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Old 03-20-2008, 05:18 PM   #1
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how do i stop my weaned toddler from touching me

My ds is 26 months old and gropes me every time he is close enough. I weaned him at 20 months before he was ready but I was 6 months prego and could not stand it anymore. I was completly dry and it hurt and the way he was nursing made my skin crawl he was just fliking the nipple.
now dd is born the this has gotten even worse then before he screams if he can not touch them 2 handed, finding the nipple rubbing, jiggling them it is so digusting. there is nothing he does that pushes my buttons more i am ashamed to say i do not act like a grownup trying to get him to stop.
he wants to nurse but has forgotton how, that does not bother me I would hve and wanted to tandem nurse but could not get thru the pregnancy.
any advice? this has me not wanting to be close to him.

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Old 03-20-2008, 05:23 PM   #2
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Re: how do i stop my weaned toddler from molesting me

First he is not molesting you he is doing this for comfort!
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Old 03-20-2008, 05:27 PM   #3
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Re: how do i stop my weaned toddler from molesting me

eeek i dont know how you can call your toddler touching you molesting you????

no advice when you talk to him about it what does he say?
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Old 03-20-2008, 05:31 PM   #4
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Re: how do i stop my weaned toddler from molesting me

Honestly, I think every toddler goes through a b@@b fascination stage...regardless of when they were weaned. At this point it is probably more for the attention than anything.

I'll never forget walking in the mall and having my long since weaned 2 yr old put his hand on my "chest" and give me a cheshire grin. I was so embarrassed! ETA: He was doing it to see what my reaction would be.

Here is what I have done with both my older dc's when they decide to grab me. lol I just remove the hand and say "Don't touch. Those aren't yours." I try to say it seriously with a straight face. I think it isn't as fun when there isn't a big reaction. If it happens again I set them down. Neither one of my kids ever did it more than a handful of times (that I remember).

If you are holding him and he does it I would put him down and explain that you don't like that. Be consistant and put him down every time it happens so he knows you won't hold him if he does it. I think it is important for dc's to know that you are in charge of your body.

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Old 03-20-2008, 05:32 PM   #5
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Re: how do i stop my weaned toddler from molesting me

ok i told you i am not as grownupas i would like about this. Molestation means to bother. I know I have become a lovey but it seriously makes my gut tiighten and my skin crawl. He occasionally asks to nurse and I have no problem with this but he does not know how and can not latch on.
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Old 03-20-2008, 05:34 PM   #6
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Re: how do i stop my weaned toddler from molesting me

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ok i told you i am not as grownupas i would like about this. Molestation means to bother. I know I have become a lovey but it seriously makes my gut tiighten and my skin crawl. He occasionally asks to nurse and I have no problem with this but he does not know how and can not latch on.
Then I would DEFINATLY change your question to "bother"

molestation n. the crime of sexual acts with children up to the age of 18, including touching of private parts, exposure of genitalia, taking of ****ographic pictures, rape, inducement of sexual acts with the molester or with other children, and variations of these acts by pedophiles. Molestation also applies to incest by a relative with a minor family member, and any unwanted sexual acts with adults short of rape.
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Old 03-20-2008, 05:35 PM   #7
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Re: how do i stop my weaned toddler from molesting me

He does not do this occasionally it is everytime he is near enough when I lay down with him in bed he has his hands firmly planted, I try to put my arm over and he screams and digs in to get my arm away. His speech is not good enough for us to have a dialoge.
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Old 03-20-2008, 05:37 PM   #8
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Re: how do i stop my weaned toddler from molesting me

My son that just turned 3 has recently started to find my boobs fun to touch and be near too but I don't for one moment call it molesting. He knows I am pregnant and the scent of my skin being pregnant is what he is used to like when he was nursing. Which by the way I weaned him at 28 months. So thats 8 months hes not nursed but all of a sudden he finds them fascinating again. While I don't like that he grabs them all the time and lifts my shirt at any given moment to be close to my boobs I just laugh it off. I mean come on hes missing what used to be his! I think that because Ashton was forced to wean instead of me letting him self wean as I had wanted to thats why he still finds interest in them. I wouldn't yell at him or shove him away by any means though! Ask him what is he doing and find out what he finds so interesting about them. Hes still a baby and since you had to wean him when he wasn't ready to be weaned this seems totally normal to me and NOT molesting!
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Old 03-20-2008, 05:39 PM   #9
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Re: how do i stop my weaned toddler from molesting me

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Then I would DEFINATLY change your question to "bother"

molestation n. the crime of sexual acts with children up to the age of 18, including touching of private parts, exposure of genitalia, taking of ****ographic pictures, rape, inducement of sexual acts with the molester or with other children, and variations of these acts by pedophiles. Molestation also applies to incest by a relative with a minor family member, and any unwanted sexual acts with adults short of rape.

that is one meaning of the word the other meaning is simply "to bother" but honestly because it is on the nipple that is what makes me cringe. I use that word because it is the portrays the intensity of my feelings. I apoligize if that offends people I felt that somebody must have dealt with this same problem.
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Old 03-20-2008, 05:44 PM   #10
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Re: how do i stop my weaned toddler from molesting me

She used the word correctly.

Quote:
Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1) - Cite This Source - Share This
mo·lest / Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[muh-lest] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation
–verb (used with object)
1. to bother, interfere with, or annoy.
2. to make indecent sexual advances to.
3. to assault sexually.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[Origin: 1325–75; ME molesten < L molestāre to irk, deriv. of molestus irksome; cf. mōlés mass, burden, trouble]

—Related forms
mo·les·ta·tion / Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[moh-le-stey-shuhn, mol-e-] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation, noun
mo·lest·er, noun
mo·lest·ful, adjective


—Synonyms 1. harass, harry, trouble, plague, hector, torment. See attack.
Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1)
Based on the Random House Unabridged Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2006.
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