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Old 10-09-2006, 09:47 AM   #21
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Re: Man, why does she have to cry ALL the darn time?

this is going to sound extreme but cut out EVERYTHING from your diet but potatos and rice for a week. Then add things in SLOWLY. It really could be something in your diet that you just dont releize. There is a mom at my Local LLL that had to do this and she can not eat anything processed b/c it all has some form of milk or soy in it. Also it could be colic too which really there is nothing you can do about it. Lily was like this and I laugh b/c now I releize how I got back to my prepregos weight so fast. I was ALWAYS bouncing her on that darn yoga ball. She would always be swaddled. Also the only way I could get her to sleep was swaddled in her chair that vibrated in the bathroom w/ the fan on.

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Old 10-09-2006, 10:44 AM   #22
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Re: Man, why does she have to cry ALL the darn time?

I'm so sorry mama. I know it's hard with a fussy baby. My DD cried nonstop for the first 6-7 months of her life. It was so hard to do anything. I was a prisoner in my own home! When my DD was able to get a bit more mobile she stopped crying so much. Now she's 13 months and still fussy, but if she has me, she's fine. She won't go to anyone else and if she wants me and I'm not available all heck breaks loose... However, she is a very easy baby now. So well behaved and just a pleasure to be around. It will get better, your little one won't be screaming like this in 15 years. OK, maybe she'll be screaming at you, but for a different reason Hang in there.
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Old 10-09-2006, 11:28 AM   #23
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Re: Man, why does she have to cry ALL the darn time?

I too am saying Diet. miranda was my little soy baby. for the first 3 weeks of her life all she did was cry and scream, scream and cry.. wasn't happy anywhere including with me and didn't sleep longer than 20 minutes at any time. I spent my time crying and wondering where the nearest gun was to blow my brains out. Seriously.

But at 3 weeks of age we went to the doctor and they put her on soy formula. and after that it was like a lightswitch went on... she started sleeping through the night.. not just 2 or 3 hours.. but all night long!

and she's still a very good sleeper now! when she turned a year old I was worried about putting her on cow's milk, but i tried it. all she did was poo and got a horrible rash. It didn't seem to affect her more than that.. but I put her on soy milk after testing the waters with cow's and she was much better.

a couple months before she was 2 I switched her over to cows.. and now she does fine with it.. It was Expendsive that soymilk. lol

I hope you find something that works.. I would Try the cutting out everything to see if it gets any better.
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Old 10-09-2006, 11:36 AM   #24
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Re: Man, why does she have to cry ALL the darn time?

I'm so sorry! I didn't have a fussy baby, but I know fussy babies. Their moms feel like they can't ever leave them with someone else for even an hour, because they know that person will NEVER do it again.

BUT, if you know someone you trust, I really suggest leaving her with them. But, only someone that you KNOW will be patient and loving with her. Then just go to a bookstore for an hour or so. (Research this problem). Just relax, then you can regroup and you will be amazed how much better you feel.

I wish you lived closer to me, I would watch her for a few hours. Screaming babies don't bother me a bit. I am used to it.

I don't have any advice as to why she might be so intolerant, but my guess would be a food thing. How is her skin? Does she seem to have dry patches, like excema? Do you or your husband have food allergies?

If it isn't a food thing, it could just be HER. She might be one of those "I liked it better in your womb" kind of kids. You could try those bears with the womb sounds and see if that is soothing. If this is an "I hate life outside the womb" thing, you just have to wait til she outgrows it.

Most important... NEVER EVER just take the pediatrition at his word. He sees your child for 20 minutes, you KNOW her. So, if your gut tells you there is something wrong, listen to your instincts and research on your own. But, try to learn what you can. I KNOW how hard this is to even read a magazine, much less research something.

One thing my colicky babies seem to like is I sit in a chair and lay them on their tummies across my knees, and I bounce them softly or pat their backs. For some reason, it seems to ease their tummy pain.
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Old 10-09-2006, 12:33 PM   #25
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Re: Man, why does she have to cry ALL the darn time?

