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Old 04-01-2008, 08:40 AM   #1
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BFing in not-so-public places

I’m the kind of person that has no problem bf’ing in public. If we’re in a park, restaurant, etc. In fact, one day I brought Lisy in to work and I started bf’ing her and my coworker closed the door to our office. She said she didn’t want to make the “boys” feel uncomfortable. Um, I would think most doctors wouldn’t be uncomfortable around a nursing child but maybe she thought because it was me and my boob it was different than a patient’s??

So anyways I’m fine with doing it in public, but I have to admit that when we either have company over or when I go to someone’s house, I’m always kind of hesitant about it. I guess because it’s such an enclosed space that I feel more exposed (though I try to be discreet). Plus, I guess a part of me doesn’t want to make anyone feel uncomfortable in my home or to be rude and do it in theirs in case they might feel it’s rude. Heck maybe my b##ch of a SIL just made me adopt that mentality because of her stupidity (long story ). Actually, my family is a little boob-aphobic too because if they see that I’m nursing, the get all sorts of uncomfortable. They don’t say it, but I can tell. Well actually, the kids DO say it, lol.

So anyways I’m curious as to how others feel about this. Non-bf’ers, are you offended if someone bf’s in your house or when you’re over theirs? BF’ers do you bf in these situations? I guess I’m also a little lucky in that if I feel I have to slip into the room momentarily, I can, since my dds have only needed about 5 minutes to get full. I know some kids need like a good half hour or so…no way would I be locking myself in a room for that long!

PS. Sorry, if this is posted in the wrong spot, I didn’t know if this belonged in “BF Support” or not, since I’m not really looking for “support”


Mellie, wife to Malik (married happily since 12/3/05) , Momma to Micaela, the petite sange (3/11/06) , and Talise, the Koala (8/4/07)
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Old 04-01-2008, 08:51 AM   #2
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Re: BFing in not-so-public places

I think my family used to be uncomfortable and I used to be more careful about not having to do it in public but I been bfing for so long- I guess I've gotten over it. It was weird to nurse in front of my Dad but a baby has to eat- kwim? My 3 week old nurses for about 25 minutes and I'm not locking myself away for that long- especially in my own home. I will only nurse my 2 1/2 year old in front of our family and my Mom though- and it isn't necessary for me to nurse him in public.
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Old 04-01-2008, 08:55 AM   #3
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Re: BFing in not-so-public places

I have nursed everywhere. And I think I have only covered up with a blanket a few times, such as when were at the parade, and that was only because he was getting too distracted when things would go by.
If someone is in my home, too bad for them. it is my home and I do not need to hide. I am small chested so nothing is really showing, but I do not need to cover up. After all I do not eat with a blanket over my head, and I do not make guests eat like that either.
I am the same at someone else's house too.
Even my Grandpa (when he was alive) didn't seem to care, or want to say anything.

And for the record, I am the only "breastfeeder" in my family.
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Old 04-01-2008, 09:05 AM   #4
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Re: BFing in not-so-public places

I've nursed everywhere as well. Even in front of my dad...modestly. My mom freaked out--but good ol' oblivious dad didn't even know Sam was nursing.. he thought he was just asleep. I've nursed in Time Square and Union Square... I've nursed on boats and airplanes... but always modestly just because that's something I care about... not that I care what other people think. I don't do the "hooter hider" thing... but if I KNOW I might have to nurse in public I wear a nursing shirt to cover my belly at least.
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Old 04-01-2008, 09:09 AM   #5
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Re: BFing in not-so-public places

I do it anyway. Sometimes I feel a little uncomfortable doing it, just because I don't want a bad reaction from them. But I feel so adamantly about not treating nursing as a private act and not covering that I can't not do it.
The ONLY exception is a couple of DH's extended family members.... Because they're recent immigrants and Muslim men, and I think they'd be very uncomfortable.
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Old 04-01-2008, 09:16 AM   #6
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Re: BFing in not-so-public places

I am pretty comfortable nursing in public. It is getting a little more difficult these days b/c DS is a fidgety nurser who pops on and off alot. I can not use a blanket or anything b/c it makes him hot and mad so that just draws more attention to us!

In my own home, I will nurse whenever and wherever, whether we have company or not. I really don't invite people to my home that I would not feel comfortable nursing around. Everyone in my life knows that we EBF and are accepting of it. Although it does make my stepdad really uncomfortable but that is his problem.

In others houses, I guess it depends on who it is. I have several friends that used to BF so I feel fine BFing at their houses, even in front of their husbands. I feel the same way when I am at work at the daycare center. For a place that is populated be small children, it really makes alot of the staff and parents freak out if the see me. I usally hide in my office but if some one walks in to find me, they get all weird and nervous.

I don't really care who see me. The more people see women BFing in public, the more "NORMAL" it will become. Breast's primary purpose is food not to be sexual.
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Old 04-01-2008, 09:16 AM   #7
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Re: BFing in not-so-public places

I do throw a blanket over myself if I can, but DS hates it and swings his arm around so much it just comes off. I think if it is my house, or my parents/ILs, I should be able to do what I want in front of close family. When extended family is over, like a big holiday party and stuff, I go to a private room unless it is my house, then I just go to the room with the kids in it since mostly moms are in there anyway.

My dad and FIL make a point not to look in my direction, I can tell. I don't care if they see something, but DH did come put a blanket on me the other day when he could apparently see more than he thought his dad should see. It all depends on your relationship with these people.

When it isn't me doing the BFing, and it's another woman, I just have gotten so used to it that I only look at her face anyway, so I definitely don't feel uncomfortable.
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Old 04-01-2008, 09:23 AM   #8
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Re: BFing in not-so-public places

Let someone say something to me!! No one has but God help them if they do! I will never understand why I can't say something to a parent that has a bottle propped up in the carseat and they gab away oblivous!
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Old 04-01-2008, 09:52 AM   #9
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Re: BFing in not-so-public places

A lot of it depends on whose house I'm at. With some friends, I'll just ask to go to the bedroom, especially if I know that they haven't BF. We had some friends over the other night, and DD got hungry during dinner. I moved to the easy chair, just cause it's easier and kept a blanket over her body and mine. No one could see anything, and I was able to converse with everyone at the table (one big dining/living room).

We are going to visit DH's family in a few weeks, so I may or may not get comments about it. They aren't used to it, but I BF DS for almost 17 months and they know it, so they may not say anything.
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Old 04-01-2008, 10:02 AM   #10
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Re: BFing in not-so-public places

With DS the only time I went to a different room was when we were still learning everything (the first few weeks) After we both got the hang of it, I just used a blanket. As DS got older I was able to have the blanket on him to appear like he was covered but not on his head, so I guess it was like a shield for those in front of me, but I had complete access and visibility. with my Mom and sister I never covered up. But I respect that others may not want to see. But that doesn't mean I'm going to stop.
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