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Old 09-05-2008, 07:03 AM   #1
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4 or More Family Chat

Mothers (and fathers!) of four or more children, how are you doing today? What's your biggest struggle as of late? Share your struggles and maybe we can all diagnose and help each other

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Old 09-05-2008, 08:20 AM   #2
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Re: 4 or More Family Chat

no one?? the biggest struggle for me is getting up *if* I even hear my alarm going off....
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Old 09-05-2008, 08:29 AM   #3
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Re: 4 or More Family Chat

My biggest struggle..motivation in general on most days.

I have the perfect idea of how to rearrange my bedroom...no motivation to do it.

I have laundry to do..no motivation to do it.

I need to clean out the fridge..it doesn't stink yet, so no motivation to do it.

Doesn't help that the babies are now suffering from the snotties like I had a few days ago and the nights have been rough..so my natural inability to sleep for more than a few hours, coupled with the fact that the babies aren't sleeping...well leads to lack of motiviation during the day
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Old 09-05-2008, 08:37 AM   #4
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Re: 4 or More Family Chat

Quote:
Originally Posted by nannersmama View Post
My biggest struggle..motivation in general on most days.

I have the perfect idea of how to rearrange my bedroom...no motivation to do it.

I have laundry to do..no motivation to do it.

I need to clean out the fridge..it doesn't stink yet, so no motivation to do it.

Doesn't help that the babies are now suffering from the snotties like I had a few days ago and the nights have been rough..so my natural inability to sleep for more than a few hours, coupled with the fact that the babies aren't sleeping...well leads to lack of motiviation during the day
are you home schooling as well in addition to having all those kiddos?
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Old 09-05-2008, 08:39 AM   #5
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Re: 4 or More Family Chat

I can't help with motivation....maybe caffeine? Seriously,try to do things in small pieces...so as not to be overwhelming. Or reward yourself for a job.....like indulge in a bath, a new magazine, movie night, etc...

My daily struggle is with keeping the house clean. With so many us coming and going (I have teens, a preteen and a lo), stuff gets left around all the time. So, either I spend my time tidying up after them (dh included, lol) or I spend my time reminding them to put their things away. Oh, and our kitchen is always "open" due to various sports/club/work schedules.....I can never keep it clean for more than an hour (except at night, haha). I love my family, but I wish I was more organized. I find it hard to go to other ppl's homes that only have 1 or 2 kids and everything always seems to be in perfect order (even at unexpected pop-ins!).

Thanks for starting this thread.
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Old 09-05-2008, 08:45 AM   #6
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I have had serious struggles with "motivation" since... forever! The process of motivations started with realizing I actually have clinical depression. I got on an anti depressant so that helped at first with the emotions. Then I realized I have ADD (yea, don't know why that one took so long to figure out ) and I can't go on medication, but I can drink coffee so I don't skip my coffee, EVER. Also I made a plan. If I personally don't have a plan in place (whether it's a short list on a sticky note or a well laid out extensive plan) I get nothing done and I feel so LOST!

And the final piece to the puzzle for me was the motivation that fuels my motivation if that makes any sense. I gotta get back to schoolin' the kiddos, but I will come back and expound upon that last part.
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Old 09-05-2008, 09:31 AM   #7
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Ok I'm back!

I've found that reminding myself daily of why I do what I do and what I'm working towards helps a lot. Some of the reasons why I do what I do can be found here on my blog. I wrote it when someone gave us a very negative response when we announced we were expecting baby #5.

If you really want the run down of all my personal reasons I can give them but it would take me a while to type it all up so I don't want to do it unless you actually wan to hear it. Also I need to schedule the time I'll need to do it.
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Old 09-05-2008, 09:35 AM   #8
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I don't have 4 kids yet, but will. my biggest struggle tho is getting my kids to get along. Especially the oldest (10). He is constantly yellling, belittling, talking down, or chastising the 2nd oldest (7) and refuses to respect the youngest's (2) space or desires. He thinks Ramses a doll, to be played with whenever he wants and gets very upset when Ramses doesn't want to play with him or hold him or give him hugs or whatever. He just doesn't understand yet that Ramses is his own person. With the new baby coming, I'll be a SAHM and dont' know how I'll referee that all the time.

I have to have a list too, (although my schedule's no where near as organized or pretty as MommyScott's) otherwise, I just lay around and do nothing, then feel bad. I find that if I get up early, immediately get dressed and attack my list wihtout sitting down first, while I have energy, I get a bunch more done. then if I"m laying around in the afternoon, I can remember what I did already and that helps me feel more motivated.
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Old 09-05-2008, 09:42 AM   #9
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Honestly you shouldn't have to referee, but that's a WHOLE other subject and I don't know how to "help" you there because it involves knowing so much more about you and your family personally. Maybe we as a group can recommend some books that might help? or maybe you can find a local mom whom you can kind of pick her brain about how she does things.

I think getting the majority of things done in the morning definitely is a key for me. If we don't get things (like school!) done in the AM it's much harder to get it done. And getting up and showering first thing in the AM is also key for me too (and putting my tennis shoes on)

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Originally Posted by kaspears17 View Post
I don't have 4 kids yet, but will. my biggest struggle tho is getting my kids to get along. Especially the oldest (10). He is constantly yellling, belittling, talking down, or chastising the 2nd oldest (7) and refuses to respect the youngest's (2) space or desires. He thinks Ramses a doll, to be played with whenever he wants and gets very upset when Ramses doesn't want to play with him or hold him or give him hugs or whatever. He just doesn't understand yet that Ramses is his own person. With the new baby coming, I'll be a SAHM and dont' know how I'll referee that all the time.

I have to have a list too, (although my schedule's no where near as organized or pretty as MommyScott's) otherwise, I just lay around and do nothing, then feel bad. I find that if I get up early, immediately get dressed and attack my list wihtout sitting down first, while I have energy, I get a bunch more done. then if I"m laying around in the afternoon, I can remember what I did already and that helps me feel more motivated.
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Old 09-05-2008, 11:27 AM   #10
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Re: 4 or More Family Chat

My biggest issue right now is meals! The baby is almost 8 months and i would love for him to be able to eat what we eat. Anyone have any meals they would like to share with me?

Plus, with the start of school is the start of activities. I just don't have enough hours in the day! We are getting home from football/cheerleading abound 7:30-8 ish and then rushing to get baths in. Thankfully, with me being a SAHM, we are eating before. But our finances are starting to not look so good for winter so i may have to go back to work!

If I do go back to work, WOW, how will ANYTHING get done?!?!?!
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