Mama. I have a fussy baby, too. My first one was pretty fussy as well. Neither is very cuddly...both were very alert at an early age and always had to "see" stuff. W/ younger DS, I noticed it got a little better around 5 1/2 to 6 months of age (he's 8 mo. now) when he figured out that when he was on his tummy, he could roll around and explore stuff. He hated tummy time before that...wouldn't give it long enough to really try rolling any before he started screaming.

So I held him. I know that's not what you want to hear, but that's what I did. If I wasn't holding him, somebody else would (though we are fortunate enough to have family nearby, I wish you did b/c it helps for someone else to just be able to hold the baby for a while...DH would but he fussed a lot for DH, too and he just wasn't real patient with it). And I use a pacifier, which I know lots of people are down on, but it helps. It's soothing...babies have an inborn need to suckle and he's the type to push away from the breast when he's done eating (unless he falls asleep in which case he'll stay latched on until I unlatch him or he jostles himself loose). But he'll frequently grab for the pacifier when he's done nursing and pop it right in. Don't know if you've tried this or not, but it's worth a shot if you haven't.

I second the thoughts on wraps...they're wonderful and leave both your arms free, unlike a sling (one of my arms always felt trapped in that thing). It makes it easier to eat, easier to shop. And she's not a "bad baby" and shame on anyone who says that to you. I think "is he/she a good baby?" is the STUPIDEST question. She's not out to get you or your DH (and I know you know that), she's not manipulating you. She's just trying to fit into the world. It does get better. Really, it does. There were days I wanted to tear my hair out, days I cried from the stress...have you looked into any mommy's day out programs, or MOPS (mothers of preschoolers) or anything like that? Some way you could get a small break? It's only human to need some breathing time. And it's nothing you've done! You're not a bad mama, you haven't ruined her! Babies are just different. Some are high strung, some are laid back. Some are colicky, some aren't.

I won't say that either of my DS's have the sunniest of dispositions, at least not ALL the time. Oldest DS is still pretty high strung, but he's extremely intelligent, loving, inquisitive, and generally a happy child (as long as things are going his way). Youngest DS seems to be following in his footsteps.

Hang in there.
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Old 10-09-2006, 08:53 PM   #26
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Re: Man, why does she have to cry ALL the darn time?

Oh, mama, hugs. Been there. My first cried incessantly, for months.

Two things jump out at me in your post. The first is the diet issue. To really truly know whether your baby has a food sensitivity, you have to keep a food diary while you do the elimination diet. Just start by jotting down what you eat and what time you eat it, and then also jotting down her feeding times and when/if the crying starts (and stops) after that. Also her poopies (and whether they are explosive and green as well, which may also be an indication of a food sensitivity).

WRT the soy issue -- at least 30% of children who have dairy proteint intolerances also have soy protein intolerances. While you are doing an elimination diet, you may want to consider going to rice milk products for yourself to avoid this potential pitfall.

In terms of looking for dairy in things, you also need to look for dairy byproducts like sodium caseinate, casein, and whey. There is a really easy way to do this -- look for a kosher symbol. If you see a U with an O around it, or a K with an O around it, or a backwards C looking thing -- and it also says "pareve" or has NO D next to it, then it will not have ANY dairy byproducts in it. If you happen to live in an area with an Orthodox Jewish population, their grocery store will have many items that can easily be substituted for dairy and you can also be sure that things like kosher deli meat etc. has no dairy byproducts (some nonkosher deli meats do). Please PM me if you need more info on determining what all has dairy and soy in it.

Corn and wheat can also be potential food sensitivities -- that includes food items with corn syrup. Just something to be aware of when you're doing a food diary/elimination diet.

The other thing that screamed out at me is a reflux issue. You may want to consider getting your babe screened for this (your pedi may or may not understand all the issues with reflux -- some just are not that well versed in it even though they say they are) by a pedi gastro specialist. There are nursing tricks as well as, if it comes necessary, medications that can help a reflux baby be far more comfortable. The carseat can be agony for these babies because of the way it compresses their bodies when they sit in it; it really aggravates the reflux. Wearing a reflux baby in the Tummy to Tummy position can be a lifesaver, as can a good "over the arm" hold.

