s/o thread-if you don't CIO what do you do? Firethorn come in here!

[saongiri]

The cio thread got me wondering--it is sad to me that so many mamas choose cio because they think they have no other choice.So I thought it might be helpful for those of us that don't cio to share what helps us make it through the tough times, which I am currently going through btw with my lo- the whole sleeping 2 hours a night for days!
I ask firethorn to come and talk since she said on the other thread that she has 10 children an never cio.

Share mamas--I'll be back to share my ideas soon--I'm nak

[mama2cody]

I don't let my son cry for long if I can help it because it 1- creates problems for me, because the noise of him crying really bothers me and also because I am bf and then I start to leak if he cries too long and 2- if he cries for longer than a couple minutes he will start to choke and gag and has trouble breathing.

That said.

There have been times since his birth that DS was nearly inconsolable and we HAD to just put him on the bed and walk away. After a couple minutes of regaining our own composure, one of us would go get him and help him calm down. We never let him cry overnight because it's easier and better for all of us if I just nurse him or pay his back and he goes back to sleep.

But I think that there ARE times when a mom has tried everything to help her child get to sleep and nothing has worked. CIO isn't the best thing to do, IMO, but for some, it really is their last option.

[saongiri]

I'm not debating about cio--I know why people do it-- I get it. I just thought maybe we could share ideas about other ways to deal with sleep or non sleep. Okay for me--I know first and foremost, I have to take care of me. That means for me-shower when I wake up, wear a decent outfit (ie not what I slept in), eat breakfast, do something to my hair, go out and be with like minded mamas who will empathize not criticize, ask my dh to help more.

[iris0110]

I've never done CIO. It bothers me to even consider doing it honestly, but on top of that I really think Tharen would have cried all night rather than go to sleep on his own. We cosleep so it isn't really an issue. He is a hard napper, he just doesn't take them no matter what unless he is in a car. When he was smaller he would sleep on my back in the Mei Tai, but that has been quite a while ago. With Kearnan I either held him, put him in the swing, or as he got older I would read to him. From about 18 months till he gave up his naps around 3yrs I would read to him for about 30mins-1hr while he fell asleep, then he woudl sleep for about 2hours. We read the Harry Potter books, Robin Hood, King Arthur, The Never Ending Story, THe Princess Bride, ect. We still read, but not for quite so long and he doesn't fall asleep anymore, but it worked wonderfully.

[ThatLinGirl]

I wear her down to sleep in my Beco as she nurses. When she wakes in the night, we nurse. If that doesn't work, I pat her and shush her and if that doesn't work, we get back up and I wear her again. Sometimes she does not want to nurse and cries -- so my husband comes in and puts her on his chest and pats her and rocks her.

FWIW, she wakes often still at 19 months. She cried a LOT for pretty much the first year of her life due to intolerance/reflux/GI issues. I understand that feeling of exhaustion.

[Kiddoson]

We too cosleep, and could never CIO. It tears my heart to hear my children cry. Since we cosleep getting him to sleep isn't an issue. For naps we nurse him to sleep or hold him to sleep with a pacifier. Once he is sleeping we put him down.

[saongiri]

Originally Posted by ThatLinGirl I wear her down to sleep in my Beco as she nurses. When she wakes in the night, we nurse. If that doesn't work, I pat her and shush her and if that doesn't work, we get back up and I wear her again. Sometimes she does not want to nurse and cries -- so my husband comes in and puts her on his chest and pats her and rocks her. FWIW, she wakes often still at 19 months. She cried a LOT for pretty much the first year of her life due to intolerance/reflux/GI issues. I understand that feeling of exhaustion.

this pretty much sounds like us right now (except I have a nana's jetpack) Jack's getting teeth and just when I thought we were turning the corner --another one decides to make its way through but I know it won't last forever

[ThatLinGirl]

Originally Posted by saongiri this pretty much sounds like us right now (except I have a nana's jetpack) Jack's getting teeth and just when I thought we were turning the corner --another one decides to make its way through but I know it won't last forever

Yup, it is really tough. Teething throws it off for us, too. When she's teething there are nights where we spend a lot of it up walking around trying to nurse and bounce her back to sleep... but even if I were pro-CIO, which I'm definitely not, who would let a hurty baby CIO anyway? That's just part of parenting, IMO.

I think we're on the last 2 teeth for awhile right now... some were very very rough.

[meltown]

there are books out that have helped me and others a lot. the one that helped me was "secrets of the baby whisperer". I am not a cosleeper. never have been and never will be. I like my space. even dh and I don't sleep to close most of the time. I have heard of people reading "the no cry sleep solution" but I have heard that it is quite a commitment. in the book I read you do calming techniques and it uses a routine to help you to learn to read your child and the cues they give you. it worked wonders for us. my son sleeps 12 hours still and has done that since he was 6 weeks old. I am currently pregnant and will use it with my new LO as well.

[Shayna]

FOr me it was simple, I did what ever i needed to do to sooth her, i rocked, i nursed...whatever it took...usually i could nurse her to sleep and try to get her laid down. TO me CIO was never an option.