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Old 08-25-2006, 06:35 AM   #1
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Angry Do they hate me????

My kids, do they hate me??? It is 8:15 int he morning and they alreadyhave me screaming at them. Normally I try the dentle and quiet approach but they have succeeded on just slowly driving me insane fore weeks and I finally just lost it. come on! They are 7 1/2 years apart how on earth can they fight this much.

My son is so whiney that I can't stnad it. All I hear is :Madison stop", Madison don't touch me" Madison stop following me" and when he is not telling her to stop he is just talking to her in this mean tone. I swear he hates her. He is never just nice to her, he NEVER plays with her or cares for her. It's like she is this flea that just keeps biting at him. He is lazy as heck and getting him to do anything is like pulling teeth. I am 9 months pregnant and I can't get any freakin help around this house unless I beg and throw a fit. He is 11 1/2 and I have to remind him EVERY SINGLE DAY to take his medicine (he's been on it since he was 3) and walk the dog. Does the dog have water Alex? Did you brush your teeth Alex? I swear I just want to throw in the towel. I told my son if he hates it here that much fine, go live with your father. now I don't totally feel that way but heck if it's going to be non stop arguing then maybe it's better. This has been going on for at least 2 1/2 years, I am done.

My daughter is just plain horrible. She is a spoiled little high maintenance brat that I honestly can not wait to hide from the second my dh walks through the door. She is rude, mean, talks back, doesn't listen, is greedy, wants everything and will tell you right to your face that she is not going to listen and that we don't get to tell her what to do. I don't want to throw her a birthday party because she doesn';t deserve it. I don't want to buy her presents because she does not deserve it. I want to run away because I have been tortured far to long. The second she opens her mouth I just have the urge to send her to her room.

So this morning I am cleaning her room (she does clean it but I was wiping toys down) and all I can hear is them arguing and then fighting then kicking. Finally I yell for them to come here and 3 times they ignore me (I know they heard me). They were doing this while sitting next to the 2 girls that were sleeping. I just lost it and started screaming ~` seriously my voice hurts. Apparently it does not even affect the 3 girls I am watchingbecause they are all still sound asleep. Madi is in her room and Alex in his now and honestly they can stay there all day long for all I care. I don't even want to deal wtih this. Why can't they just try to get along? Do they hate me? Is this a plot to drive me away? I have the urge to just drive away and never come back to these ungrateful children.

BTW it has gotten to the point where individually I can take them in public but if I have both forget it. It is embarrassing and I end up with a headache. If dh is there it is worse ~ I am the tough one, he is the nice one. I have to plan any running for when someone else has the kids as they drive dh insane at home as well.

Okay, thanks for letting me vent about these children. Advice would be great but I swear I have done nearly everything aside from spanking them (which wouldn't work anyway).

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Old 08-25-2006, 06:47 AM   #2
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Re: Do they hate me????


I can honestly say my kids were MUCh worse when I was pregnant. I think they just know your more tired, you can't move as fast, your just plain end of pregnancy miserable. And I think kids know it. (I never said they cared ). I just got to the point where I would go lay down and let them do thier thing! Now we have a "no yelling around baby" rule.
After Zephyr got here they chilled out, especially my 5 yr. old. Hopefully, the same thing will happen for you.
Oh, I also made my husband stay home from work a few times to help me out at the end when I was in latent labor forever!! I know that isn't always possible.
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Old 08-25-2006, 06:48 AM   #3
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Re: Do they hate me????

Just want to give you a hug. Being a mama can be so hard sometimes.

~Heather
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Old 08-25-2006, 06:59 AM   #4
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Re: Do they hate me????

I am sure that the end of the pregnancy is making it worse plus the fact that school has been out for like 8 weeks or something. My son is so bored and I can not entertain him and I don't feel he is old enough to go out and do things without supervision so he is stuck here with me unless he goes to a friends house. My daughter is just plain bad ~ no excuse for her. I am tired and wore out, just done with it all.

School will start soon as will my daughters classes, the 2 girls I watch will be back in school so that should calm things a bit. It's just like they know and have to drive me as cose to insanity as possible. The hospital stay will be like a mini vacation I swear.
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Old 08-25-2006, 07:05 AM   #5
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Re: Do they hate me????

No advice just sympathy.
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Old 08-25-2006, 08:20 AM   #6
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Re: Do they hate me????

Well I don't have any advice but a ton of sympathy and understanding! School's just around the corner for those who go, so that might give you a bit of relief. I do understand exactly where you're coming from tho'. Some days I truly want to take the car keys and just drive until I can't drive anymore to get away from the noise, the fighting, the knit-picking, the MESS, and the non-help from my DH, and say screw it all! But when we have good days I tend to forget the frustration. Hugs to you during this last part of your pg!! I have been there! (PG & alone with 7 kids with DH out of state truck driving) Just go hide in your room for a mommy time-out when it becomes too crazy, or lock your bathroom door and just sit there, take a bath whatever! Anyway, you'll make it!!
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Old 08-25-2006, 03:02 PM   #7
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Re: Do they hate me????

Dawn!
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Old 08-25-2006, 03:18 PM   #8
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Re: Do they hate me????

oh my goodness you poor thing!! Sounds like you need to leave the kids with dh and go get a massage!!

for your oldest, have you tried a checklist? With my 6 year old, I print out a "responsibility" list each day. He loves it! Each list has the day's date and a checkbox for each item -- brush teeth, empty dishwasher, do one math lesson, one piano practice, etc. I also put anything special on each day, like swimming lessons, etc. I put the list on a clipboard and he LOVES it, he races around doing things so he can check them off. He feels more in control and it's like the list is the bad guy, not me. I don't have to nag, I just ask how the list is going.

For my son, the pure joy of getting the list done is reward enough, but you might want to add some extra motivation for your little guy, such as 1 star sticker for each finished checklist, and 10 star stickers earned = 1 dinner at chuck e cheese, one special toy, one ice cream store trip with mom, whatever is important to him.

just an idea!! hugs to you,
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Old 08-26-2006, 07:14 AM   #9
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Re: Do they hate me????

I tried the checklist thing several times. He forgets to look at the checklist so all day I am saying "Alex. go look at your list". I swear he is sharing a memory with someone and they are very selfish I can not find what works with him except when I lose my mind, then he'll do good for about 2 days.

Anyway, the losing of the mucus plug and contractions yesterday took my mind off them (the kids misbehaving). Although this morning it was right back to the same deal ~ Alex is at his dads for the weekend and Madison is already in her room having a time out. I told dh I give up and I will not leave this house until he returns then I am not coming home until I have everything done and am completely exhausted. Oh, and he is treating me to my pedicure today!!

He realizes I am VERY close to having this baby so he's doing whatever I say and want. Of course he said the STUPIDest thing today ~ he told dd that she can be replaced by the new baby So, I had to talk with her about that and talk with him about his choice of wording Do men just not think before speaking?
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Old 08-26-2006, 08:20 AM   #10
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Re: Do they hate me????

aww im sorry! i cant believe dh said that to her lol poor thing! he sounds very sweet tho! I think our kids know when we are on the edge and act out anyway...they think its entertaining to see us yell! cadence is a very well behaved kid most the time and i know shes only two so i accept it but sometimes she makes me wanna pull out my hair its not really that shes bad shes just energetic and well....annoying LOL you gotta just go in the other room and take a breather....I dont know what to say to help you but you are not alone so many moms just wanna get away sometime...idk if you have youe son help with laundry or anything but do things that will affect him like if he doesnt bring his clothes out they dont get cleaned...stuff like that...
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