funny about the preppy thing? I'm that way with the preppy cheer leader thing. BLECH.

I just had to let everyone know that in school I was that "preppy cheerleader thing" I had a riot and loved every minute of school because I was so involved. I was at every pep rally, cheering for our teams, attending all the functions and loved it. I wore khaki a lot, argyle was cool too, loved penny loafers and knee socks. Pastel button downs with little skirts and a vest over it was too darling. Sorry I am so preppy.

For my kids I hope and pray that my dd's are cheerleaders (and dh knows I feel this way) and enjoy school as much as I did (not saying goths didn't ~ no first hand expierence there). While I don't care how they (ds or dd's) dress I do believe appearence is VERY important so if they choose to be goth, punk, preppy, skater or whatever their clothes will fit, be clean and neat. I provide the $$ to shop so if they must have clothes that fall off their a@@ they have to find a way to buy it themselves. I went through a brief piercing stage which I also loved but I did wait until I was over 18 to pierce anything and I expect my children to also wait until they are adults to tattoo or pierce anything.

For now my son is 11 1/2 and a VERY preppy dresser, I love it. He likes short hair and nice fitting clothing. My dd is nearly 4 and still dresses as I wish her too. She loves dresses though and it a very outgoing girlie girl. DD #2 is still in utero so she obviously prefers the all natural way of dressing

[Five Green Beans]

I was very invloved in school, and was not the least bit preppy but I didnt dress like any of my "click" either. I was then, am now, always will be a hippy. My dd's dress similar to me we are all about comfort my oldest loves long boho type skirts with tanks. My 4 yr old loves any dress that is long and makes a good spin, out side though she wears jeans and tanks (she falls to much, needs pants) the baby well she is pretty much in diapers 99% of the time I acutally only own 3 outfits that fit her right now, but we dont go out much at all. I let them devlop there own style BUT i will not let them dress sleezey when there teens, nor will there be any ear piercing or make up wearing. but clothing wise so long as your coverd and they not wearing a offensive expression or logo on a tee it will be ok with us.

ETA: my dh wears shorts and black tees all year round, he will put pants on to shovel snow and come back in put shorts on and leave. People look at him like he is crazy but he HATES pants, he only has to wear them one day a week at work, or else I think he would find a job where he could wear shorts, lol