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Old 09-20-2006, 11:22 AM   #1
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Unhappy Co-sleeping is not working so well anymore :(

DS is 7 1/2 months old and what has been working well for us up to this point with sleep arrangements is that he goes to sleep in his crib when he initially goes to sleep, and then when he wakes up for a feed he spends the rest of the night in bed with us.

Before he would go back to sleep after nursing and everyone would get plenty of sleep. Now however, he's totally restless when he feeds, keeps kicking me and tossing and turning and won't go back to sleep! All the fussing about keeps everyone awake! Often he starts crying.

What I've been having to do out of frustration is to put him back in his crib, on his tummy, since that's how he likes to sleep now and he goes right back to sleep almost right away!

I don't get it, does he just not like to sleep with us anymore? I guess maybe some babies sleep better alone?
I don't know if there's anything I can really do about it...has anyone else had this experience? I'm just sad that he doesn't seem to like mommy and daddy's bed anymore

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Old 09-20-2006, 11:47 AM   #2
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Re: Co-sleeping is not working so well anymore :(

I have co slept with all my kids and all were the same way. My baby girl is almost 7 months and she is now starting this. I think after a while some babies want their own space to move around and sleep their own way. We have a 'pack n play" play yard at the end of my bed that she sleeps in and I sleep at that end now too since we have no headboard. Works out for us. she is still in my room where I can see and hear her but she has her own little space to sprawl out. roll around and get in one of her many sleep positions without any problems.
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Old 09-20-2006, 12:24 PM   #3
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Re: Co-sleeping is not working so well anymore :(

Yeah, I have a much older friend who has 4 kids. 3 of them slept with her until they were like, 5 or 6, and one did NOT want to be touched at all if she was sleeping. So every child is different. We didn't buy a crib b/c we wanted to co-sleep, but we did keep the money in the account for a little while, because we knew we had to get to know our son and figure out if HE wanted to co-sleep first. Of course, now he refuses to sleep unless he's cuddled up to my breast, so we got our answer there. lol
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Old 09-20-2006, 12:59 PM   #4
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Re: Co-sleeping is not working so well anymore :(

My ds doesn't much care to be cuddled when he sleeps - he will actually push my hand away in his sleep if I lay it on him or stroke his hair. He tends to scoot around alot and flips sideways (which means that he ends up cuddled when he doesn't want to be). We put a tube pillow I sewed wrapped in a folded blanket to keep it in place (but a rolled up towel or blanket sandwiched in the fold would work just as well) to give him his own space still in our bed (he sleeps next to me with a bed rail on the other side). He can still scoot out over the top or even crawl or roll over it (and does if I don't wake up right away).

I start the blanket at chest level for him, to it's easy to just roll over and nurse without lifting him out or moving anything out of the way. DS nurses every couple hours at night, so having him even in a sidecar would dramatically decrease the amount of sleep I get. Since he will slowly turn sideways (edging his way out the top) in his sleep, I roll over, scoot him back into his space, and nurse him each time he wakes up (usually without waking up all the way myself) - it prevents him from getting all turned around, and I actually find that sometimes he will fall right back to sleep (without nursing!) once I scoot him back into his little bed area.

It also stops the "so they all rolled over and one fell out" syndrome that was plaguing my dh and turning him off of co-sleeping. Now we're *all* happy with the shared bed.
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Old 09-20-2006, 01:54 PM   #5
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Re: Co-sleeping is not working so well anymore :(

My second ds was like that. He DID NOT sleep well with us! On his own however, he could sleep through the night from 8wks on.
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Old 09-21-2006, 10:31 AM   #6
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Re: Co-sleeping is not working so well anymore :(

Well I will try and give him a bit more of his own sleeping space and see if that helps

I really wish that we had a king size bed now!
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Old 09-21-2006, 11:08 PM   #7
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Re: Co-sleeping is not working so well anymore :(

To me, all this is saying is that you have done your job perfectly. He knows that when he needs you, you will be there, so he is not scared to handle some things on his own. He wants a little independance, which is exactly how he should be at this age!

If it helps any, DS is the exact same way and I've been upset too. My 6 month old would rather sleep alone. He's in his PnP, our heads are literally about 2 feet from each other. I know he's safe. Part of me is heartbroken, the other part is just in awe. He trusts me enough to sleep by himself. It's a crazy feeling!

WTG mama! You're doing great!
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Old 09-22-2006, 09:53 AM   #8
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Re: Co-sleeping is not working so well anymore :(

Thanks Tiffany!

That makes me look at things with a different perspective and makes me feel better about it

I'm just amazed at this age HOW MUCH they change from day to day!
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Old 09-22-2006, 09:57 AM   #9
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Re: Co-sleeping is not working so well anymore :(

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tiffer23
To me, all this is saying is that you have done your job perfectly. He knows that when he needs you, you will be there, so he is not scared to handle some things on his own. He wants a little independance, which is exactly how he should be at this age!

WTG mama! You're doing great!
That is what I was thinking. My dd does better in her own crib now, but she knows I'm there if she needs me. All that cuddle time early on helped with that.
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Old 09-22-2006, 09:58 AM   #10
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Re: Co-sleeping is not working so well anymore :(

I'd say it's normal, he feels safe is right.

My DS is still a night time cuddler-- but my daughter prefers her spaces so we've set the crib up as a side car sort of deal-- there was another mom who had a good picture of how it works. She'll nap with me and cuddle-- but at night she wants her space.

Or she wants her daddy. Which si funny.... the man who in the beginning (with DS) said there would be no cosleeping.... is the biggest advocate of it now. He'll sleep on the other bed with her sometimes. It's so cute because she just snuggles into him.
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