Although I wholeheartedly agree that "this too shall pass" I think you will feel more at ease if you really investigage whether she might be in a lot of pain from a food protein intolerance and/or reflux. If she does have an intolerance, it will aggravate the reflux and create a vicious circle. The exposure to dairy and soy formula in her gut will also exacerbate it, so if you do supplement you might want to consider going to the hypoallergenic stuff while you do the elimination diet - otherwise your eliminations will be for naught. This is NOT about lactose intolerance, it is about a protein intolerance. If her gut has a chance to heal from it, she may outgrow it. 90% of kids do outgrow it by age 3 if their exposure is minimized/eliminated in their early months.

My daughter was finally diagnosed with reflux and a dairy/soy/corn intolerance at 10 weeks. I eliminated those from my diet (by age 1 I could reintroduce corn and soy but was off dairy til she weaned at 2.5 yrs) and she was also put on medication (Zantac). In one week she was a different baby. She still was "high needs" in the sense of being easily overstimulated and always wanting lots of affection and wearing, nursing, etc. (still loves affection at age 6) but her distress was more or less gone.

Good luck mama. PM me if you need more info and do try to find a La Leche League in your area for some support.
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Old 10-09-2006, 09:41 PM   #27
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Re: Man, why does she have to cry ALL the darn time?

Gosh, ya'll have such great suggestions!

Tomorrow I start the elimination diet. I know it's going to be a challenge (especially since my husband eats everything under the sun!), but it will be worth while. Just to know for sure whether she does or does not have food sensitivities.
I have food allergies, myself. I have a lactose intolerance issue, and am also allergic to most types of peppers. I dont know if food allergies can be passed down from mother to child?

I also agree that I DO need time away. My husband and I sat down and he agreed to watch her for 1 hour, 3 times a week...even if she cries and is fussy. I decided to join my local CURVED gym...to get back into shape after having Emma and also to have time to chat with other women and just get a little break. I'm hoping it will give me the little breath of air I need.

I am also going to further investigate the reflux issue IF the elimination diet doesn't bring on any changes in her sleep or behavior.
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Old 10-10-2006, 06:36 AM   #28
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Re: Man, why does she have to cry ALL the darn time?

it will be a long road but it will be worth it! I wanted to add to remember that milk proteins can stay in your milk for up to 6 weeks. I hope everything gets better. I totaly know how you feel. Im glad your hubby has decided to watch her mine never would but I did have family. PM me if you need to talke b/c my daughter used to be just like yours
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Old 10-10-2006, 08:55 AM   #29
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Re: Man, why does she have to cry ALL the darn time?

i don't know how extreme you are about the dairy, but i found that just milk and cheese didn't cut it. i had to cut out every morsel of milk protein. and THAT made a HUGE difference after 4 months of crying, crying, crying. hugs to you! you're doing a great job!
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Old 10-10-2006, 11:54 AM   #30
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Re: Man, why does she have to cry ALL the darn time?

Just an extra thought.

I have one day care girl who as an infant was absolutley the most high maintanance kid I have ever seen. She could cry her day away.

By four months, I noticed that she liked TV, especially Tele Tubbies, and Baby Motzart. BUT, she also would calm down if I dressed her in NOTHING but a diaper and the softest blanket in the world. She liked a heavy blanket with some weight to it. (I laid her in the stroller to watch tv)

As she got older, her preferences for how things that DARE to touch her body became more obvious. And sounds. She HATES sound. So, in a quiet room, with nothing but a diaper and the television (She liked country music videos too) she could "Chill out".

She obviously has sensory issues, and once we understood that (FIVE years later) we are more able to deal with her problems. She is easily overstimulated, she doesn't do well in a crowded room. Disneyland to her is Disney Hell. But, in her "perfect enviroment" she is the most wonderful kid.

She MUST wear very soft clothes, that don't have elastic in the wrists, neck or ankles. He socks are a nightmare, she sleeps in no Jammies, but she is much better (mostly) It just took understanding her problems, then respecting her need to wear only a few certain things. She lives in one Hannah Anderson dress. The same dress over and over.

Have you tried letting her sleep in a super soft t-shirt and a sleep sack instead of PJs?

Have you tried letting her sit in a stroller in a dark quiet room and let her watch an interesting baby movie? She may be far too young to enjoy the Baby videos, but it is worth a try.
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