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Old 10-12-2006, 09:51 PM   #101
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Re: Why don't people breastfeed?

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Originally Posted by kimb96 View Post
I really don't like these threads. There is always judgment towards people who choose to ff. I don't think any mother needs to justify her feeding choices. It really doesn't matter why a mother chooses to bf or ff, nor is it anyone's business.
Agreed, everyone knows these types of threads just instigate fights, whether intended to or not, that's what happens.

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Old 10-12-2006, 11:43 PM   #102
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Re: Why don't people breastfeed?

Women have a right to choose not to. Women have a right to make a commitment or not. Some women have really serious problems.

Personally, I have nursed all three of my birth children. None of them has ever had any formula even though I work full time out of the house. And it's a good thing since all are very allergic to various foods including dairy.

Has it been easy? Not, with two+ years of pumping, about 20 bouts of mastitis, bites, sleepless nights.

Has it been worth it? Absolutely!! It has been a blessing for my kids and seeing them grow and thrive on my milk is nothing short of miraculous.
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Old 10-14-2006, 06:56 PM   #103
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Re: Why don't people breastfeed?

I'm going to answer the question that was asked. I choose not to breastfeed because I don't feel comfortable doing it. I tries with my 1st and 2nd for 6-8 weeks and it went ok but I did not feel close to the baby while I was doing it and it was awkward. My husband did not care either way. We were both ff and most people we know ff their babies. My best friend ebf all 4 of her kids and she has talked to me about it. She knew thta I had did it for a little while with my first 2 and when she came over to visit after the 3rd she asked if he was doing well on formula. I told her that I just decided not to for the last and she said "As long as you and the baby are happy then you made the right decision" I am close to my children and love them with all my heart. They are all happy healthy children and I have no guilt at all. Most moms that I know that do bf do not feel the need to justify their decision because they are doing what they feel is best. I don't justify what I do because I know what I am doing is best for me and my family. I feel close to my baby when I feed him and feeding time is great for both of us. One of my SILS ebf and we neer really have talked about it at length. She knows I ff and really dosen't care how I feed my baby because she knows it is my business. I have read all about the benifits of bf and CHOOSE not to. I think people who attack others on their decisions have some issues with their own decisions. Maybe not the bf one but something else. If you feel good about what you are doing the need to bash is not there. Have a great night and god bless you and your little ones

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Old 10-14-2006, 08:11 PM   #104
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Re: Why don't people breastfeed?

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I didn't read the article in fit pregnancy, but I am in a similar situation. This may be TMI for some, but I actually would get physically sick to my stomach if my dh messed with my breasts too much during sex, due to this past sexual abuse.

I was absolutely dead set on bfing ds, but was secretly afraid that I'd have the same sick to my stomach feeling every time he nursed, and wasn't sure I'd be able to handle it. And I hated the thought of this man who abused me taking something so wonderful away from my son (it was bad enough what he took from me). I *never* told anyone - I honestly thought I was weird. So it's a bit of a relief to hear that it can be a problem for other women.

*But* I feel very fortunate. I never once had the same sick feeling when b****** ds. Maybe because I wanted to nurse ds SO badly, so my subconsious knew I had to overcome the issues. Maybe it was because I was in control. Maybe because he was a baby, maybe because he was *my* baby. I don't know - probably a little of all of it.

And now, I've actually started to let dh "go there" during sex again (I just kept my nursing bras on for a while, and dh never said anything - lol) I have been pleasantly surprised that the sick to my stomach feeling has gone away. I feel like I've reclaimed something that I thought I'd never get back...
That's really beautiful. What a cool thing that your breastfeeding relationship with your son healed a part of your soul that had been injured.
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Old 10-14-2006, 08:19 PM   #105
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Re: Why don't people breastfeed?

Also, I wanted to say that I BF, and a couple of months ago, and I went back to work very part time (2 hours in the afternoon, 2 days a week), during which time my mom and aunt take care of DS. My work hours span the time that DS usually goes down for a nap, so I have to pump a bottleful (8 oz.) for each of those days.

Wow, pumping just for those two afternoons is hard work! I cannot even imagine having to pump for DS if I worked full time, as a lot of mommies do. I totally admire those who work full time and pump, and I totally understand those who work full time and just can't keep up.

Anyway, love to all mommies...BFers or FFers...
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Old 10-15-2006, 05:26 PM   #106
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Re: Why don't people breastfeed?

My first DS just basically refused to nurse! But if you gave him a bottle he would suck on that!
My second DS really enjoyed nursing...BUT I could not make enough milk for him!! I took Fenugreek like food...drank tons of water.....pumped...too no avail! Plus my oldest was only just 14 months...so sitting down nursing for 20-40 min just didn't work! I ended up nursing him for 2 months!
I don't feel guilty for giving them formula. It was what was best for them and me!
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Old 10-15-2006, 06:03 PM   #107
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Re: Why don't people breastfeed?

I wanted to breastfeed. I took the classes, read the books, thought it was going to be fabulous. Then, she was born and wouldn't latch. Then, PPD hit. Well they both happend at the same time. I had zero help at home, no LLL, no LC, and my mom was 1 hr away from me. I just couldn't do it. My emotional status was non-existant to the point where I wanted to drive off a cliff and I physically couldn't get her to latch.

I've since learned a bit more about 3rd trimester depression and plan on getting on meds. That should help with the PPD. Then, I will DEMAND help in the hospital for latching, ask for a pump should problems start happening (to stimulate the milk production anyway), and be more persistant. I'm actually thinking of hiring a post partum doula to help me when I get back home (we live in the boonies and far from civilization.

It took me almost a year to stop feeling such guilt over being a bf'ing flunky. It took me that long to not let people's statements bother me. Now, I know what we did was best for me and my daughter. I learned from the situation and am going to be better for it.
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