How long is it supposed to take??!!
I've been watching my neice (13mo) for 8 weeks now and she still has not adjusted to being in my home. I know that she went through a lot of change moving here and not being by herself cooped up all day with a spanish speaking nanny, so to be with me, out-and-about, sharing my attention with 2 other kids, and I don't speak spanish, she is just NOT adjusting. On the surface things are fine, she is sweet girl. I know a lot of the things she does are normal age-realated things, but it's really throwing my younger DD for a loop. Here's some of the things that have happened. Banging on the bedroom door while my girls are asleep in the am when she gets here, when I put the gate up, throwing toys down the hall at their door. When I put her down for a nap after my LO is asleep calling "bebe" to her over and over until she wakes up. Slapping my LO in the face and then laughing when she starts crying. Refusing to eat or drink. Doesn't try to communicate ANY of her needs. If I didn't put her at the table with food she wouldn't eat the whole time with me, and sometimes she refuses to eat that. Eats very very slowly when she does eat. Often won't chew her food if she sees someone watching her. One day she refused to swallow her food and chewed it in her mouth for 20 min before I fished it out. Her eyes go vacant when I ask her or give her any direct attention, good or bad. The thing is when mom picks her up she says she is starved and eats like mad at home. I've seen her ask for food for mom and even throw tantrums for her but with me I get nothing but the blank stare and silent treatment. I'm really at a loss and I'd like to make it work but when I think back on each day it feels like she just tries to engage me in one constant power struggle. I've pointed it out to SIL and she just laughs it off. Oh, well if she falls asleep in the car for 5 min thats her nap for the day , giggle, giggle, when it's not funny! ARHG!!
mommy to Kadence 8/14/04 and Kamryn 12/9/07