Reply Hey Mom! Learn more about the Gerber Life Insurance Grow-Up Plan!
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 07-21-2014, 06:07 PM   #1
erlyjo's Avatar
erlyjo
User requested temporary ban
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: CO
Posts: 2,808
My Mood:
About ready to give up

I think I may just give up. My kids don't respect me, they don't listen to me, lessons are a fight and I think the stress of this is going to give me a coronary!

Has anyone else experienced this? Did you cave and send them to school? If not, how did you get through it? HELP!!!

Advertisement

__________________
Erica, Catholic homeschooling mama of 4 sweet kiddos!
If I owe you feedback, please let me know!
erlyjo is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-21-2014, 08:03 PM   #2
keysersoze's Avatar
keysersoze
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: with three little monkeys
Posts: 1,077
My Mood:
How old are they? What methods have you tried? If they were in school at one point, did you give them time to "deschool"?
__________________
SAHD to J 12.27.05, M 12.27.08, and A 2.15.11.
keysersoze is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-21-2014, 08:34 PM   #3
tallanvor
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Oklahoma
Posts: 13,361
Re: About ready to give up

Are you teaching to their learning styles? Have you asked their input on what they learn? Do you set clear goals and consequences, and are you consistent with the consequences (good and bad)?
tallanvor is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-21-2014, 08:53 PM   #4
erlyjo's Avatar
erlyjo
User requested temporary ban
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: CO
Posts: 2,808
My Mood:
Quote:
Originally Posted by keysersoze
How old are they? What methods have you tried? If they were in school at one point, did you give them time to "deschool"?
11 year old is the worst. Have tried everything. We deschooled when we pulled her out in second grade for a year. She does not want to get back into anything.
__________________
Erica, Catholic homeschooling mama of 4 sweet kiddos!
If I owe you feedback, please let me know!
erlyjo is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-21-2014, 08:58 PM   #5
erlyjo's Avatar
erlyjo
User requested temporary ban
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: CO
Posts: 2,808
My Mood:
Quote:
Originally Posted by tallanvor
Are you teaching to their learning styles? Have you asked their input on what they learn? Do you set clear goals and consequences, and are you consistent with the consequences (good and bad)?
Trying my best to teach to learning styles. They hate workbooks and writing, so that is bare bones, we read a lot which they like. If it were up to them they would so nothing at all though. DD constantly tells me how much she hates school and how stupid learning is. Not self motivated AT ALL. Very clear goals and consequences. She doesn't care.

Math is the big struggle right now. I tried a manipulative based program since I know they don't like workbooks, and it was a disaster, as in a complete waste of a year. Instead of listening and following along, they just played and built with the manipulatives. So this year we tried Saxon. Not going well at all. Now we are a full 2 years behind in math and I see no way of catching up at the current rate. I'm almost scared to send her back to school because she is SO far behind. I'm at a loss.
__________________
Erica, Catholic homeschooling mama of 4 sweet kiddos!
If I owe you feedback, please let me know!
erlyjo is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-21-2014, 09:02 PM   #6
Hitchkids
Registered Users
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 1,219
Re: About ready to give up

This is not a schooling issue. And putting them back into school would in many ways make it worse. You'd still have to deal with the lack of respect, attitude, etc but you'd also have to fight them on homework and such things.

The best advice I was given when dealing with a similar issue was to take some time and put the books away. Don't focus on school at all for a while. Instead, focus on discipline issues and healing the discord in your family. Yes, I tried the changing the style of teaching, making sure I was teaching to their learning styles, etc, etc. In the end I had to take some time to focus on discipline first.

Since you are Catholic, I will suggest maybe spending sometime reading the support pages at chcweb.com. Not that they aren't helpful for anyone but I just don't want anyone else to be offended by the Catholic theology. They cover just this subject in a few different sections.

