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Old 09-13-2006, 08:06 AM   #1
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Very Depressed

I posted this somewhere else, but wanted to post here too to get your thoughts. tell me I am not loony.

Ok, here goes. all of my fears hanging out there, lol.

I have been very depressed the past few days. Instead of being happy that we are expecting #3, I am just in tears because dh has made it absolutly clear that there will be NO more kids after this. he is DONE. I haven't been able to sway him at all, he will not budge.

I don't know why I am having a hard time with this. the fact that I will be done having children at age 31. what will I do?? this is all I know, I love my kids and when they grow up and go away I am going to be lost. I feel like part of my heart and soul has been ripped out and all I can do is cry about it.

Is this just pregnancy hormones or is it normal to feel this way? I just can't fathom being "done"

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Old 09-13-2006, 08:13 AM   #2
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Re: Very Depressed

I do think your hormones are playing a big role in this. I too would be depressed if hubby was saying he is done... He says it now sometimes, but he is not like Super serious.

I think you should try to enjoy this pregnancy, especially if it is your last, and notice all the little things..

I hope you hubby ill be swayed, but for now since he seems serious, he might be.

Please try to relax, and who knows what the future holds. I hope you can have anohter baby, but maybe after the baby is born you wil have the done feeling too. I dont think the done feeling coes during pregnacy, but after you have a baby, ( for the mom)

I feel like i am rambling and making so sense, so i will stop. LOL Its too erly to think...
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Old 09-13-2006, 08:17 AM   #3
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Re: Very Depressed

well, he wasn't even sure he wanted a third child but we obviously had an "oopsie" and now we are having #3.
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Old 09-13-2006, 08:34 AM   #4
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Re: Very Depressed

Our #3 was an 'oops' also. Dh was supposed to get the V, he kept putting it off and as soon as I had the baby I forbid him too. I went an got an iud(that I hated) just to keep him from doing it. I was not sure I wanted another, but I can't imagine giving up that option at least. Now here we are on #4 and I told him it is ok to get it, but do it now before I'm holding a lil newborn and change my mind. He keeps putting it off now, I overheard him telling a friend what if he wants another at 40 lol. I think he is secretly waiting for the US results.
It is a tough feeling to deal with. I was so sure dh was done after Hazy I would secretly cry all the time just thinking of never having another baby. Like I said though, not even sure I DO want more. I just want to know that I CAN.
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Old 09-13-2006, 08:39 AM   #5
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Re: Very Depressed

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Originally Posted by hfitz5051
Our #3 was an 'oops' also. Dh was supposed to get the V, he kept putting it off and as soon as I had the baby I forbid him too. I went an got an iud(that I hated) just to keep him from doing it. I was not sure I wanted another, but I can't imagine giving up that option at least. Now here we are on #4 and I told him it is ok to get it, but do it now before I'm holding a lil newborn and change my mind. He keeps putting it off now, I overheard him telling a friend what if he wants another at 40 lol. I think he is secretly waiting for the US results.
It is a tough feeling to deal with. I was so sure dh was done after Hazy I would secretly cry all the time just thinking of never having another baby. Like I said though, not even sure I DO want more. I just want to know that I CAN.

I know what you mean. I am pretty sure that 3 will be enough for me, but there is always that "what if". I have always wanted a little girl with curly red hair. I have curly hair and red hair skips every other generation. I would want one more chance to have that. ug, it is almost like giving up a dream. I know I can't "make" it happen.
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Old 09-13-2006, 08:43 AM   #6
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Re: Very Depressed

Terri try perming and dyeing!!

ok just kidding.. but you know how i feel..

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Old 09-13-2006, 08:45 AM   #7
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Re: Very Depressed

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Terri try perming and dyeing!!

ok just kidding.. but you know how i feel..


LOL, thanks for lightening the situation
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Old 09-13-2006, 08:51 AM   #8
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Re: Very Depressed

*Hugs* to you Mama I completely understand how you feel! I go through this now in a sense...we just had #2 and I'm not sure I want anymore, but everytime I thought this *might* be my last through the pregnancy I got very upset and emotional...still do...I know right now I am happy w/ our family, but "what if", it's that darn "what if"

We did not "plan" either of the boys, God did (hope I don't offend you if you aren't religious) What helps me feel better is realizing that if it is in God's plans I will have another baby as I have had these two and if it isn't then I won't.

Everytime you get upset about the thought give your kiddo's a big hug and kiss...they always seem to make everything better
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Old 09-13-2006, 09:17 AM   #9
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Re: Very Depressed

I'm sorry mama!

I am the one that says I'm done. I'm pretty sure that DH is too, but he hasnt' said it, and I think if he actually SAID it that I would feel sad. If everything works out with this pregnancy, I'm getting my tubes tied. If we have a m/c, then I know we'll try again...

3 kids is enough for me. This is already pg #5 for me, and i 'm just not sure that my body will take much more.

HUGE HUGS TO YOU!
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Old 09-13-2006, 09:22 AM   #10
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Re: Very Depressed

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Originally Posted by Shaysbabygirls
I'm sorry mama!

I am the one that says I'm done. I'm pretty sure that DH is too, but he hasnt' said it, and I think if he actually SAID it that I would feel sad. If everything works out with this pregnancy, I'm getting my tubes tied. If we have a m/c, then I know we'll try again...

3 kids is enough for me. This is already pg #5 for me, and i 'm just not sure that my body will take much more.

HUGE HUGS TO YOU!

this is pregnancy #5 for me too. I am also so early that I don't even know that this pregnancy will survive until I am farther along.

my body is also worn out. It is just hard to say, done, no more that is it.
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