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Old 10-16-2007, 02:04 PM   #21
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Re: Friend encouraging me to stop BF

I personally would start a gradual distancing of myself from her. I don't do well keeping my mouth shut. I'd probably tell her off and end the friendship on a sour note......

Could you possibly continue your friendship on an "adult" basis? Maybe get together without your LO's and talk about anything expect parenting?


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Old 10-16-2007, 02:12 PM   #22
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Re: Friend encouraging me to stop BF

I've decided that my comeback for parenting advice I don't need or want will be "I appreciate your concern, but we are fine." Simple, to the point, hopefully will shut them up.

I haven't tried it out yet, but may get to tonight.
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Old 10-16-2007, 02:32 PM   #23
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Re: Friend encouraging me to stop BF


in case you didnt get the chance to google it, maybe this will help
Artie -- wife to Bryan natural birthing, cosleeping, CDing, non-vaxxing, non-circ'ing mommy to Riley Thomas 3/22/08 and Abbey Raine10/6/11
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Old 10-16-2007, 02:35 PM   #24
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Re: Friend encouraging me to stop BF

Here's some info from kellymom:

MYTH: Motherís milk becomes less nutritious after the first year.
FACT: Motherís milk continues to provide substantial amounts of nutrients well beyond the first year. At some point your baby will need to take in nutrients from other sources, but motherís milk remains a valuable contribution to your childís diet.
Extended Breastfeeding Myths

BOttom line: do what's best for YOU AND YOUR BABY. Ignore everyone else. Offer them some bean dip!

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BFAR'd 32 months, 32months, BFARing now!
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Old 06-18-2008, 07:58 AM   #25
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Re: Friend encouraging me to stop BF

I would try to inject humor/lightness about it that got to the point. Like the next time she makes a comment sigh and say "you always ask that, lets talk about something else." or "not that question again! I am really more interesting than that one topic, surely there are more questions to ask me."

or I would be direct, but still light: "do you know you always ask me that question. what's up with that?" or even "you know that I don't judge your decisions, do you know how much you attack me on this? why?"

This is so her issue. she might think you think she is a bad mom for not doing it. She might mistake you pride in doing it (which you should rightfully have!) as holier-than-thou. if you decide to address it, address it has HER problem, not yours. and if she tried to get back on making it about breast feeding, gently guide her back to introspection, b/c this really has nothing to do with you or your choices.

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Old 06-18-2008, 08:12 AM   #26's Avatar
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Re: Friend encouraging me to stop BF

I have/had a friend like this also. It hurt me when she would make her stand on issues that I did not even force or talk much with her about. She was big on standing up to me about co-sleeping ("he'' be fine, get him out of your bed") and homebirth ("just make sure all that afterbirth is cleaned up before I come visit").
Isn't it strange that those who choose to go the main route for these child-rearing issues and choices are the ones making the comments? It's not usually the Momma who breastfeeds or homebirths that is making the fuss to the other Mommas.

Maybe she feels bad deep down that she did not BF her dc, I mean it's quite out there in the media and everywhere that BREASTFEEDING is the BEST! I guess be as gentle as possible as that may be the case and stand firm in knowing, you are do the very best thing for that growing baby! And one more point, (maybe it's already been said as I did not read all the postings) but breastmilk for toddlers changes to fit toddlers so it's VERY much about nutrition! Enjoy yourself and baby!
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Old 06-18-2008, 08:12 AM   #27
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Re: Friend encouraging me to stop BF

Originally Posted by stefanielee2001 View Post
You know, you may not be far off. I really love her, like a sister, but we have to be soo careful about stepping on each others toes about parenting. She just doesnt understand me on things sometimes, or I purposely don't about about stuff cause I know it wont be a conversation, rather a debate.
I think you need to gently but firmly tell her that you and her have different parenting philosophies and you think it is a subject that is best left alone. And maybe go on to say... I would not dream of lecturing you against FFing, so I would prefer if you stopped pressuring me to stop BFing. We are both doing what we think is best for our kids, let's leave it at that.
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Old 06-18-2008, 08:16 AM   #28
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Re: Friend encouraging me to stop BF

Next time she mentions it, I would reply that you're planning on BFing until the baby self-weans, and if she persists I would ask her why it's so important to her! It's your baby and your body...this person needs to be reminded of that!
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Old 06-18-2008, 08:24 AM   #29
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Re: Friend encouraging me to stop BF

funny how you don't ask her why she FF her baby in a judging manner every time you see her. my sister is the same way. she is my best friend in the world but we have completely different parenting styles. i just told her that she should do what she sees fit for her LOs and I will do as i see fit for mine. and she hasn't mentioned it again.

now my mom.........that is another story. ugh.

hang in there mama, just know that you are doing what is best for your LO, he will wean before you know it. just enjoy.
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Old 06-18-2008, 10:49 AM   #30
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Re: Friend encouraging me to stop BF

nak. here's another kellymom link about nursing toddlers. kellymom rocks! i love how her stuff is so easy to search and is backed up by research.
My babe eats when she's hungry.
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