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Old 03-07-2008, 06:22 PM   #1
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Bad Parenting due to My Personal Tastes?

Alright, forgive me here, but I really need to vent. One huge peeve I have are closed minded people, you know, the ones that condemn everything you do, because it's different than they would have done? Yeah. Let me give you a little background information here before I jump into this story. I'm almost 25 now, and I have three kids, and this is my second marriage (I get flamed about that sometimes as well haha). I wanted and was ready for kids at a younger age than some though. I have an interest in body modification, so I have a few tattoos and some piercings as well. I'm also not Christian either, I'm actually Dianic, which is a Pagan denomination. Now mind you, I see how neither of these have any effect on how I raise my children, but recently, I've been getting a lot of messages on myspace, from random strangers, criticizing me, for having mody mods, or having different beliefs, and having children as well. The comments have been rather nasty as well. Things like 'What kind of a mother can you be with a face full of metal?'....I have three whole facial piercings, whoopty doo. And things like "You're going to raise your kids believing in that?".....um, no, I plan on raising my kids to embrace and accept all religions and beliefs and to find their own, and not base their beliefs on anyone elses, except for what they feel is right. Now usually, stuff like this doesn't bother me. I live in a somewhat small town, where women with tattoos and piercings are very few and far between. But every once in a while enough is enough! Just ugh. Forgive me if I come off as being really blunt here, but I'm a tad irritated. I went through a really nasty divorce, and was left with nothing, but myself and my two kids, and I busted my butt for a very long time, working and going to school, to try and better myself and provide a good life for my kids. Now a few years later, I have a good career, I have my degree, and I am remarried and very happy. Living the normal, stable, happy family life that I always wanted. I just don't understand how some people can be so insensitive and cruel sometimes. Ok, I think I'm done, I just had to vent a little. Thanks to anyone that made it through this haha

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Old 03-07-2008, 06:27 PM   #2
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Re: Bad Parenting due to My Personal Tastes?

I understand mama. I recently removed my lip piercing, and I have 3 tattoos, 2 of which are pretty in your face (one chest and one forearm), the looks I got from people, were amazing. I had my first child at 21 and 2nd (and final) at 24. I know people much younger than you with 3 children. I don't understand why people are so judgemental, just bc you are older doesn't necessarily mean you are a better parent/more stable/etc etc, whatever their arguments are. I hope that doesn't sound bad, bc I am def not judging you. All that matters is that you are comfortable with your decisions and able to take care of your family. Age really is just a number.
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Old 03-07-2008, 06:35 PM   #3
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Re: Bad Parenting due to My Personal Tastes?

Set your profile to Friends Only!
Strangers don't need to be commenting on your personal life.
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Old 03-07-2008, 06:36 PM   #4
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Originally Posted by OneFabMama View Post
Set your profile to Friends Only!
Strangers don't need to be commenting on your personal life.
Hehe, I just did that a few minutes ago actually. Don't know where they all came from, but man, I got hammered today with all sorts of messages from people I don't know.
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Old 03-07-2008, 06:51 PM   #5
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Hehe, I just did that a few minutes ago actually. Don't know where they all came from, but man, I got hammered today with all sorts of messages from people I don't know.
I'm really sorry to hear that. Obviously, people like that have no lives, and need to make themselves feel better by putting others down.
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Old 03-07-2008, 06:56 PM   #6
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it's just ignorance mama, sadly many people are afraid of what they don't know, yet they are unwilling to be open minded and learn
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Old 03-07-2008, 06:58 PM   #7
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Re: Bad Parenting due to My Personal Tastes?

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it's just ignorance mama, sadly many people are afraid of what they don't know, yet they are unwilling to be open minded and learn
Which makes me even more determined to raise my kids around diversity in every form possible, so they have that acceptance and respect for all things that are different when they are older.
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Old 03-07-2008, 08:02 PM   #8
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Re: Bad Parenting due to My Personal Tastes?

I'm sorry mama!
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Old 03-07-2008, 08:08 PM   #9
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I'm sorry. I get it alot too. Apparently not being christian automatically makes you a bad parent. Because you know you are condeming your children to hell and all that. I ignore it most of the time too, but it can tend to build up on you. I've got alot of the tatts too. Right now they dont' show unless i want them too, but i have committed to a full sleeve that i am getting very soon. I know that will just up the stares ect, but honestly I don't care. I can't quit being who I am and living my life because other people are afraid of things they don't understand. I tried for a while and it just made me feel so sick inside.
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Old 03-07-2008, 08:12 PM   #10
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I was a teen mom to twins at 16, and older ladies (like in their 60's+) would come up and ask me personal questions and things that were just none of their business! Then I would have the other ladies coming up to me giving me advice on what to do and how to do it and when to do it... like I couldn't figure it out on my own or didn't already have it figured out!
People just feel the need to tell you what they think because they think they're right. It's sad and it's ignorant! Those old ladies thought I was just ignorant but it was truly THEM that was ignorant for judging me and assuming I was just open for their personal questions! It's rude and ignorant for ANYONE to tell you what you should do with your religion and your body! I know it's hard but you just have to have confidence and not let them get to you. They are the ones who feel the need to go questioning others and finding what is wrong in other people instead of what is right. Like the PPs recommended, make your myspace private and delete messages from people you don't know or want to know.
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