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Old 01-28-2008, 03:09 PM   #11
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We're hvaing 2 baby showers, one later today and one in 2 weeks, so we're not fishing for more gifts, we just want everyone to get the chance to see the baby on our terms... is it tacky?
I don't think it is tacky. I'm having one of these but with no baby showers before...my due date is next Monday, and the timing for a traditional shower would have been right in the middle of holiday madness or recouperations, and I wasn't about to do that to anybody. We are looking at early March to introduce the LO to the world at large. Plenty of people will stop by at the hospital as I work there, and I know we'll have visitors at home. Fortunately we live far enough away from family that the visits from them will be less.

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Old 01-28-2008, 03:14 PM   #12
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Re: "welcome baby" party?

We will be having a meet the baby party after this one comes home - I would have had one for my other son, but we lived in a very small city condo and it would have been difficult at best.

I think we will have it open house style and cater the food and then we will have the time to enjoy the visitors and enjoy showing off the new baby.

I will also be noting in the invites not to bring gifts. I know that some people will not listen, but for others who are financially strapped, I do not want them to feel obligated to bring something when I just want them to come over. KWIM?
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Old 01-29-2008, 09:15 PM   #13
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Re: "welcome baby" party?

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I think having an "open house" type get together is great. I don't know how many people you are thinking of inviting, but a party would tend to have everyone there at the same time. a "drop in" or open house could have them spread out let's say between 11am-2pm or something. .
I agree! I do also agree with the pp who said some people will be disappointed at not getting personal time with the baby, but this will take care of a lot of the less involved people at once. And since you're having showers I think it's totally appropriate to say "No gifts -- just come meet the baby."
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Old 01-30-2008, 02:10 AM   #14
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Re: "welcome baby" party?

I think this is what we are going to do as well. I am most likely not getting a baby shower. Of course, close family will see the baby before the party. I thought it would be fun to have a thing for friends and people that might not go to a traditional baby shower. Plus we do need the help from gifts!
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Old 01-30-2008, 02:14 AM   #15
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Re: "welcome baby" party?

i think its a good idea and had a welcome baby party for dd when she was 3 weeks old.
we had one set for ds2 but it never happen because the weather then my kids got sick and time just passed on..
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Old 01-30-2008, 08:29 AM   #16
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Re: "welcome baby" party?

I want to have a get-together like this after this baby is born. I'm 23 wks and no one has mentioned a baby shower, so I'm guessing I won't be having one (I only had a shower for my 1st). My DD is May 27th and my DD's birthday is July 9th, so sometime in June I want to have a 'meet the new baby' type of get-together. Otherwise, I'm sure there will be people that see the baby for the 1st time at DD's birthday party and I don't want it to take the focus away from her. The only problem I can foresee is that I have a hard enough time getting my house clean for a party now... how am I going to manage it a couple weeks after the baby is born?! Just the thought of having to have a clean house kind of freaks me out! I do think it's a great idea, though, and I hope that we can pull it off!
Oh, and we'll be having a more intimate 'welcome baby' party on the day of the birth. When I'm in labor, my mom & dad are going to help my kids bake a birthday cake for the baby, so that when we get home from the birth center (a few hours after the birth), we can have a Birthday Party for the baby with our closest family (our kids, my mom & dad, my brothers, my SIL, and my MIL & FIL).
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Old 01-30-2008, 10:41 AM   #17
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Re: "welcome baby" party?

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I myself wouldn't do it. Think about it as everyone is anticipating this baby, not just you, dh, and your kids. I don't think it would be very kind to make everybody stay away until you can have a party where there will be who knows how many people wanting to see baby and nobody will hardly get a chance to actually spend time with baby. If I had this baby and told everyone to stay away until the party a month later, they would all be very hurt. I know I would be too!

Maybe it's just me though. I don't understand the whole not having anyone around for such an amount of time, I always have people around shortly after each of my births.
I kind of disagree w/ this view (but understand it!!!). She is the one who just carried this baby for 9 + months, and they are the ones who will be dealing w/ the hard transition of adding another to the family (new schedules, etc.). I can't imagine having to entertain all of these people while trying to get used to bringing in a new baby. Sure, people may become a little irritated, but what is more important is the bonding that you and your husband want with the baby and other lo. People don't come along w/ you on your honeymoon, why should they be there during your babymoon .
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Old 01-30-2008, 10:52 AM   #18
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Re: "welcome baby" party?

