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Old 04-07-2008, 09:28 PM   #11
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Re: Mom's of young teen girls.. need some advice..

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Originally Posted by *Alabamamom* View Post
You must tell me HOW you did it?!?!
Well it wasn't always nice. I'd tell her if she wanted to go anywhere with me the jacket came off or she stayed home.I mean she stuck out more with it on than without it.
I also told her that if she wore it(like when the sun went down) that she had to at least unzip it below her chin neck.
I also think more of her friends are developing so that may have helped too.

When will your DD be 13?

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Old 04-07-2008, 09:44 PM   #12
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Re: Mom's of young teen girls.. need some advice..

Could you try the built-in bra type of tanks as as a compromise? That way she would not have to wear an extra, separate piece of clothing, and you could feel like you were making progress? Best to you and to her!
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Old 04-07-2008, 09:54 PM   #13
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Re: Need some advice on my dd..

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Well it wasn't always nice. I'd tell her if she wanted to go anywhere with me the jacket came off or she stayed home.I mean she stuck out more with it on than without it.
I also told her that if she wore it(like when the sun went down) that she had to at least unzip it below her chin neck.
I also think more of her friends are developing so that may have helped too.

When will your DD be 13?
Well, I first told her last year I could see where she's developing under her shirts.. she didn't want to face that.. I pressed on got her bras.. she immediately threw out that idea.. then I tried sport bras, even plain old tank tops figuring it would be better than nothing. Soon after that she began wearing the jackets.. and it was still hot outside too! I didn't know what to make of it the first couple weeks, she always said she was cold.. I figured it out though.. She will be 13 in July.. I can't believe she's growing up.. I mean knew it was gonna happen, but she's my baby girl..
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Old 04-07-2008, 09:56 PM   #14
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Re: Need some advice on my dd..

I guess I'm trying to figure out if I should just leave her alone and let her do this at her own rate, or should I push her until she listens? I just don't want to give her any mental hangups in the longrun, she's at such a critical age... not to mention hormonal as heck! ack!
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Old 04-07-2008, 09:56 PM   #15
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Re: Mom's of young teen girls.. need some advice..

I like the idea of a gift cert. to Victoria Secret... or maybe she has an aunt or her older sis or other older female friend that can help her go shopping? I remember my mom buying all my underwear & bras for me until I moved out.. and I didn't like her tastes but had no say in the matter of what I would like to wear.

Thankfully, mine aren't developing yet (11 & almost 10)... I had to wear a bra starting in in 5th grade and was a B cup by 7th grade! I don't ever remembering not wanting to wear one though... Maybe it was because mom said so?

good luck! and know that peer pressure (and the summer heat!) will get her to make the necessary changes!
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Old 04-07-2008, 10:00 PM   #16
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Re: Mom's of young teen girls.. need some advice..

Mama, she doesn't need mental counseling, I remember when I first started my period I wasn't about to tell my mom, the only reason she knew I started my period was because I had to ask her for help on how to make a pad stick in my undies.

She is probably embarressed, and if I were you I would just leave a few bras in her room for her....maybe nothing frilly, how about a sports bra...since she is tomboyish.

If you don't know her bra size I would leave her a few different ones in a few different sizes and then you'll know what size she is by what ones she wears and what ones she doesn't.

I know it might hurt that your little girl doesn't want to talk to you about this stuff, but it is embarressing and I hope that this helps a little

Also if her boobs aren't that big, you could always get her a bunch of tank tops that have built in bras ( I know there is no support in those, but it will hide her privates from showing through shirts).

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Old 04-07-2008, 10:14 PM   #17
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Re: Mom's of young teen girls.. need some advice..

You've already gotten a lot of great advice. About the only other thing I could think to suggest is maybe write her a note/letter???? Instead of an awkward conversation, you could let her know that you've been there/done this all before. And when she needs you, you'll be there. Then again maybe a informative book -- something along the lines of what to expect. So she could reference it if needed.

It could also be the second child syndrome. Since she has seen her sister go through this it might not be that big of deal.

I'm glad I get to live in denial for a few more years (mine are only 4.5 & 2yrs old)


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Old 04-07-2008, 10:23 PM   #18
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Re: Mom's of young teen girls.. need some advice..

She will be 13 in July..
My DD will be 13 July 6th.
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Old 04-07-2008, 10:54 PM   #19
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Re:Need some advice on my dd..

All of you are amazing! I really appreciate all the feedback.. I wasn't even sure if I should post this, but I'm so glad I did.. you all have given so many great suggestions so thank you so much!

Sharon, too weird that we are almost living the same life with these girls! Her bday is July 12th.. Does your dd like to penpal? Mine writes letters to 4 right now, one in Canada, one in Kentucky and 2 in California.. If you think yours will be intersted to pp, throw me a PM.. It seems they have LOTS in common and might hit it off pretty well!
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Old 04-07-2008, 11:07 PM   #20
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Re: Mom's of young teen girls.. need some advice..

Sounds like my daughter too! She finally has stopped fighting the bra thing but usually wears camis instead. I just buy them for her in every color! LOL! She wears them layered or under shirts. Also gets very embaressed over the period thing too. When I was a teen we referred to it as "George". That way no one else knew what we were referring to. Need supplies for george etc. She will come around. My dd is 13 1/2 now and soooo much better! Takes a while to adjust to all the changes. Be as subtle as possible. Just buy the cami's and put them in her room. My son is another story! He is having an awful time about growing up. He has asperger's syndrome though which makes the problem worse. Soooo frustrating I know!
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