Reply Hey Mom! Learn more about the Gerber Life Insurance Grow-Up Plan!
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 11-25-2007, 01:11 PM   #1
titania's Avatar
titania
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 5,762
My Mood:
Smile top ways to help after baby is born

my sister is having her first baby in feb, and her shower is in 2 weeks. i was thinking about gathering a bunch of ways other people can help after the baby is born, and print them out and have them around at the shower. i know people really like to help, but often don't know what to do, so the suggestions may be useful.

so what was the best thing someone did for you, or you wish someone had done?

Advertisement

__________________
~helen~ mama to 6 yo tornado twins, jonas and micah and my 3 yo wild child, eli
titania is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-25-2007, 01:19 PM   #2
Sweet_Fantasy_Fox
No Longer Here
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: ~*West Coast*~
Posts: 61,873
My Mood:
Re: top ways to help after baby is born

for me~
make meals for us so i didn't have to worry about it.
take care of the baby for an hour or 2 so i could get a little bit of straight sleep.
wash the laundry, clean the home, feed the pets

my dh did all this for me when i had my kids and i really appreciated it all, less to worry about while your trying to recover and enjoy the new baby.

Last edited by Sweet_Fantasy_Fox; 11-25-2007 at 01:20 PM.
Sweet_Fantasy_Fox is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-25-2007, 01:20 PM   #3
emilykaysmommy
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 775
Re: top ways to help after baby is born

a friend made us a casserole the day after we came home from the hospital! It was the best thing! We didn't have to worry about dinner for a couple nights, it was great
__________________
Megan: wife to Desmond (6.25.05), mama to Emily Kay (12.2.06) and Zane Alexander (9.13.10)
emilykaysmommy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-25-2007, 01:23 PM   #4
drocker's Avatar
drocker
Registered Users
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Vancouver, WA
Posts: 960
My Mood:
Re: top ways to help after baby is born

I was so overwhelmed and still healing from a csection when I came home that it was exhausting having people coming over to visit. The best thing my friend did for me was make a lasagna and just drop it off without coming in. I don't know how you would suggest that on a list without being offensive, but it was so selfless of her that I just wanted to give her a big ol hug!
drocker is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-25-2007, 01:25 PM   #5
Bunny's Avatar
Bunny
Be strong little marshmallow.
Formerly: s**e**h
seller
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Seattle's backyard
Posts: 3,462
Re: top ways to help after baby is born

~Cooked dinner for me (you know, some frozen things I could just pop in the oven) because for some reason it didn't occur to me while I was pregnant that this was a good idea.

~When they came over to visit offer to clean or run errands instead of hold the baby.

~Try not to stay too long. Not that company isn't welcome, but it can be really draining to have visitors that just won't leave when it's time.

~Ask and really listen to what mama says. Don't change diapers, outfits, pick up baby or move things around without asking first. She's the mama. She's the boss.

~Offer support if she needs it, but do NOT continue to offer after she declines. No one likes to feel like someone is implying that they can't mother their own child (My MIL - are you listening?!?!?!), even if they are brand new to the parenting role.
Bunny is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-25-2007, 01:27 PM   #6
ferrferr
Banned
seller
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Catsquirrels
Posts: 4,249
My Mood:
Re: top ways to help after baby is born

Anything and everything so the mama can focus on the baby. My boyfriend banished me from doing anything other than worrying about feeding DD#2. He would even deal with the diapers. I got to sleep when she did and concentrate on nursing.
ferrferr is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-25-2007, 01:30 PM   #7
S Starr's Avatar
S Starr
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Pacific NW
Posts: 3,312
My Mood:
Re: top ways to help after baby is born

Good idea! I second the few-days-without-many-visitors.... Beyond that, meals were really helpful, and laundry. Shopping -- diff friends could organize a shopping trip twice a week for a couple of weeks. Depending on SO support, the first week isn't necessarily the bad one; it's worse after SO has returned to work, dishes are piling up, help is thinning out, and both parents are exhausted! So maybe cleaning/meals/etc help scheduled for the first month? but I had a c-section and then horrible mastitis, so maybe I was more helpless than most.
S Starr is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-25-2007, 01:38 PM   #8
sillymama's Avatar
sillymama
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Eastern NC
Posts: 3,120
My Mood:
Re: top ways to help after baby is born

I agree with all the PPs.

Definitely 3 to 5 days of people arranging to bring dinner. Someone to watch the baby while she takes a shower (I need a shower everyday to feel human and not like the walking dead). Someone to watch the baby while she takes a nap in the afternoon. Someone to vacuum/laundry/do dishes in the evening. I didn't mind people coming over, but I always needed them to call ahead and never stay more than 20 to 30 minutes.

My top suggestion would finding people who will put the baby down. I had my husband, mom, and sister around for the first two to three weeks and when it came time for me to be by myself with the baby she was already accustom to being held all the time. I won't make that mistake with number two.
__________________
*Elizabeth*
Loving wife to Erik - the man who drives me wild and drives me crazy .
Mother to Amelia (12.06), Charlotte (11.08), Clark (3.11), and Tabitha (6.13).
sillymama is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-25-2007, 01:38 PM   #9
Terra
Drinks her not-just-a-smoothie pina coladas in ALL CAPS in front of her preschoolers before she takes her CDs and goes home.
seller
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Central Florida
Posts: 12,253
My Mood:
Re: top ways to help after baby is born

I very much agree about the meals...I would maybe even do something unique at the shower like make pre-prepared meals for the mom to be to take home and freeze...

I think the "coupons" for cleaning and errands are awesome too!! Or even a gift certificate to a maid service...I think that would be an awesome shower gift! Get a maid once or twice a month for the first 6 weeks or so!

I think it is a wonderful thing that you are already thinking ahead for her!!!!
__________________
Sometimes the grass is greener on the other side!
Terra is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-25-2007, 01:39 PM   #10
titania's Avatar
titania
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 5,762
My Mood:
Re: top ways to help after baby is born

these are really great mamas, thank you! i know for us, the best thing was the food that everyone brought. but does everything have to have cheese in it?? i swear that's why micah can't handle dairy now, he was exposed to sooo much of it when he was a newborn!
__________________
~helen~ mama to 6 yo tornado twins, jonas and micah and my 3 yo wild child, eli
titania is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Copyright 2005 - 2014 Escalate Media. All Rights Reserved.