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Old 12-31-2007, 12:02 PM   #11
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Re: My SIL pumping but not giving milk to baby

i think it depends so much where you are - when my littlest was in the picu in Portland Or they were totally bf friendly and always gave him my milk in his tummy tube - when they decided he need more calories they added fortifier to MY MILK! But before he was even sick (RSV) and just slow gain tiny baby at birth the doc in kansas pushed formula even though they figured he was drinking 3+ oz a feeding - he was only 6-7lbs - how much can their little tummies fit?

i say all that to say - i think enviroment matters SO MUCH!

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Old 12-31-2007, 02:50 PM   #12
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Re: My SIL pumping but not giving milk to baby

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Unfortunately, some hospitals won't use the pumped milk because they are all about the sugar calories from the formula...it's a matter of stick weight on the baby quick to move them out, rather than what is actually best for the baby. Could the nurses at her hospital be this way? Thus causing her discouragement?
That's unbelievable to me. Not trying to derail. But my 4th dd was in the NICU with respiratory distress. She was on a ventilator and fed on a feeding tube. They had a LC in my room with a pump within 5 mins of admitting her to the NICU telling me that they request all mothers of NICU babies to pump breastmilk for them to have while in the NICU because it was preferable to formula. They said breastmilk for preemies was specially formulated for their young bodies and they would get healthier faster with breastmilk. They also were very eager for colostrum. I think Moira got one feeding of formula before I started producing milk and I brought 16 unused containers of breastmilk home from the hospital. They would never give her a bottle either once she was nursing if I could get there to feed her and I did 99% of the time. I have to question a NICU that would push formula over the use of breastmilk. I wouldn't want my children there for sure.
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Old 12-31-2007, 03:26 PM   #13
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Re: My SIL pumping but not giving milk to baby

did you ask her why she is doing/did that? I don't see how you can get upset if you haven't talked to her about it to find the reasoning behind it

I am a breastfeeding mama but I can think of much worse things to get upset and vent about
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Old 12-31-2007, 03:33 PM   #14
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Re: My SIL pumping but not giving milk to baby

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That's unbelievable to me. Not trying to derail. But my 4th dd was in the NICU with respiratory distress. She was on a ventilator and fed on a feeding tube. They had a LC in my room with a pump within 5 mins of admitting her to the NICU telling me that they request all mothers of NICU babies to pump breastmilk for them to have while in the NICU because it was preferable to formula. They said breastmilk for preemies was specially formulated for their young bodies and they would get healthier faster with breastmilk. They also were very eager for colostrum. I think Moira got one feeding of formula before I started producing milk and I brought 16 unused containers of breastmilk home from the hospital. They would never give her a bottle either once she was nursing if I could get there to feed her and I did 99% of the time. I have to question a NICU that would push formula over the use of breastmilk. I wouldn't want my children there for sure.
ITA---I can't imagine a nicu that wouldn't use bm. My ds was also in the nicu and they really encouraged bm esp. for preemies/sick babes even if you weren't planning to bf.
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Old 12-31-2007, 03:52 PM   #15
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Re: My SIL pumping but not giving milk to baby

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ITA---I can't imagine a nicu that wouldn't use bm. My ds was also in the nicu and they really encouraged bm esp. for preemies/sick babes even if you weren't planning to bf.
I think it must vary from NICU to NICU. A friend of mine had a 4-week preemie and she was actually not allowed to breastfeed because he wasn't gaining weight. He wouldn't take a bottle either, and she couldn't sign him out AMA until he gained X amount of weight. She would still try to sneak in and BF him though, but the docs demanded that he have formula.

OP, that sucks that your SIL is being wasteful. I hope she gets things ironed out when baby comes home and she can nurse full time and not have to pump...maybe she is just so frazzled with being a new mom and having a preemie that she's not thinking clearly?
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Old 12-31-2007, 04:05 PM   #16
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Re: My SIL pumping but not giving milk to baby

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I think it must vary from NICU to NICU. A friend of mine had a 4-week preemie and she was actually not allowed to breastfeed because he wasn't gaining weight. He wouldn't take a bottle either, and she couldn't sign him out AMA until he gained X amount of weight. She would still try to sneak in and BF him though, but the docs demanded that he have formula.

