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Old 07-21-2006, 06:45 AM   #1
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falling asleep w/o breast or bottle? HELP PLEASE

Okay, I am really needing some advice. I have got to solve this sleep problem. I have been told a million times that I have screwed up, but I can't do anything now soooooo...Here is the situation. My baby has just turned one year old. She will only go to sleep with me or my husband laying beside her giving her a bottle. She has always fallen asleep breastfeeding or with a bottle. I could never just "let her cry" herself to sleep. SO NOW HERE WE ARE...I need to get her off the bottle and I need to help her learn to fall asleep by herself, but I don't know how to do it. She doesn't have a comfort item (she just playing with her, my, or my husband's hair while falling asleep). I really don't want to let her scream, but I know I have got to do something because it is getting harder and harder to put her to sleep. Plus, I am not supposed to keep on bottle feeding. PLEASE please please help me...I don't know what to do. Plus, we are moving to another state in 2 weeks so I feel like moving to a new home is going to be hard enough for her. I have tried to sing the same song everytime she goes to sleep and to make her play with her hair not mine. However, we don't have many more routines. She is still taking two long naps each day and having 3 bottles per day. Thanks for any suggestions you can give

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Old 07-21-2006, 07:34 AM   #2
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Re: falling asleep w/o breast or bottle? HELP PLEASE

We had the same problem with my middle child. He would never fall asleep without his bottle and if we tried he screamed and screamed. I couldn't take it so I just let him have the bottle. I know its not suppose to be good for him and the peds we all telling me its time to take it away however we just moved too and I was preggo with #3 and I thought that was a lot for a 1 yr old to handle so I didn't listen. My ds let go of his bottle and switched to a sippy cup at around 15-16 months. He still won't sleep without a sippy cup of water but hey its like a security blanket for him and I'm not taking it from him. There is absolutely nothing wrong with his teeth and he is healthy and happy! I wouldn't worry too much about it when she is ready to let it go she will. Does she use sippys at all during the day? Maybe you could try switching slowly to sippys for naps and bedtime. Hope this helps a little.
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Old 07-21-2006, 07:57 AM   #3
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Re: falling asleep w/o breast or bottle? HELP PLEASE

First- I wouldn't make any changes until after you move and get settled. The couple of weeks that she will still be taking a bottle aren't going to warp her permanently. Once you get settled into your new house you can start working on a solution. I'd maybe try moving from a bottle with formula or milk to a bottle with water- since it's probably the sugars in the milk that they worry about. We had a similar problem with our 3rd in that she nursed herself to sleep. At about 9 months I was getting tired of not being able to have my own bedtime routine that didn't include nursing a baby to sleep- and we really wanted to move her bedtime earlier so that dh and I could have a few minutes alone together each night. We used the sleep lady (I think it's sleeplady.com) recommendations and they worked. I started taking her into her bedroom, nursing her in her room instead of my bed, then we read a book and said our prayers. After that, she got put into her bed and left there. I stayed beside her bed and patted her back and talked to her for several nights- then put her in her bed and talked to her but no patting on the back. After a few more nights I put her in her bed and backed away but stayed in the room. I gradually moved to the door- and it only took about 8 nights total before she was going to sleep on her own very easily.
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Old 07-21-2006, 08:09 AM   #4
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Re: falling asleep w/o breast or bottle? HELP PLEASE

I'm still using a bottle and know I will have to address that issue sooner or later (later!) - but I have been reading Elizabeth Pantley's No Cry Sleep Solution and it has great ideas for helping a toddler to fall asleep...

Good luck and I second waiting until you are moved and thinning the milk down with water.
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Old 07-21-2006, 08:28 AM   #5
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Re: falling asleep w/o breast or bottle? HELP PLEASE

My son was the same way..and I allowed him to have a bottle of water to go to bed with every night/nap until shortly after his 2nd bday. He's fine

He wasn't waking up at night to eat though...so he wasn't taking a bottle for nutrition. But I just figured that it was probably the milk in the bottle they weren't thrilled about...so anytime I gave him a bottle to go to sleep, it was water. I've read in different places that according to this dentist or that dentist..the teeth aren't affected by paci's or bottles until 2+ yrs or 3 yrs.
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Old 07-21-2006, 08:40 AM   #6
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Re: falling asleep w/o breast or bottle? HELP PLEASE

Why do you have to stop her bottle? You said she just turned 1, right? She's still a baby - she'll be fine, unless there's a medical/religious/ethical reason you're taking the bottle away. My oldest was just about 4 before we managed to finangle his bottle away (I'm mean and put his baby brother's formula in it - he said it was gross and gave it to me ).

Nathan is 15 months and still nurses to sleep - I know the wanting to have the evening to yourself, but it's not that long before she won't WANT you to tuck her in cause she's a "big girl", kwim?

I love the nighttime with Nathan - it's the only time of the day that we get US time and it's quiet and he's not throwing toys around the house and running away with the phone! lol

I agree with the PP though - don't do anything major until at least after you move - that'd be too much change for her to take all at once.
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Old 07-21-2006, 09:00 AM   #7
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Re: falling asleep w/o breast or bottle? HELP PLEASE

I think the problem with the bottle is the sugar from the milk. You risk rotting their teeth. My best friends mom gave her baby sister either a bottle of milk or sugar water at night as a baby, and when her teetch came in, they were black. I'm guessing that the sugar water is more harmful than the milk, but it's still probably not good.

My dd is 2.5 and although she hasn't has a bottle in about a year, she want her Spongebob sippy cup at night ("boobauge cup"), so we just put water in it. It always has water in it in the mornings. She just likes to hold it. I bet switching to water bottles woould be fine in your case too! Good luck!
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Old 07-21-2006, 10:17 AM   #8
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Re: falling asleep w/o breast or bottle? HELP PLEASE

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ontariomama
Why do you have to stop her bottle? You said she just turned 1, right? She's still a baby - she'll be fine, unless there's a medical/religious/ethical reason you're taking the bottle away. My oldest was just about 4 before we managed to finangle his bottle away (I'm mean and put his baby brother's formula in it - he said it was gross and gave it to me ).

Nathan is 15 months and still nurses to sleep - I know the wanting to have the evening to yourself, but it's not that long before she won't WANT you to tuck her in cause she's a "big girl", kwim?

I love the nighttime with Nathan - it's the only time of the day that we get US time and it's quiet and he's not throwing toys around the house and running away with the phone! lol

I agree with the PP though - don't do anything major until at least after you move - that'd be too much change for her to take all at once.
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Old 07-21-2006, 10:52 AM   #9
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Re: falling asleep w/o breast or bottle? HELP PLEASE

one is still early.
david would only sleep with booboo. i tried not to give to him but didnt work. so i stopped and waited little longer. he was 2.5 (last jan) when he stopped doing it. now he sleeps thru the night.
if you dont have to necesarily stop iowuldnt, it will happne though. some take time.
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Old 07-21-2006, 12:31 PM   #10
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Re: falling asleep w/o breast or bottle? HELP PLEASE

from what my friend who is a dentist says, the teeth being pushed wrong is not a problem until their big teeth come in. It is mostly the rotten teethe they worry about if you just give a bottle of plain water it is not going to hurt the teeth. My friend went from the bottle of water to the soft spout Nuby, then to a regular hard cup and the child is 3 and still has to have his water. for him though if it is not in his bed he will wake up and scream in teh middle of the night cause he is thristy, so I don't know if anything I said made sense or helps, but here it is.
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