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Old 12-18-2007, 01:42 PM   #1
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Unhappy "if she's still nursing by 2 years old, then we're going to talk..."

*sigh*

I'm trying to get along with DD's grandparents on her daddy's side. I'm a single mom, who is trying to keep the peace between families because it's important to me AND my sweet 8 month old daughter...

A couple weeks ago we were visiting DD's grandpa, and he was asking me about food because she has taken interest in the things she sees mommy eating all the time. She eats mushy food (no teeth yet) occasionally, but is still mainly BF.

So DD's grandpa asks if she's still nursing, and I said "yep! until she decides to self-wean!"
and his next remark caught me offguard, he said, "Well that's fine and good but if she's still nursing by 2 years old, then we're going to have to talk!"

I'm still kind of offended and confused by his statement... but to add to it, him and his new wife started in about how "it's gross/weird" to see older children nursing.

Now I'm extremely self-conscious around them and I'm afraid to nurse at their house at all

It's already a really strange situation trying to keep the peace between families, but this makes me just not want to come around anymore...

Anyway, thanks for listening... I'm hoping maybe someone on here has some suggestions, and feel free to share similar stories (maybe you can relate?)...

Thanks!

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Last edited by cassondruh; 12-18-2007 at 01:43 PM. Reason: oops, typo!
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Old 12-18-2007, 01:44 PM   #2
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Re: "if she's still nursing by 2 years old, then we're going to talk..."


Just remember you are the mama, and you can not please everyone all the time, SO there s no point in trying, just always makes statements with a kind heart.
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Old 12-18-2007, 01:46 PM   #3
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Re: "if she's still nursing by 2 years old, then we're going to talk..."

Gosh, I would say by that time he might not be around to say anything. Sorry that was mean. But seriously, what business does he have in your breastfeeding relationship?
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Old 12-18-2007, 01:54 PM   #4
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Re: "if she's still nursing by 2 years old, then we're going to talk..."


I've no advice, especially since my SO's family makes comments like that too. I just tell them he'll wean when he's ready or I'm done, not until! Grr...makes me mad when other people think they know what's best for YOUR baby.
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Old 12-18-2007, 02:10 PM   #5
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Re: "if she's still nursing by 2 years old, then we're going to talk..."


So sorry he said that mama; glad that you are committed to you and to nursing. If you DO talk when she's two, I'm sure you'll be able to tell him all the reasons it's still good for dd to be nursing.
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Old 12-18-2007, 02:22 PM   #6
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Re: "if she's still nursing by 2 years old, then we're going to talk..."

Hey atleast he said 2 not 1.
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Old 12-18-2007, 02:29 PM   #7
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Re: "if she's still nursing by 2 years old, then we're going to talk..."

I try not to be around people like that. But I understand it is difficult. If he mentions it again, I would def. tell him "we need to talk..."

You don't need to 'defend yourself' to him persay, but just simply state your reasoning, an leave it at that. If they continue to belittle you, then I would start 'weaning' myself from them.
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Old 12-19-2007, 01:53 PM   #8
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Re: "if she's still nursing by 2 years old, then we're going to talk..."

Try to let the comment roll off your back. By the time she's 2, HE may want to talk, but that doesn't mean that YOU have to listen, or participate in any way. "That's nice" and a change of subject is a perfectly appropriate response in situations where someone is giving you unsolicited advice or opinions.
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Old 12-19-2007, 02:12 PM   #9
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Re: "if she's still nursing by 2 years old, then we're going to talk..."

I'd ask him why the age that your DD nurses to is so important to him. Or better yet, why anything you do with your boobs is his business! Turn the tables and demand that if he's still making love to his wife in missionary position in 2 years, you're going to have to "talk" to him, because you don't approve of that technique.
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Old 12-19-2007, 02:25 PM   #10
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Re: "if she's still nursing by 2 years old, then we're going to talk..."

Quote:
I'd ask him why the age that your DD nurses to is so important to him. Or better yet, why anything you do with your boobs is his business! Turn the tables and demand that if he's still making love to his wife in missionary position in 2 years, you're going to have to "talk" to him, because you don't approve of that technique.
That is hilarious!!!

I think that I would tell him in a very nice manner. "Thanks for the concern, but breasfeeding is a very personal choice , but it really is none of anyone elses business how long or how often I nurse."
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