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Old 06-24-2008, 08:40 AM   #1
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the dentist... (my poor LO...am I the most horrible mommy ever?)

My 6-year old DD has had yearly dental check-ups in the past, but they were with a family practice and basically consisted of the dentist asking to look in her mouth. No biggie. Well we switched insurances so that we could go to a pediatric dentist and she had her first appointment today... and I am so traumatized!

My daughter was great - no tears, no arguments, perfect angel! However, during the course of the cleaning, exam, fluoride treatment, and x-rays (whew, so much stuff for a little one to sit through!) they found not one... but 2 cavities!?! I feel like the worst mother on the entire planet!!!! We've taken very good care of her teeth since she's HAD teeth! She brushes twice a day, etc! I have no idea how this happened all of a sudden!

The worst part... they asked to have her come in for the follow-up to take care of the cavities THIS AFTERNOON!! At 2:30, we're going back. She's totally fine with it and my husband is working from home today so I can leave my 1-year old napping at home with him so I know it's convenient... but I am so traumatized FOR her! My poor baby!


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Old 06-24-2008, 09:27 AM   #2
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Re: the dentist...

I just talked to my friend (who is a good mother!) and she told me that when she went to the dentist at age 7, she had 3 cavities during the same appointment. I know her mom, too, (another good mother!) so I somehow feel slightly better knowing it's not just me! I talked to DH and he said he had trouble with his teeth when he was little so maybe it's his fault genetically or something, hehe. I've only ever had 1 cavity in my ENTIRE life and I was an adult, so I think I am overreacting slightly. I still feel like I want to cry for my poor little girl but I don't feel quite as awful - like I could have done something more to prevent it.

Also, DH offered to take her this afternoon if I can't handle it. Call me pathetic but I might take him up on the offer - My daughter won't do very well if mommy is crying!! He's working from home today and he said he could make up the time this evening if it'll help. Not sure what I'll do yet - part of me thinks I should go with her to "mommy" her and b/c everyone wants their mommy when they're sad!
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Old 06-24-2008, 09:38 AM   #3
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Re: the dentist... (my poor LO...am I the most horrible mommy ever?)

I have heard that some teeth are just predisposed to being weaker and suffering from cavities and the like. I didn't have any cavities until adulthood, I'm ashamed to admit.
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Old 06-24-2008, 09:46 AM   #4
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Re: the dentist... (my poor LO...am I the most horrible mommy ever?)

I have been to both a Pedi dentist and a family practice. The Pedi is more aggressive and will treat EVERYTHING that is or might turn into a cavity. The family practice will be more laid back and watch troubled areas and wait and see. You have to figure out what is best for your family. I prefer the watch and see. But then again my pedi did work with out my consent...

Jenn

PS Push for white fillings in light of recent FDA rulings on mercury ones.
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Old 06-24-2008, 10:20 AM   #5
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Re: the dentist... (my poor LO...am I the most horrible mommy ever?)

honestly, I was like your daughter and my mom is a great mom. I had sooooo many fillings as a kid I can't even remember the number.

So don't beat your self up.
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Old 06-24-2008, 10:26 AM   #6
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Re: the dentist... (my poor LO...am I the most horrible mommy ever?)

I have always taken very good care of my children's teeth......my 2 oldest dd, now 22 & 18 never had cavities as children. My 2 youngest, 2 & 4, both had major cavities at age 2. Different dad, different genetics in play.
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Old 06-24-2008, 10:29 AM   #7
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Re: the dentist... (my poor LO...am I the most horrible mommy ever?)

I've always brushed 1-2x/day and never really like candy. However I drink A LOT of coke I'm ashamed to admit...but I have over 20 fillings And one root canal
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Old 06-24-2008, 10:36 AM   #8
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Re: the dentist... (my poor LO...am I the most horrible mommy ever?)

Yeah I think maybe this has been so hard for me b/c I never had cavities as a kid so I just keep thinking cavities as a kid = bad mommy. I know in the long run it's not the end of the world b/c these are baby teeth anyway, it's just the short-term pain I don't want my daughter to go through.

I also wonder if maybe the family dentist's laid-back approach is more my style. I'm all for preventative measures when they're definitely necessary but struggle with doing things for the sake of doing them. I trust medical professionals to make professional decisions that take the child into account and HOPE that everything is being done with my daughter's best interest in mind.
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Old 06-24-2008, 10:40 AM   #9
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Re: the dentist... (my poor LO...am I the most horrible mommy ever?)

It's another of those wonderful genetic things!

I've never had a cavity in my life (and not because I'm particularly careful) and hubby is super careful and has lots of cavities!

(I'm hoping the kids get "my" teeth!)
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Old 06-24-2008, 10:44 PM   #10
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Re: the dentist... (my poor LO...am I the most horrible mommy ever?)

Quote:
Originally Posted by jmbisignano View Post
Yeah I think maybe this has been so hard for me b/c I never had cavities as a kid so I just keep thinking cavities as a kid = bad mommy. I know in the long run it's not the end of the world b/c these are baby teeth anyway, it's just the short-term pain I don't want my daughter to go through.

I also wonder if maybe the family dentist's laid-back approach is more my style. I'm all for preventative measures when they're definitely necessary but struggle with doing things for the sake of doing them. I trust medical professionals to make professional decisions that take the child into account and HOPE that everything is being done with my daughter's best interest in mind.
Cavities as kids doesn't = bad mommy. I had plenty as a kid. All my brothers did as well. My mom co-slept, breastfed, babywore, homeschooled ect. It was just our teeth. If it makes your feel better my adult teeth did much better.

My son (almost 6) has my teeth. He has 3 caps and a filling. Two fillings is nothing.


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