View Poll Results: Do you really say mean things or expect and explanation from FFing mamas?
Yes 3 1.30%
No 204 88.70%
Sometimes 23 10.00%
Voters: 230. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 08-13-2008, 11:54 AM   #21
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Re: Do you really say mean things or expect an explanation?

I haven't experienced it on this site, but on other forums, yes, I have had to deal with it. I belong to a forum where the mothers are all about AP, BLW, and BF, so when they find out I FF and BF for only a short period, a few of the hardcore BFers immediately ask me why I didn't BF for longer. For a long time, I was insecure about it and felt like I failed as a mother. It was heartbreaking for me to deal with and I felt like I didn't love my child as much as they did. Logically, I knew that being a good mother isn't just about BFing. I support BFing fully, but knowing how difficult it can be, I do not blame FF mommas at all and do not ask for any explanation at all. It's a matter of respect.

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Old 08-13-2008, 11:56 AM   #22
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Re: Do you really say mean things or expect an explanation?

Nope, I don't do it and I haven't seen it. I could care less what another mother does with her baby as long as it is nurtured and loved!
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Old 08-13-2008, 12:04 PM   #23
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Re: Do you really say mean things or expect an explanation?

Mean people suck. IMO, one is pretty insecure to say unprovoked mean things to anyone about any topic. I don't understand why you would even care if another mom FF's her child. I breastfed for 14.5 months before I had to stop to have a medical procedure not compatible with bf'ing. Never once did I feel the need to preach to anyone, give looks to anyone, or question anyone's choice to formula feed or breast feed for that matter. Seriously, who cares?
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Old 08-13-2008, 12:04 PM   #24
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Re: Do you really say mean things or expect an explanation?

Haven't read the whole thread...

Bottom line: FEED YOUR BABY. I don't care how you do it, just feed him/her. It makes them stop crying from hunger, ya know?

I have seen SOME of the nastiness you mention, but it's usually just trolls or people looking to stir the pot. :stir:

For me personally, I'm very much pro-BFing because I think it's best for my family, but the bottom line is it is just the way I choose to feed my baby. I respect and admire mamas who choose to or are forced to FF. To me, I am not higher than them for going my route nor do I feel inferior to them for going theirs.

Again... JUST FEED THE KID!!!!!!

As for asking, I may ask out of curiosity if it seems the mama wants to vent about the why, but honestly, beyond that, it's her business not mine.
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Old 08-13-2008, 12:06 PM   #25
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Re: Do you really say mean things or expect an explanation?

Quote:
Originally Posted by togg_mama View Post
Haven't read the whole thread...

Bottom line: FEED YOUR BABY. I don't care how you do it, just feed him/her. It makes them stop crying from hunger, ya know?

I have seen SOME of the nastiness you mention, but it's usually just trolls or people looking to stir the pot. :stir:

For me personally, I'm very much pro-BFing because I think it's best for my family, but the bottom line is it is just the way I choose to feed my baby. I respect and admire mamas who choose to or are forced to FF. To me, I am not higher than them for going my route nor do I feel inferior to them for going theirs.

Again... JUST FEED THE KID!!!!!!

As for asking, I may ask out of curiosity if it seems the mama wants to vent about the why, but honestly, beyond that, it's her business not mine.
I just had to say I am about the smiley stirring the pot. I didnt even know we had one! That is too funny!
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Old 08-13-2008, 12:08 PM   #26
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Re: Do you really say mean things or expect an explanation?

I don't do it on here, but outside of cyber world I've come to be known as the tree-hugging boob nazi. Yeah - I openly give family and friends down the road, to their face, for formula feeding - unless they have good reason. I mean, FF'ing because they can get it for free w/ WIC is NOT a good reason, nor is the fact that they wanna go out and party/drink. I don't even think FF'ing so you can be away from your baby more is a good reason - that's why I have a pump! Sorry - I've been getting really worked up about this subject lately due to the WIC issue, come to find out a soon to be mum I know is quitting her job after she has her baby so she can get WIC to pay for formula, that way she can go out and party/drink too. That upsets me VERY much - I'd call that child abuse/neglect.........
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Old 08-13-2008, 12:10 PM   #27
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Re: Do you really say mean things or expect an explanation?

I am a FF'ing mom and have seen a few snide comments, nothing major. There is definitley a stigma on here about it and WIC. There was one mama who got very nasty about it, but on the whole everyone here is respectable about it. I don't feel I owe anyone any explanations. My child is very healthy and very happy, that is all that matters to me.
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Old 08-13-2008, 12:12 PM   #28
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Re: Do you really say mean things or expect an explanation?

Absolutely not. As long as the child is being fed appropriately it is none of my business.
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Old 08-13-2008, 12:14 PM   #29
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Re: Do you really say mean things or expect an explanation?

I don't think if it is the pro BF comments that bother me, but the lack of UNDERSTANDING/COMPASSION of what some of us FF Moms went through to try and BF. BF was EXTREMELY important to me, and I'm well aware of all of the benefits and rewards, that is why I supplemented at the breast, went without bottles and tried everything under the sun for almost five months. I think what bothers me the most is when a BF Mama assumes that I chose formula because it was 'easy', or didn't give my all at BFing, both of which couldn't be further from the truth. I think in general it is just a lack of understanding, or willingness to understand the other side.
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Old 08-13-2008, 12:20 PM   #30
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Re: Do you really say mean things or expect an explanation?

No. I would never say something judgemental about the way a person feeds their babies. Yes, I have my own opinions about it, but they are mine, and I don't use them as ammunition to make another person feel bad.

In fact, I was once put on the defensive when I asked someone why she was wanting to wean her 7mo. I really wasn't asking for any reason other than I wanted to know. I got accused by several people of forcing her to justify her reasons.
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