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Old 10-20-2008, 10:32 AM   #1
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potty learning at night question

My son is 3 1/2 and he has been using the potty during the day pretty reliably for about 9 mos. to a year. At night he is not reliable at all. Some days he wakes up bone dry and other nights he floods his bed. He NEVER wakes to pee on his own and he will not wake up because he is wet. If he does wake to come to our bed- he will not tell me he has peed even if he is soaked. For example today, he came into my bed and was tossing and turning so I reached over to try to calm him by resting my hand on his tummy or back (usually works) and he was drenched from chest to knees. Never said a word! So I changed him into dry clothes and we all went back to sleep. (And I am washing all of the linens from both beds now!)

So- I have tried waking him before I go to bed and taking him to the toilet- he always pees, and this does help usually- but it doesn't guarantee he will wake up dry and it hasn't "trained" him to wake and pee on his own. He usually sleeps in an Imse Vimse trainer and wool longies which have been great for the past year or so. I just sold all the GAD's he used to wear at night because he had a long spell of doing great at night and I needed the money. But now he seems to have gone backwards. He pees almost every night and sometimes A LOT.

I was talking to my mom this morning and she said that she and 2 of her siblings wet the bed until they were in Elementary school. So- I believe there is a genetic component. My son does not wake when he has to pee, doesn't wake when he feels wet, the wet doesn't seem to bother him. I don't have a problem with him wetting himself at night, since I know he can't help it. I do not react at all- just calmly change him, the sheets, etc. And if he seems bothered by the fact that his sheets were wet I assure him that it's ok- the pee just came out when he was sleeping.

So- I think I have decided that we need to go to using sposie pull ups at night, so he stays dry and his bed stays dry. Now that the weather is colder here and we turn our heat WAY down at night, I don't want him sleeping in a cold wet bed. I don't think he is going to be happy with the change since he sees paper sposies as "diapers" (his baby cousin wears them.) But we'll have to work on that. Hopefully we'll find a way to convince him and keep him from feeling "humiliated" like my mom did.

I feel like I'm rambling- but I do actually have a question here! LOL I guess I have always felt that feeling wet was part of learning to get up a pee in the toilet. I wonder if putting a paper pull-up on him and not letting him feel wet will hinder him in the process of night training. I want to do everything I can to help him stay dry at night (in his own time) but I don't want to make him sleep in a urine soaked bed to do it. Argh. I guess I just don't know what to do.

Has anyone been through this? Are there any good books about night training? Or what to do with late night trainers? (I know he's not a late trainer at this point- just planning ahead.) I am really concerned about his feelings about all of this and want to keep things as positive as possible.

I'd appreciate advice, links, book recommendations, anything!
Thanks in advance.

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Old 10-20-2008, 12:49 PM   #2
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Re: potty learning at night question

No advice at all as I'm in the same boat! Hopefully someone else will have some ideas about this. I'm kind of hoping that it's just a matter of time till he can be dry consistently, but we're just not there yet.
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Old 10-20-2008, 12:56 PM   #3
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Re: potty learning at night question

Nothing we have tried has worked for our son who is 7. We have tried letting him "be wet" but it didn't make a difference. We tried waking him up every night at midnight to make him go potty, setting an alarm for later at night to make him wake up to go potty, withholding water after a certain time of night....All of these things made me feel like we were torturing him and nothing made a difference.
I think he will just have to grow out of it. Something in his system isn't mature enough yet to either make him hold it or wake him up. We are hoping it kicks in eventually. It must be fairly common though because none of his friends he's had sleepovers with seem to think its a big deal.

He is a heavy sleeper...even slept through our smoke detectors going off for 10 minutes once. Yikes.
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Old 10-20-2008, 01:42 PM   #4
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Re: potty learning at night question

So what does your 7 yr. old son sleep in at night?
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Old 10-20-2008, 03:36 PM   #5
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Re: potty learning at night question

I don't think you really train kids to go at night. I think it is generally just their bodies eventually get mature enough to wake them up or hold it. Some suggestions though in the meantime. Pocket trainers. Maybe you can find some in the FSOT area or buy 3 or 4. Enough to get you through 2-3 nights. If you don't want to go that route, try a cover for his bed that is fleece on top and absorbent underneath so that is draws the moisture away from him.
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Old 10-20-2008, 04:52 PM   #6
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Re: potty learning at night question

Yeah- well what irks me is that I searched high and low to find the right noght trainer and finally found GAD's which are wonderful trim pockets with lots of elastic for easy pull ups and I spent a lot of mney and bought 7 of them. He wore them for about 4 months then graduated to Imse Vimse's- since he was rarely peeing at night- then we went to undies! After about a month in undies I sold the GAD's because I needed the money.

Then we went on vacation this summer and he had to wear pull ups at night because we were camping for a week and I couldn't wash pee soaked clothes, sleeping bags, etc. every day. (After the second day of wet clothes/blankets at night I switched to Imse Vimse pull ups. After 2 more nights of peeing in those we went to sposies. I had so much stinky pee soaked laundry I spent 1/2 day of my vacation in a laundromat just to save us from having to smell it the rest of vacation!)

Anyway- when we got home we went back to Imse Vimses, but we never made it back to undies. And now he is peeing just about every night and ending up so wet at least twice a week that it leaks through the wool longies even!

So now I am sorry that I sold the GAD's but I cannot afford to replace them right now since I am not working. I have made boosters for the Imse Vimse's out of microfiber covered in fleece but they don't add much absorbency really. So I guess we will try the sposie pull ups while the weather is cold (so he stays warm and dry.) And if things get better and he starts peeing less, I will use the Imse Vimse's again.

Unless I get some other info telling me that is a terrible idea! LOL
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