OP, that sucks that your SIL is being wasteful. I hope she gets things ironed out when baby comes home and she can nurse full time and not have to pump...maybe she is just so frazzled with being a new mom and having a preemie that she's not thinking clearly?
This can sometimes be a different situation, though. There are some babies who burn too many calories from actually nursing at the breast, so they need to give all nutrition through a tube or other means that take less effort on the baby's part. And in some cases, the baby's do need more densely nutritious food, and so they give a special preemie formula.
I agree that breastmilk is ideal in most cases, but there are certain cases where other things need to be done. In the case of the OP's sister, I can't figure out why she's not taking the milk to the NICU. BUt in the case of your friend, it may have been truly medically neccessary.
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Old 01-02-2008, 09:47 AM   #17
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Re: My SIL pumping but not giving milk to baby

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did you ask her why she is doing/did that? I don't see how you can get upset if you haven't talked to her about it to find the reasoning behind it

I am a breastfeeding mama but I can think of much worse things to get upset and vent about
I did not ask, because they are the type that sometimes just doesn't get it....like she already has her mind made up that she isn't going to BF very long. I was with them when the went to Sams and bought a HUGE can of formula because they were going to 'need' it. I wasn't against the use of formula, i was just against her pumping and throwing it away. Just from knowing them personally with other issues and spending time around them some things aren't up for discussion....if that makes sense. (it's more of an internal/personal vent for me b/c my do not count to her, but i'm there if she needs me)

ETA: I don't know if it makes a difference but she also wasn't measuring what she pumped, each time she pumped she adds that to the milk already in a bottle, so you have milk from day one pumped mixed with milk from day 4/5, kwim?
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Old 01-02-2008, 09:53 AM   #18
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Re: My SIL pumping but not giving milk to baby

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I think it must vary from NICU to NICU. A friend of mine had a 4-week preemie and she was actually not allowed to breastfeed because he wasn't gaining weight. He wouldn't take a bottle either, and she couldn't sign him out AMA until he gained X amount of weight. She would still try to sneak in and BF him though, but the docs demanded that he have formula.

OP, that sucks that your SIL is being wasteful. I hope she gets things ironed out when baby comes home and she can nurse full time and not have to pump...maybe she is just so frazzled with being a new mom and having a preemie that she's not thinking clearly?
he's not a preemie though...he was 8lb 12 oz. and born 4 days before due date. He just had a little fluid on his lungs and pneumonia (xray just a tiny hazy so they wanted him on antibiotic for x amount of days) He would drink 2 bottles of formula (2 oz bottles) each feeding and nursed when she came up there 2 times a day. just from what i heard the nurses discussing with her they were encouraging her to BF because they mentioned diet, drinking lots, etc.
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Old 01-02-2008, 10:01 AM   #19
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Re: My SIL pumping but not giving milk to baby

I didn't read the other responses but I don't think its any of your business. Why are you getting so upset/involved in how she feeds her baby? She had the baby and pumped the milk. Its her decision and it doesn't need to make sense to anyone else. BTW, I am a nursing mom myself, so this isn't a formula feeding mom being defensive.
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Old 01-02-2008, 10:53 AM   #20
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Re: My SIL pumping but not giving milk to baby

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I didn't read the other responses but I don't think its any of your business. Why are you getting so upset/involved in how she feeds her baby? She had the baby and pumped the milk. Its her decision and it doesn't need to make sense to anyone else. BTW, I am a nursing mom myself, so this isn't a formula feeding mom being defensive.
I completely understand that...and that's why I'm not trying to 'change' her or anything in that manner and I have stayed out of it. So in that respect i'm not making it my business - it was just an internal question being posted on a public board....it would be the same as if you baked and froze ahead x number of meals and then decided to throw the away for the heck of it. Just why would you go through the trouble of making the meals if you weren't going to eat them in the first place? Why not just go buy a frozen lasagna from the grocery and be done with it if you didn't want to cook? Not saying you want lasagna, just trying to make a non-biased comparison. My questioning was not WHAT she feeds the baby necessarily because we talked about her nursing and including formula, it was why go through the work part of it and throw away - and her doing it every day several times a day. So for an instance take the fact that she's related to me out of the pic...why would anyone do that much work to not gain from it? Again this is just me thinking and somewhere I can post thoughts. FTR - I'm not getting involved with her on this either - like I haven't asked her what she's doing with her milk - I still have the option of venting and just getting it off my chest (whether i've spoken to her or not)...that's what these places are for mama
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