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Old 07-11-2008, 12:15 PM   #1
princemelissas
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Are you a mom of 3+ kids?

I have always wanted a large family but #3 did me in. It was emotionally and physically very hard on me. It's been almost 6 mos now and I still haven't gotten into a routine. I just was wondering of women that have more than 3 children did you experience the same thing? And was #4, 5, 6, ect. any easier? Advice would be great too

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Old 07-11-2008, 12:19 PM   #2
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Re: Are you a mom of 3+ kids?

Yes, I experienced the same thing with #3. I physically should not have more, and I find I have to be very careful to provide each kiddo with individual attention. I don't know that a #4 child would be smart for my family. Certainly not doable from a health perspective.
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Old 07-11-2008, 12:21 PM   #3
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Re: Are you a mom of 3+ kids?

Same here-we always wanted 4-5 but now that number 3 is here I'm pooped My dh actually went ahead and made an appt. for a vasectomy and then we decided to cancel it and wait a couple of years-I think I still would like one more but definately need a break, my kids are fairly close in age (have 3 ages 3 and under right now) and its wearing me out! sara
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Old 07-11-2008, 12:21 PM   #4
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Re: Are you a mom of 3+ kids?

We have six and it's like that with everyone of them. Once we get into a routine, something comes along to mess it up. Now we're pretty much a day to day routine family. We're def done because my body cannot handle anymore. Seven pregnancies ((we had 2 mc)) in seven years is far too much for one body. I think that contributes to my inability to keep a routine with the kids.
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Old 07-11-2008, 12:36 PM   #5
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Re: Are you a mom of 3+ kids?

When my 3rd daughter was born... my kids ages were 3, 17 months, and newborn. So 3 up to age 3.
My husband at the time was away in the military, so I was on my own taking care of them.
It was rough. lol wow... routine? That did NOT exist. It's hard when they are so young to get them all on a routine together.

Now, fast forward 5 years... and add on another kid lol.. my kids are ages 8, 6, 5, and 2.. and I'm due to have a 5th kid in December. Life is SO easy with the kids now. They all have a routine, the house never feels "chaotic" as it did when they were younger. They keep each other busy.. sometimes when I'm trying to give them their daily dose of individual attention, they kind of blow me off LOL I'm not nearly as "cool" as they are lol. They love playing and hanging out with each other. They are very independent which makes my life so much easier.
I can honestly say I'm already thinking about a possibility of baby #6.. but no more after that!

I never thought I'd want a big family, until my family got bigger. I actually used to have not so nice opinions of big families. I couldn't understand how the kids could be happy, not having as much attention from their parents as a 1 or 2 kid family would get. Or monetarily how it could work. But like I said, as my family grew... I saw that they DO get enough attention.. maybe more than they want sometimes LOL. And we do provide for them, its not easy- we're not rich, but we manage.

But of course.. your health is #1. If your body doesn't feel able to have more kids- then obviously you want to do what is best for your body. So health is priority.
If it's just fear of having more kids and the household being too busy or too chaotic... it all gets SO much easier as they grow older. When they can brush their own teeth, dress themselves for bed, rinse off their own dinner dishes, do chores around the house- life is easy! Of course my 2 year old still doesn't do all that, but he does do a lot for a 2 year old lol. He loves helping out!

Just give it time... but obviously- if you feel your family is complete, and/or your body can't handle another pregnancy- then enjoy your family and don't worry about "what ifs" or feeling disappointed about not having a big family you anticipated on having. These days any family is big it seems lol.. more and more people are happy with dogs and opting not to have kids.
So just enjoy your kids and whatever will be will be!
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Old 07-11-2008, 12:40 PM   #6
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Re: Are you a mom of 3+ kids?

#2 and #3 were my hardest additions until I hit #7. And 7 is hard because he's a 6 year old with significant behavioral and medical issues (sitting her 40 minutes into his current temper tantrum no less).

Once the first ones got older, it was actually a LOT easier. It was very hard to meet the needs of 2 young toddlers with a newborn. Its not so hard to tell 12, 9 and 7 year olds what they need to be doing and supervise them.
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Old 07-11-2008, 12:43 PM   #7
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Re: Are you a mom of 3+ kids?

Does DH count as one??
I only have two and I feel like every single day! I'm not one of those "I love being a mom" kinda gals.. I'm more like "I love my kids but I'm barely surviving being a mom" (Gosh I hope I'm not the only one)
So no more for us!
Good luck with whatever decision you make!
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Old 07-11-2008, 12:59 PM   #8
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Re: Are you a mom of 3+ kids?

Quote:
Originally Posted by TaylorMomOf2 View Post
Does DH count as one??
I only have two and I feel like every single day! I'm not one of those "I love being a mom" kinda gals.. I'm more like "I love my kids but I'm barely surviving being a mom" (Gosh I hope I'm not the only one)
So no more for us!
Good luck with whatever decision you make!
Oh Mama, I am the same way. I just survive 1 cup of joe at a time. That's how I define my day... morning coffee - check, nap time cofee - check
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Old 07-11-2008, 01:33 PM   #9
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Re: Are you a mom of 3+ kids?

Well, I'm expecting my 8th. Getting a routine going with the 3rd was a challenge but once we got it going 4 and 5 were a breeze. 6 and 7 were twins and that's a whole other challenge that had to be faced. I look forward to another singleton this time. There really isn't much difference in having 3 and having 7 except that I have twins and everything about that is different. My first was 3 when I had my second. Then I had a 4 yr old, 16 mos old, and newborn then my next one came 11 mos later so I had 5, 2, 1, and newborn. That was really the easiest as far as routine because I had 3 in diapers. I think it depends on the person. I know large families aren't for everyone but I couldn't imagine it any other way.
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Old 07-11-2008, 01:41 PM   #10
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Re: Are you a mom of 3+ kids?

I always thought I wanted 3 then I got #2 and yikes! DD#2 was a challenge until just about 3 month ago. Now things are a lot easier and more sane. I wanted 3 but I'm worried that would just put me over the edge! I know you deal with what you have and I would love it if it happened, but I'm just not sure I can go into #3 knowing how I was with 2. It makes me sad, but I love the blessings that I already have and I want to be the best mom I can be to them, so we are probably done.
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