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Old 06-24-2008, 10:27 PM   #1
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i need advice, i'm really in need mamas!!

my DS is still co-sleeping & breastfed. he wants to nurse all night long. i'm pregnant and the nursing is killing me, the worst pain ever!!! he wants nothing to do with milk either. i'm at a loss as to what to do. i haven't slept in 3 nights b/c of his constant nursing and the pain. i would love to get him in his crib and night wean him but have no idea how. this is really affecting me and my family in a negative way!!!

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Old 06-24-2008, 10:28 PM   #2
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Re: i need advice, i'm really in need mamas!!

I am sorry mama, is he nursing to eat or just to comfort himself?
he may be clinging to you because he feels the presence of the baby on the way.
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Old 06-24-2008, 10:52 PM   #3
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Re: i need advice, i'm really in need mamas!!

mary.

i chose to night wean my first shortly after i got pregnant with my second. the pain was sooooo bad and he was certainly at an age that he no longer NEEDED to nurse at night.

if i remember correctly, it only took a few nights of my husband taking over as the primary comforter for his night wakings. it really couldn't have been that bad, b/c i don't even really remember it. to this day, my oldest son still prefers to cuddle with daddy at night. i don't let it hurt my feelings, they need that closeness at night that i get from (several) nursing sessions during the day.

we do co-sleep upon the first waking at night, so i know that i was still in the bed. i'm guessing that i just stayed sleeping while my husband cuddled or at least pretended to be sleeping? he didn't really even ask to nurse at night after we stopped, until JUST recently. it's killing me with night nursing my youngest, so something is going to have to happen again. ugh.

good luck mama.
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Old 06-25-2008, 07:53 AM   #4
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Re: i need advice, i'm really in need mamas!!

for you!! My ds was nursing all night long and at around 11 months, I chose to night-wean him. At the time he was sleeping with me, so we went to bed as usual and I fed him right away as usual. When he awoke for the 2nd time I again fed him. Then after that I refused the breast and just held him. He cried a lot and was very upset with me. The first night was the worst, but I stayed strong (DH was deployed so I had to do it on my own!). He finally settled down, but again got upset with me. This went on for a bit, but I just kept holding him tightly, telling him that I loved him. He finally fell asleep and actually slept for like 4 hours straight. I kept that routine up the next nights and finally he accepted it and began sleeping better!

Now, to get him to sleep in his own crib, that was a different matter. DH and I decided to help him learn that about a month ago when he was a year old. I was not for the cry it out method, but after trying several methods, including the popular "No cry sleep solution", I gave in and we "ferberized" him. The first evening was so hard!!! We went in every 5 and then 10 minutes to lay him back down and reassure him. It was hard on us and him. I almost backed out. He fell asleep after an hour, and now he goes to sleep on his own in his own crib!!! Before I had been rocking him for every nap, and I was feeling so worn out and resentful. I was not a happy mama. I must say that I am feeling so great these days--well rested even!! I know what we did was controversial on this forum, but I do not regret it. He was at an appropriate age, and perhaps our mothers and grandmothers are not always wrong. Just do what YOU need to do for you and your family. GOOD LUCK!
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Old 06-25-2008, 08:15 AM   #5
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Re: i need advice, i'm really in need mamas!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fither View Post
mary.

i chose to night wean my first shortly after i got pregnant with my second. the pain was sooooo bad and he was certainly at an age that he no longer NEEDED to nurse at night.

if i remember correctly, it only took a few nights of my husband taking over as the primary comforter for his night wakings. it really couldn't have been that bad, b/c i don't even really remember it. to this day, my oldest son still prefers to cuddle with daddy at night. i don't let it hurt my feelings, they need that closeness at night that i get from (several) nursing sessions during the day.


we do co-sleep upon the first waking at night, so i know that i was still in the bed. i'm guessing that i just stayed sleeping while my husband cuddled or at least pretended to be sleeping? he didn't really even ask to nurse at night after we stopped, until JUST recently. it's killing me with night nursing my youngest, so something is going to have to happen again. ugh.

good luck mama.
I don't have any advice for you mama because I haven't been through that. But what this wise mama said sounds great and its actually what my best friend did as well It was an easier transition that way and her DD didn't feel left out or anything. They did co sleep with her at the time and began transitioning her to her toddler bed. The DH would get up with Kate and do everything. Maybe give that a try!
Update us on how it goes!
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Old 06-25-2008, 12:40 PM   #6
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Re: i need advice, i'm really in need mamas!!

night weaning isn't always difficult. When I did it, the first night was bad, but the next night she slept through. Of course, I had to night wean a couple of times over the next 9 months after illnesses or travelling which necessitated night nursing, but it never took longer than 1-2 nights.

It will make a huge difference for you both.
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