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Old 09-11-2006, 10:16 PM   #41
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Re: BIG daycare issue- WWYD?

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Originally Posted by yaka111
I would be mad. I have done daycare at my house for over a year now, and I would never feed anything that the parents didnt approve of. Especially formula if I have been told ONLY bm....And the juice/puffs thing, boy that is wrong wrong wrong...if you told her before NO, then NO MEANS NO! No matter what. I would find another provider, she may have your babies best interest at heart, but she is ignoring your specific requests. If you hadnt been early, she would have given formula, and who knows if she did it in the past and just didnt tell you??

Like I said, I am sure she means well, but you are mommy, and her employer! If you say NO, it means NO..no matter what!
Thats just mho!
wow. so you would let the baby sit there and cry until mommy gets there? The DCP called her and she did not answer her phone. The DCP had no idea if she was on her way or not! I am sorry but I think the DCP was only doing what she thought was best and that is better then doing nothing at all
and letting that baby cry it out!

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Old 09-11-2006, 10:26 PM   #42
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Re: BIG daycare issue- WWYD?

I wanted to chime in and give my opinion! I will get flamed because I hate formula so much! I am a DCP, and I have a BF baby that I am watching right now. I will feed her what he mom wants me to and nothing else! There are other ways of calming a baby than to feed them... How about going on a trip outside in a backyard?

I am VERY ANTI FORMULA! I can't stress that enough! I think that it should be only allowed under a Dr. prescription. I know that is a stretch but there are many other things that you can do if you have no BM (YK like lack of supply) There are milk banks/ other mamma's who would be willing to give milk. And with the right testing, would be safer than formula... If you think I am wrong I don't care, that is how I feel... And yes, I had supply issues and I struggled so BAD!

I think that the support in this post is awful! A mamma is not asking if it is good or bad to give formula (I was posting so you knew where I am coming from)

Anyway, I have an almost 2 year old who BF (he is mine) and if someone fed him formula I would have gone bezerk! I had a DCP that ran out of BM one day during a growth spurt very early and she called me at work. I took off early to go and be with him and to BF.

I know that most of what I wrote has no meaning in your case but I just wanted to let you know that what she did was wrong and you have every right to be mad! When I had my son in daycare, I brought everything that he was allowed to eat. She knew that if I didn't bring it, he wasn't allowed to have it PERIOD! Not even just one bite. And about the puffs, my son hasn't had them yet so hell NO, you have every right to not feed what you want. On the other relm of things, I have parents that want their DC to eat crap and I feed that to them as well... I am not their parents and I don't make decisons without the parents permission!

I hope that makes you feel better. I wish you were closer, I would watch you children. BTW, if she gives a bottle of BM, does she know not to microwave it? And what about a sippy cup of milk, could she try that? I just can't believe with one unanswered phone call, she would give formula!

I don't know if I would change or not, I would sit down and go over everything with her... Like detailed. Diapers, changes of clothes, solids, other #'s to call and ask before doing anything rash...

I like many other mothers on this board have to fight daily to feed their children the way that we feel is right for our family... Strong opinion or not, that is the way we want it and this mamma should be not talked down to. DUHHHHH... What parent would leave their children with no foodthere or on the OK list? What parent wouldn't want to sneak up on the DCP to make sure that she was doing everything like asked? I would and I would honor parents that do... Just because she didn't state in her first post how many diapers she left with the DCP doesn't mean that she left none.

Let the PM's fly...
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Old 09-11-2006, 10:27 PM   #43
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Re: BIG daycare issue- WWYD?

Like I said before, I don't practice CIO and I don't on DCC but she said that the baby wasn't crying just fussy... I mean what baby isn't sometimes?
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Old 09-11-2006, 10:28 PM   #44
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Re: BIG daycare issue- WWYD?

Man, Kissum, maybe you should post on the BF forum. There you might get some support! I can't believe this.
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Old 09-11-2006, 10:30 PM   #45
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Re: BIG daycare issue- WWYD?

Thanks to some of the mammas that DO understand her point... Some of us do believe that one or 2 bottles will HURT! And when it comes to allergies, she is RIGHT!
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Old 09-11-2006, 10:59 PM   #46
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Exclamation Re: BIG daycare issue- WWYD?

I would trust your gut instincts. As a Mom, they are usually right.

With that said, I didn't get to read every post, so if this is a duplicate, I am sorry. Make sure that you clearly explain to her the the breastmilk cannot go in the micro. LOTS of formula users do it for formula, even though the can says not to. Even if you have to write it on the bags the milk is in as a reminder it is worth it. My Mom almost made this mistake when watching my DD, but luckily my sister came over and caught her in time. I HAD told my mom, but it slipped her mind. When DD needed fed and it was frozen, she just assumed she was doing th eright thing to get her the food fast.

