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Old 09-10-2008, 09:00 AM   #1
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I need help with ds not sleeping! Help!!

I will first tell you what is going on. But I don't know what to do anymore. He is over 7 months and EBF. He cut his first tooth a few weeks ago. I started solids about a month ago and it seems to be going fine. He also started crawling very good a week ago.

Now on to the not sleeping. This is an average night for us. He gets a bath at 7:30 or so and then nurses. Most nights it takes about an hour to get him to sleep. Usually by 9. Then he is up by midnight, last night he was up twice by midnight. He just wants to nurse. Then he gets in bed with me since he won't go back in his crib. Once he is in bed with me it's no easier. He is up abotu every hour wanting to nurse. He does not nurse well lying down so I have to sit up and nurse him. This of course wakes me up more. His crib is in our room. I also had him checked out with his pedi and no ear infection, nothing. He is fine. Also, he takes about 2 naps only 30 min. each.

I am looking for any advice. I never believed in CIO but I am to my wits end and willing to try anything. The only thing is my husband will not let CIO happen, I know this. But he also sleeps in another room at night and gets plenty of sleep.

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Old 09-10-2008, 09:35 AM   #2
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Re: I need help with ds not sleeping! Help!!

I am having the same issue with my ds#3 I called a sleep trainer I was so desperate. She said he should go to bed no later then 7:00pm since my dh doesn't get home until then we decided 8:00.She said if a baby is overly tired he will wake more frequently. He may fuss a while but don't let him scream all night wait 5-10 minutes or however long you decide then go to him pat him shush him whatever but keep it brief (10-15 sec.)and do not pick him up, but let him know you are there and he is not alone then leave again. If fussing continues same thing, wait a few minutes and repeat. It sounds like a lot of work but it has helped. Also at his age he doesn't need to eat during the night it is a habit. Make sure his is fed well before you put him down maybe cereal or something. Just plain refuse to feed until a time you see fit or not at all. You have to break the habit if this is what you want. I do not feed until 3:00am and my ds is 5 1/2 months he still wakes before that and would eat if I let him but I just go through the steps as I have described and It only takes 1-2 times if that. I have noticed I am a lot more patient and rested. Sorry this is so long but it has helped me not fix the problem entirely but helped a lot it may take a while to get him used to the new routine but be patient there is hope. I don't know if this is what you want to do or not but if you have any questions PM. thanks I haope I have been a least some help.
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Old 09-10-2008, 10:33 AM   #3
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Re: I need help with ds not sleeping! Help!!

mama. You sound tired!!

The first thing I thought of when I read your message is your LO must be tired too! As pp said, when they get over-tired it actually can make night-time sleep worse instead of better. Have you tried more frequent naps during the day? Like laying down for quiet time (even if he doesn't sleep) every 2-3 hours or so?

Is there any caffeine in your diet that could be causing him to be restless at night?

Try the no-cry sleep solution book. Esp. since you are against CIO it may be helpful. The main thing is helping him find other sleep associations besides BFing so that he doesn't always need it to fall back asleep. Some other comfort measures to try are shushing, rocking, bouncing, music, white noise, a lovey/toy, massage, etc. It will definitely take longer than CIO but should be more pleasant for everyone..
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Old 09-10-2008, 10:52 AM   #4
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Re: I need help with ds not sleeping! Help!!

HUgs mama! I could have written your post a few months ago. DS was up all night wanting to nurse. I was so exhausted and hardly functioning. He to didn't nap well and I had to hold him for all his naps. I was against CIO, it feels so wrong. We did No cry sleep solution and it worked for a while, but we ended up doing CIO. It worked for us. DS still gets up a few times a night, but not nearly as often. I hated CIO, still not a fan. We also got him a love love, that took a long time as I was his lovey.
Good luck and I hope you all get some sleep soon!
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Old 09-10-2008, 12:00 PM   #5
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Re: I need help with ds not sleeping! Help!!