We had a party like this for DD! It was great! She was about 3 weeks old. And before that most hadn't seen her since the hospital...so it was a very fun and exciting party!
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Old 01-30-2008, 12:36 PM   #19
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Re: "welcome baby" party?

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I myself wouldn't do it. Think about it as everyone is anticipating this baby, not just you, dh, and your kids. I don't think it would be very kind to make everybody stay away until you can have a party where there will be who knows how many people wanting to see baby and nobody will hardly get a chance to actually spend time with baby. If I had this baby and told everyone to stay away until the party a month later, they would all be very hurt. I know I would be too!

Maybe it's just me though. I don't understand the whole not having anyone around for such an amount of time, I always have people around shortly after each of my births.
While I can certainly see where some family/friends might be dissapointed that they don't get to see, hold and cuddle the baby right away, I have to adamently disagree with it being an "innappropriate" thing to do.

My husband and I actually did this with our daughter when she was born. We made it crystal clear around the 7th month of my pregnancy that everyone would certainly get a chance to meet Gemma, but that we wanted the first two weeks after her birth to be free of visitors. We made that decision based on the fact that we A) Wanted to have adequate time to adjust and bond as a family of 3. Thats a big step from being "just married" and takes some getting used to. We wanted to develop good routines and habits with our newborn, like sleep cycles, bathing, feedings etc. and B) Because personally, I have a pretty high amount of stress that runs when I have company around. Feeling like the house needs to be clean, worrying about having food for everyone, as well as trying to juggle everyones chit-chat desires and such. Having people around on a Holiday? One thing. When you are post partum with a brand new baby and an emotional, fatigued mess? QUITE another.

The other element that played in (at least for me) was my maternal instincts. They were very very strong, perhaps a little overexaggerated, in the beginning. I didn't like anyone else holding or cuddling my child; and I did feel a sense of fear and even threat when I saw someone else trying to caress her or "mother" her. The last thing I needed was to watch family members and friends handing her off like a game of "hot potato". My nerves would have been completely shot .

My mom came out at 10 days PP, because she'd already had non-refundable tickets purchased a couple months in advance. So she snuck in 4 days early.

And even after the muss and fuss family made? When the 2 weeks was said and done, it was still another 2 before anyone could find time in their "busy schedules" to come see her .

I think having a WELCOME party is an awesome idea! Maybe you could even tell people that instead of bringing a gift, they bring a dish to share...so have the party potluck style. That enables you to still be able to spend time recouperating instead of making food for everyone. And whatever is leftover and go into the fridge or freezer for a quick meal on days when you dont have enough stamina to make something.

I totally support that idea!
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Old 01-30-2008, 12:53 PM   #20
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Re: "welcome baby" party?

I soooooo wish I was brave enough to take a step like this! Kudos to you!! Although, I must say, I really love having MIL & FIL around to hold the baby so I can just sleep that first week!! Of course, DH & I co-sleep at night, but say if the baby wakes up EARLY (5 a.m.), I feed him/her and then pass 'em over! The baby still gets cuddle time and DH & I get MUCH needed rest. But you guys do what's best for you, of course.

About the party, it sounds like a BEAUTIFUL idea! We always do that at my in-laws because they live 3 hours away. So we head over there & have a big BBQ so all my MIL's friends & family can come to check-out the new baby. We get A LOT of gifts at this, although there's no formal invite, that's just what their family does. I did have a baby shower with the 1st, so I don't get anymore baby showers with subsequent pregnancies, but they "feel the need to give." I certainly don't feel like they're obligated because I, personally, never feel obligated to give a gift. I give a gift because I want to & I never think, "well, that person never gave me gift when... so I'm not giving them one." It's not how I work, so I never feel guilty receiving a gift. I send thank you's, tell people about how their gift was used/appreciated and sometimes they get a pic of the baby in the outfit or using the gift.

My point is... I think it's a good idea to say something tactful (maybe in a poem?) like, this isn't a gift giving situation. But you will get gifts. Accept them graciously & don't feel guilty or like you're putting people in an obligated-to-gift situation. Maybe you can have a nice gift to give everybody who attends your function like a cutie (if you're crafty, hand-decorated) frame with a pic of the new baby in it & maybe some birth announcement type info if you can fit it/make it. I think people will just be so flattered that they were invited to/included in your *special day* with your newborn. GL with your birth! ;o)
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