As far as the diapers go, I don't know how you will be able to tell with that one. Maybe try to pop in unexpectedly once or twice? I am sure that would be hard for a working Mom, though.

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Old 09-12-2006, 11:32 AM   #47
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Re: BIG daycare issue- WWYD?

I might make some enemys here but I can not beleive the lack of support for this mama. MY DD is Exclusivly BF and will NOT get a drop of Formula unless something happens to me. NOBODY has the right to make that kind of decision for you child except you. There are other ways of calming down a baby besides food. This DCP should have tried singing, dancing, walking out side, using a sling rocking, changing her diaper anything but formula. I guess some people don't releize how important the breastfeeding relationship is to a mom and her child.

I would have cried if someone gave my DD formula. My DD will not take a bottle and shes going to be in DC. And the DCP KNOWS that she could get cranky and cry and there might not be anything she can do. But guess what? my child and me are her boss. We are paying her.

What if the DCP had given bella formula? She's dairy intolerant and can't take it in breastmilk so if she was given cowsmilk based formula it could have made her sick enough to go to the hospital. Was the DCP going to take responsibality for it?

I dont think a DCP has any right to introduce anything new to a young baby for fear of allergies.

I have more to say but right now Im just to shocked
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Old 09-12-2006, 11:40 AM   #48
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Re: BIG daycare issue- WWYD?

WOW there is someone that is sad for this mamma too. Thanks!
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Old 09-12-2006, 02:28 PM   #49
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Re: BIG daycare issue- WWYD?

I would have been pretty upset myself, too, in this situation.

*But* there is a super easy solution that will prevent it from ever being a problem again (well, at least the formula problem) and that is to leave some BM with the dcp even if you are only gone for 30 min. Even if it's just 1 oz, it will be enough for the dcp to reassure herself that your dd isn't starving to death. It may seem silly to you, but if your dcp thinks the baby is hungry, she probably won't relax and just accept the fussiness until she's made sure it's not the problem.

My DS flat out won't take a bottle. My mom watches him every once in a while - when he was younger and I went into the office 2 afternoons a week it was more often. I *always* planned my time to nurse him before I left, and as soon as I got home, and was only gone for 4 hours, which I knew he could manage without a feeding. But even knowing all this, I always left a little pumped milk in the freezer with my mom, and a bottle or sippy cup, just in case. Even though I knew that he wouldn't take it from anything but me, I didn't want her unable to get a hold of me, convinced that the baby was starving, with no milk. Even now that he eats lots of other things, I still make sure that she has a couple bags that are still useable in the freezer, just in case.

I bag my pumped milk in 2 oz portions so that if someone does decide to use some "just to check" not much goes down the drain.

As far as the Puffs go, are there any easy finger foods that you can leave with her? I buy organic wheat/soy/dairy free cheerios, crackers and cookies for my ds at the health food store, and just keep them in the diaper bag in a little ziplock. Even though I feed him fresh fruits and vegetables and organic stuff here at home, I realize that it is sometime easier for my mom to have something that she can just hand him without a lot of advance prep. Realistically, it's not going to hurt him to get baby junk food occasionally, as long as I make sure it is ok as far as his allergies are concerned.

I'm not sure what to tell you about diaper changes. My mom doesn't change him as often as I'd like either, and I've never brought it up to her. When he is rashy or threatening to be, I'll mention that she should change him extra, but otherwise I just let it be. If it was a paid babysitter, I might ask her to change on a schedule, regardless of how wet he is. It can be harder for mamas who don't cd to tell when a cd is wet, since they don't get smooshy like sposies do.
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Old 09-12-2006, 09:26 PM   #50
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Re: BIG daycare issue- WWYD?

Wow! I agree with greenkmt that some of the posts here seem alittle much!!

As a mom who detests formula & the companies, etc, I would be outraged if anyone gave my son formula... I made this clear & even asked my sister to please share her & my nephews breastmilk with Zander, should anything happen to me...

As a former home childcare provider, I cared for a little girl who's mom was partly vegitarian... I & the other kids ate these foods, but I would never have given her beef/pork...

You are the mom! Make your feeling clear, write it all down if you need to... things she can have, things she can't... bring along some things she can have, labeled with her name, to help make it easier for the caregiver... extra bm is a great idea & since she has a hard time taking it, put just a little, maybe one ounce in each bag/bottle, so it's not all waisted if she doesn't take it...

And in the end, you are the mom, the boss! If it doesn't feel right, look around, maybe you can find a better match... good childcare is hard to find, as you know, but it's also one of the most important decisions you'll ever make... this person is helping care for your most precious gift!!
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