My son did not sleep well either. He still doesnt really nap, but I can deal with that. It was the staying up till 11, getting up at 1, and at 3 and at 6 and then up for the day at 7 that was killing me! I was exhausted! Sometimes he was up from 1-3! And then up again at 6. I was soooo anti CIO, so I just kept getting up and feeding him. But I felt myself getting almost angry inside that he wasn't sleeping and tha t made me feel TERRIBLE! The CIO actually happened by accident, but at the very best time it could have happened. I must have been really out because I didnt hear DS when he woke up at 1. The first time I heard him cry that night was at 6. I was so amazed that he slept for so long! I told my MIL about it the next day (I live w/ my in-laws) and she was like "no he didnt " She heard him cry at 1, but she didnt get up and bring him to me like she normally does if I dont here him. I was kind of mad at first, but then I realized that he had skipped his 2nd wake up after that, and he was happier that next day than he ever is. So obviously it didnt hurt him at all. He didnt hate me, he wasnt damaged. And she said he didnt cry long, less than 10 mins, and only off and on. So I decided from then on, I wasn't getting him at 1. This was about a week ago, and now he's not even crying in the night, he gets up at 5:30 at the earliest now and then goes back to sleep untill 8 or 9 after nursing.
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Old 09-10-2008, 02:18 PM   #6
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Re: I need help with ds not sleeping! Help!!

I am tired. I think my poor body is so used to only getting about 3 hours sleep a night. But it's still not good for me. The quiet time sounds good and I never thought of that. I will try this. Thanks!!!

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Originally Posted by takasmom View Post
mama. You sound tired!!

The first thing I thought of when I read your message is your LO must be tired too! As pp said, when they get over-tired it actually can make night-time sleep worse instead of better. Have you tried more frequent naps during the day? Like laying down for quiet time (even if he doesn't sleep) every 2-3 hours or so?

Is there any caffeine in your diet that could be causing him to be restless at night?

Try the no-cry sleep solution book. Esp. since you are against CIO it may be helpful. The main thing is helping him find other sleep associations besides BFing so that he doesn't always need it to fall back asleep. Some other comfort measures to try are shushing, rocking, bouncing, music, white noise, a lovey/toy, massage, etc. It will definitely take longer than CIO but should be more pleasant for everyone..
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Old 09-10-2008, 02:23 PM   #7
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Re: I need help with ds not sleeping! Help!!

This does not sound bad to me at all! The only issue I have is my husband. I actually mentioned doing a tiny bit of CIO and he freaked out! He works and I stay home but I need a break. I really do want to try a small amount of CIO to see if it helps at all. We'll just have to have a long talk about what's best for everyone.



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Originally Posted by Bethannp View Post
My son did not sleep well either. He still doesnt really nap, but I can deal with that. It was the staying up till 11, getting up at 1, and at 3 and at 6 and then up for the day at 7 that was killing me! I was exhausted! Sometimes he was up from 1-3! And then up again at 6. I was soooo anti CIO, so I just kept getting up and feeding him. But I felt myself getting almost angry inside that he wasn't sleeping and tha t made me feel TERRIBLE! The CIO actually happened by accident, but at the very best time it could have happened. I must have been really out because I didnt hear DS when he woke up at 1. The first time I heard him cry that night was at 6. I was so amazed that he slept for so long! I told my MIL about it the next day (I live w/ my in-laws) and she was like "no he didnt " She heard him cry at 1, but she didnt get up and bring him to me like she normally does if I dont here him. I was kind of mad at first, but then I realized that he had skipped his 2nd wake up after that, and he was happier that next day than he ever is. So obviously it didnt hurt him at all. He didnt hate me, he wasnt damaged. And she said he didnt cry long, less than 10 mins, and only off and on. So I decided from then on, I wasn't getting him at 1. This was about a week ago, and now he's not even crying in the night, he gets up at 5:30 at the earliest now and then goes back to sleep untill 8 or 9 after nursing.
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Old 09-10-2008, 03:18 PM   #8
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Re: I need help with ds not sleeping! Help!!

I am having the same issues. I borrow the no cry sleep solution from the library so far it is helping but we are only on day 3....
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Old 09-10-2008, 03:18 PM   #9
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Re: I need help with ds not sleeping! Help!!

I agree you both need to be on the same page when it comes to your babies. It takes a lot of support from your Dh cause no momma likes to hear her baby cry.When we know it is best it is still hard even at wits end we still want to fix it and when we can't it drives us crazy emotionally, But so does no sleep. Lots of hugs you can do it!!
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Old 09-10-2008, 05:23 PM   #10
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Re: I need help with ds not sleeping! Help!!

I've used CIO type methods as well. Sort of my own loose version of Ferber. I agree with all the other mamas. My DH and I discussed it first, but then we did "Ferberize." Our kids sleep great now. And I totally second babies being overtired. Not all, but most babies have a harder time falling asleep and staying asleep if they are overtired. I'd try moving the bedtime forward. Good luck.

ETA-here's a recent thread

http://www.diaperswappers.com/forum/...d.php?t=543378
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