And you sound rather burned out. I know it's hard with little ones but can you get some time for a Mom break? Adoration if you get something from that or have it in your area? I hope you are able to see some progress in the next few weeks but I will warn that it typically gets worse before getting better because kids like to push and push and push and see if they can get Mom to give up and back down. I'm pretty much recently coming out of this phase and there is a light at the end of the tunnel, I promise.
Hitchkids is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-21-2014, 09:25 PM   #7
erlyjo's Avatar
erlyjo
User requested temporary ban
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: CO
Posts: 2,808
My Mood:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hitchkids
This is not a schooling issue. And putting them back into school would in many ways make it worse. You'd still have to deal with the lack of respect, attitude, etc but you'd also have to fight them on homework and such things. The best advice I was given when dealing with a similar issue was to take some time and put the books away. Don't focus on school at all for a while. Instead, focus on discipline issues and healing the discord in your family. Yes, I tried the changing the style of teaching, making sure I was teaching to their learning styles, etc, etc. In the end I had to take some time to focus on discipline first. Since you are Catholic, I will suggest maybe spending sometime reading the support pages at chcweb.com. Not that they aren't helpful for anyone but I just don't want anyone else to be offended by the Catholic theology. They cover just this subject in a few different sections. And you sound rather burned out. I know it's hard with little ones but can you get some time for a Mom break? Adoration if you get something from that or have it in your area? I hope you are able to see some progress in the next few weeks but I will warn that it typically gets worse before getting better because kids like to push and push and push and see if they can get Mom to give up and back down. I'm pretty much recently coming out of this phase and there is a light at the end of the tunnel, I promise.
Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU for this advice! I'm in tears (and I don't think it's pregnancy hormones!). I had never thought to check the chc pages for anything like this.

I do go to adoration every other week, but maybe I need to do more. I used to be involved in a bunch of moms groups, but gave most of that up to focus on homeschooling. I have been suffering major burnout, and been feeling quite a bit of fear and stress at the thought of adding to our brood come December with the state of things the way they have been.
__________________
Erica, Catholic homeschooling mama of 4 sweet kiddos!
If I owe you feedback, please let me know!
erlyjo is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-21-2014, 09:27 PM   #8
missydawn's Avatar
missydawn
Senior Moderator
sitesupporter
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: NE Ohio
Posts: 7,069
Re: About ready to give up

I have to agree I think this not a homeschooling thing but more a behavior thing. We just did a year of ps after hs and there was just as much work for me to do with them in ps as there was in hs. I hated them coming home after being in school all day to have another two hours of homework when they were tired and done with work.
__________________
Missy
mama of 4
Get $10 at threadUP with me - great, cheap clothes
missydawn is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 07-22-2014, 06:16 AM   #9
Hitchkids
Registered Users
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 1,219
Re: About ready to give up

I think I have that fear almost every single time we add a new one to the family. I get overwhelmed and think what on earth were we thinking having a new baby when we are clearly have trouble handling the ones we have now. And yet, it almost always is smooth sailing once the baby is born. Not always but usually. We are expecting a new one in September and I can totally relate to those feelings. They are normal. But I'm sure you can get through them. Please know that I will be praying for you and your family over the next few weeks and maybe you can do the same for us. It's not an easy road you've chosen but we've found it to be worth it. Even the days Mom wants to throw in the towel.
Hitchkids is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-2014, 10:50 AM   #10
bruenderbaby's Avatar
bruenderbaby
Registered Users
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Westminster, CA
Posts: 238
My Mood:
Re: About ready to give up

I agree with all of the previous posts. They have given some great suggestions! I also found the book "Catholic Home Schooling" by Dr. Mary Kay Clark extremely helpful. I got a used copy for cheap thru Amazon. It not only addresses the discipline issue, it goes into detail about our rights as parents to home school our children. It really reaffirmed to me that we are making the very best decision to raise successful children/adults for this life, but especially for the next, by home schooling. After all, isn't Heaven the ultimate goal?

God Bless and keep those prayers going to Our Lord and our Blessed Mother (also a homeschooling mom). I will keep you in my prayers. Please do the same for me and my family, since I am due any day now with #4 (oldest is 5 and starting K) and wondering myself 'how in the world am I going to get this to work?'! With God's Grace EVERYTHING is possible!
__________________
Kristen; traditional Catholic, married to my DH (07/07) and mom to David (03/09), Andrew (11/10;vbac), Jonathan (09/12;vbac) , and Michael (07/14; vbac)
bruenderbaby is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Copyright 2005 - 2014 Escalate Media. All Rights Reserved.