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Old 08-23-2008, 05:14 PM   #1
danaalex
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i don't know what to do :(

we were going to homeschool our older two girls this year ( kindy and 1st grade). in early aug. both girls expressed a very strong desire to attend public school. i told them ok, but i had pretty much decided that we'd see how the school handled my requests first, i wanted my 1st grader in a class with a friend of her, and NOT in a class with the girl down the street that made her come home from kindy last year CRYING! and i wanted my kindergarten ( starting this year) to NOT have the same teacher her sister had last year. she wasn't very nice and was a poor teacher IMO. i did not want to deal with her again this year.

so, i emailed the principal, and spoke to him IN person and even wrote a note, which he asked me to do.

WELL, we get our kindy assignment and it's with the BAD teacher from last year. and then today i find out that the ONE kid in the entire first grade that i DID NOT want in my daughter's class is IN HER CLASS!!!!!!!! but, her friend is ALSO in the class.

so, if i pull her from the class then she's not in class with her friend (which they both really wanted). but this not nice little girl that i didn't not want my daughter in class with, is also on our school bus AND she lives 3 doors down from us the little girl is MEAN to my daughter and i hate the fact that she is the in the circle of neighborhood friends, but since it's like 2 hrs of play and there are other kids there we deal with it.

but this year, it will be bus to school and then 6.5 hrs in school with her and then bus ride home and then play after school. i had pretty much decided that if the school wasn't going to respect my request that i'd pull the girls from school and we'd just homeschool them. and that is SO much easier said than done. i know if i don't let them go to school it will crush them. but i also know i won't be able to handle my daughter being hurt, or the kindergarten teacher ignoring my questions again. and on top of all of that, the school librarian told my daughter that she was LYING, three times last year. she would get in the car and just start sobbing

i am so angry and upset right now that the school simply does not care what might be in the best interest of it's students and basically said to me screw you. there are 6 kindy classes and 6 1st grades. there was no reason my kids had to end up where they are, other than the staff deciding since i was trying to be proactive they were going to basically say, "screw you."

i am so crushed right now, and i really do not know what to do

any advice????????? i want school to be a positive experience for them, at least in kindergarten and first grade. and i don't think that coming home crying is a positive experience

thanks!!!!

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Old 08-23-2008, 05:22 PM   #2
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Re: i don't know what to do :(

Honestly, I'd just leave everything alone. They're going to have to learn to deal with people they may not like at some point. They'll have people in classes, work, etc that they dont' like in the future, including teachers and bosses. They have to learn to deal with these people. The earlier the better. I'd advise you to be as positive as possible, as you don't want your lo to go to school with a negative impression of her teacher. I know it's hard to see them deal with people like that, but stay strong
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Old 08-23-2008, 05:25 PM   #3
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Re: i don't know what to do :(

Is the girl still mean? maybe she will be different this year?
As for the teacher i would request a class change immediately and express your displeasure in your requests not being met.
I am going through school issues to.
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Old 08-23-2008, 05:28 PM   #4
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Re: i don't know what to do :(

There is a reason children have parents.
They do not know what is best for them.

simply because they WANT to go to school doesn't mean it is good for them.
you sound like a great momma who knows what is best for her kids.

If they WANTED to eat ice cream every day for every meal, would you let them? I assume not.

School can be an awful, toxic, disempowering environment, and if you believe homeschooling is best for your children at this time, then do it.
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Old 08-23-2008, 05:34 PM   #5
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Re: i don't know what to do :(

Quote:
Originally Posted by mommy2kaitlyn View Post
Is the girl still mean? maybe she will be different this year?
As for the teacher i would request a class change immediately and express your displeasure in your requests not being met.
I am going through school issues to.
I respectfully disagree. Have you ever worked in a school? If not, have you ever MADE a schedule for employees, etc??? If you had you'd realize it's IMPOSSIBLE to make EVERYONE happy. If EVERYONE requested the other teacher, not EVERYONE can get him/her, kwim?
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Old 08-23-2008, 05:35 PM   #6
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Re: i don't know what to do :(

I would go over the principal's head, and contact your local school district and tell them you had an issue with the teacher last year and you do NOT want that with your younger LO!! Otherwise, homeschool away and know your LO may be upset for a day or two, but they will get over it (and take them to pick out MUCH cooler school supplies than the public school wants)!
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Old 08-23-2008, 05:39 PM   #7
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Re: i don't know what to do :(

I agree with Deanna.
If your kids really *want to go to school, then give it a try...things may turn out fine. If not, you can always homeschool next semester.
I wouldn't homeschool without really being convicted that it was the thing to do. In other words, don't make the choice out of fear.
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Old 08-23-2008, 05:44 PM   #8
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Re: i don't know what to do :(

I am in agreement with Deanna (although we sure seem to be in the minority here). I do work in a school and I know that there are an abundance of factors that go into how students are assigned to classes. Some school districts go out of their way to accommodate parent requests but those districts (in my experience) are tiny and can more easily juggle.

I can also honestly say that though there are some teachers I think are better than others, there are precious few (I can only think of 2 out of about 40) that I would consider requesting a class move to have my son avoid them. (Sorry for poor wording.)

NO matter what class a child gets placed in, there will be kids he/she does not get along with. It is a part of life. And frankly, I don't think any school will respond in the way you want if they perceive they are being told "Do this or I pull my child out of school.".

Just my
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Old 08-23-2008, 05:52 PM   #9
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Re: i don't know what to do :(

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Old 08-23-2008, 06:58 PM   #10
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Re: i don't know what to do :(

When do students find out their teacher assignments? In my school, they find out in June. So, if both of those girls were in the same class, it would be hard to move one of them w/o the parents questioning it.

I would push more for moving your kindergarten student if you really feel strongly against this teacher.

Every school is different, and I don't know the atmosphere of yours. In my school, it's impossible to accommodate every parent request becaue then some classes would have 40 kids and others would have 5. I know that even when we've had to move kids around due to new sections, kids moving in/out, one child switching can make a big difference in the gender, racial, ability balance of the class. It's never really one child, since moving one student out means you have to balance it by moving one in.

Again, I'm not sure if your school is intentionally doing this, or if they fit your daughters into already completed rosters. I know in my school, we'd never intentionally try to screw a parent, it's just impossible to make everyone happy.
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