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Old 02-19-2014, 09:08 PM   #11
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Re: Six year age gap

Thank you ladies!!!! All the stories you can share about that age range is greatly appreciated. This was not my dream age gap. I always thought I wanted kids close together. We tried hard to give that to our children but our life did not turn out that way. I need to know how bigger age ranges can be great too!!

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Originally Posted by MDever View Post
We have had both tightly spaced and a larger gap. I always used to think that I wanted them all close together but you know there is something amazingly precious about seeing older children with their baby sibling. Your family has been through so very much I have been following your post for ages and if it isn't too forward to say so I truly believe you would be making the best possible decision for your son by letting Spiderman go. I can't imagine your heartbreak after Abby and now this. You have such a loving spirit and I hope that you are able to complete your family in a peaceful way that is healthy both emotionally and physically for everyone.
Opinions are more than welcome on the subject. We are equally wanting to give up as we are wanting to continue. This has become the hardest choice we have ever made. There were no real choices to be made previously. In losing our first two children it was not hard to put my life on the line. It was not hard to know what I wanted to do. This is hard. This is the hardest choice I've had to make.

Now DS says things like "mommy I good" because hes scared of getting in trouble for being "bad".(Just to be clear we do not say Spider-Man is bad, ever. We say he makes bad choices. As in "Spider-Man that was a bad choice") Spider-man hurts DS and has to go to bed and DS says "Spider-Man be good? Spider-man play with me?" I reached for DS today and he flinched just a little. I have never seen him do this before. I assume its from Spider-man being so aggressive with him. I cried after seeing this today. Today has been a really bad day................. An irreverent add on to my bad day. between this initial post and my post now I fell down my neighbors stairs. It really hurts. agh Hurt my butt, back and neck. agh agh agh What a day...

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Old 02-20-2014, 07:42 AM   #12
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Re: Six year age gap

My second and third are almost 6 years apart. It was a case of the oopsies. LOL The two of them cannot leave each other alone. You would think that with there being so many years separated plus being different genders would negate any fighting but that is not so.

The only issue for us was that we quickly forgot how much time and effort having a little baby requires. But we remembered and got with the program.

I think separation of years matters less than how personalities connect.
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Old 02-20-2014, 07:49 AM   #13
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Dh thought he was done after #2. Then changed his mind. There is 5 years between 2 and 3. They are all close. My 13yo hangs out and goes places with my 18yo when she is here. They like going together places. The age difference doesn't matter to them.

Same with 1 and 3. There is 7 years between them. They talk and text daily. (Oldest is married and not here.)

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Old 02-20-2014, 08:10 AM   #14
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Ds1 is 8 and ds2 is 2, so they are 6 yrs apart. It was easier when ds2 was a newborn as ds1 was independent and didn't need much help. Plus he was in school, so i didn't have to worry about keeping him entertained all day. Ds1 was super helpful and was really understanding if i couldn't do what he wanted right away.
The drawback was going back to diapers. I had gotten used to ds1 being party trained and it was an adjustment going back.
They play very well together too.
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Old 02-22-2014, 10:14 AM   #15
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Re: Six year age gap

I don't think the baby adjustment will be hard. I still take care of my niece and nephew who are babies. I have babies here a few times a week. I also adore the baby stage. Add that to what we have gone through to have a baby. To have a healthy baby I would be on cloud nine.

It is so great to hear that they can still be close even if they are not close in age. I have five older siblings but we were all born in pairs of two being close in age than a gap. Growing up I was closest to my closest age sibling. As adults I'm closest still to my closest age sibling and my sister who is seven years older.
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Old 02-22-2014, 10:40 AM   #16
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I am closest to my brother who is 6 yrs older than i.
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Old 02-22-2014, 11:39 AM   #17
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Re: Six year age gap

They feed off of each other? DD1 just turned one and oldest turning 7 next month. But gosh...two girls...wow In a way DD1 helps out and watches out for DD2 being the big sister. She's learning but they're great all around
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Old 02-22-2014, 04:39 PM   #18
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Re: Six year age gap

My girls are 7.5 years apart with no middle siblings. It wasn't planned that way I had 3 miscarriages between the two. However while it was a sad journey getting here it has been a blessing ever since. The girls are pretty much the best of friends. My oldest mourned her other siblings early passing right along with me/DH and celebrated her sisters birth. Our youngest sees her big sister as the coolest thing on the planet (next to mom ) and my oldest is jsut soo proud and shows off her little sister when ever she can. Now don't get me wrong they have their moments and all but mostly the relationship been as strong as I could ever hope for.

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Old 02-22-2014, 07:05 PM   #19
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My girls are 6year apart the oldest is 7 and the youngest will be 1 in May. They get along great, the oldest gets jealous once in a while but she is used to having all of our attention and since the baby nurses and sleeps with me she feels left out. They both adore each other to pieces though and I am she they will always be close. The oldest feels very important helping with the baby and sometimes loves on her too much.
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Old 02-22-2014, 07:12 PM   #20
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My sister and I are six years apart and we are my parents only children. My mom says she thought it was a great gap. I had a poor reaction to it (i am the older one) and to this day am not very close to my sister. I like her, I'm just not close to her. Still, I think it's better to have her than to not have her? It's less pressure on me to be everything my parents hoped for.

I might just have had a bad personality to mix with a six year gap. I have a friend who is 5 years older than her sis and they are much closer than my sister and me. She took care of her younger sis a lot whereas I spent most of my time being jealous and wishing I were still an only child.
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