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Old 07-16-2007, 09:08 AM   #21
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Re: Terrible TWO's? What a joke!

I am right there with all of you and your "wonderful" little 3yr olds!! My ds is 3 1/2 and my dd is 2 and I have a 3mo old ds!! 3 is soooo much worse than 2. I have been doing the "1-2-3 magic" and it does help. I also feel like I yell a lot though. Usually it is when I am feeding or dealing with the baby!

I will be watching this thread for any and all advice.

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Old 07-16-2007, 09:55 AM   #22
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Re: Terrible TWO's? What a joke!

There have been studies that show children do not understand contractions (don't, won't, can't...). They hear do instead of don't....

I think your little boy doesn't realize he's doing exactly what you do not want him to do. He hears you telling him, don't, and repeats won't, then does it. It really sounds to me like he's hearing do, and will.

Try telling him what you do want him to do.

-Play with this toy
-Leave that alone, it's not for babies
-Come over here
-Go over there
-Wait for Mommy

Then he hears what you want him to do, repeats it, and does it (instead of hearing what you do not want him to do, repeating it, and doing it).

Last edited by Bot Girl; 07-16-2007 at 10:05 AM.
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Old 07-16-2007, 10:03 AM   #23
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Re: Terrible TWO's? What a joke!

This isn't going to help, but my 3yo yesturday......
as my 5yr old pushed the button to make the garage door go up, DS3 Held on tight and was screaming as it took him all the way UP!! UGH, I ran out of the house screaming at him, and YES HE DID GET A GOOD SWAT on his butt!! You do not play on the garage door! or under it!

This is now the 4th spanking this child has gotten in his short almost 4 years of life! And each time it was for somethign that could have killed him, and yes this could have killed him, I couldn't even reach him when I told him to drop. Its a high garage door.

I hope your little one outgrows it soon, because it is a push mom's button phase at 3 (and yes its not terrible twos, They tell you that so you expect things to get easier............................................ ................They Don't)
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Old 07-16-2007, 10:09 AM   #24
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Re: Terrible TWO's? What a joke!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Katherine View Post
Coincidentally, this is the case with teenagers, too. You throw too many words at them, they stop listening. Keep your instructions/comments short and memorable, they're agreeable. Uh, but don't try the toddler talk thing with them.

Teenagers however use a different part of their brain, so when they do something "stupid" and tell you "I don't know" for their reason on WHY they did it, they honestly do not know, that portion of their brain is not what is functioning during those years. (I am not sure when that starts or stops, but a teenager is much like a toddler in the brain functioning realities of life- and as I was taking my classes for my masters in counseling I had so many good laughs on that subject but it still doesn't help me in real life when a situation comes up and you just want to scream, "WHAT WERE YOU THINKING??")
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Old 07-16-2007, 11:55 AM   #25
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Re: Terrible TWO's? What a joke!

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Originally Posted by Bot Girl View Post
Try telling him what you do want him to do.


Also -- kids reflect back what our expectations are: if you expect misbehavior, well, then you'll get it.
Even if it's a HUGE leap to expect wonderful cooperation from your child, if you do expect it (within actual abilities!) it will become manifested....
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Old 07-16-2007, 12:04 PM   #26
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Re: Terrible TWO's? What a joke!

Hoo boy, I thought my 20 month old was a handful. I fear the future.
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Old 07-16-2007, 12:15 PM   #27
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Re: Terrible TWO's? What a joke!

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I have a little boy just like this mamas. I too recommend a lot of the books the previous mama did. I'm a first grade teacher as well, so I also have a few tricks up my sleeves, but there are days when I need to remind myself that he is only two. I found the best trick from these books is to use toddler language with them. It seems stupid but it does wonders. Here is an example: My son grabs something that he isn't supposed to have, yet has climbed up with his superman strength and gotten it for the umpteenth time. Instead, of screaming about the fact that I told him a hundred times not to get it or something like that, you would say in toddler speak, "no, Noah no get that. Poison. Owwie to Noah." Most of the time, he will stop in his tracks, look at me in understanding and follow my directions. "Noah, put it down. put it down and no touch." This is the same boy who, if I would have screamed and yelled at, would have turned and run with it.

Remember mamas, part of what they do at this age, is to test things. They also test their parents limits to see what and how far they can go with things. It is not defiance when they look at you and do it anyway. It is to see what will happen if.... Use a quiet calm voice, speak to them so they can understand and try to speak to them at eye level, get down on your knees when you can to talk to them. Half the time they are just trying to get your attention. My son gets into the most trouble when I'm "busy". They want your attention and if the only way they can get it is to do something negative, they will keep doing it. So take the time to really engage them in a positive way. Catch them being good and praise them. They will get attention any way they can, so if you give them lots of praise for the good things, they won't need to try to get it by doing the negative things.
I sit here and laugh, not,because it is funny but, because this is SO my LIFE! I am totally going to try "speaking 2 y/o" Thanks you so much for this idea. This is one I have yet to try and like all the other mamas I am at my wits end on the verge of a nervous breakdown!!!
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Old 07-16-2007, 12:28 PM   #28
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Re: Terrible TWO's? What a joke!

Quote:
Originally Posted by momof4in2007 View Post
Done the 2's 3 times, doing the 3's a third time and yes 3 IS worse than 2!!
Please tell me this isn't true...
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Old 07-16-2007, 12:35 PM   #29
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Re: Terrible TWO's? What a joke!

Is it bad that my son sounds almost exactly like this and he's 1.

I have learned thus far that telling him what he CAN do works a lot better. Otherwise I'm saying "NO! DON'T! STOP!" allllllllll day long. Which just makes our house sound incredibly negative.

Kids are so much harder than they look.
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Old 07-16-2007, 12:52 PM   #30
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Re: Terrible TWO's? What a joke!

My life exactly...I have a 3 1/2 and a 1 1/2 and they seem to feed off of each other. Everything I read says that 3 1/2 is supposed to be the toughest...and I believe it. Just today, my dd was going potty and I noticed that she was taking a while. I went to check on her and she had unrolled an entire roll of toilet paper...my instint was to fuss at her and say...you know better, but better sense got ahold of me. I made her clean it up all by herself...she whined, I'm too tired to do it all by myself... I said, that's funny you were not too tired to make the mess. anyways, long story short, I thought we were over this stuff...ha, ha, ha. She's really started lying to us and it seems like everyday we have to talk about how important it is to tell the truth. She has a sassy mouth...no idea where she's picked that up, except for it's just the age. She will defiantly say "no, I will not!"...ohhh, that gets under my skin...yes mam you will!!!! It seems like other parents I talk to with kids this age are going through the same things...boy, I'll be glad to get out of this stage...only with another one going right into the two's...
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