Reply Hey Mom! Learn more about the Gerber Life Insurance Grow-Up Plan!
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 10-23-2008, 08:52 AM   #11
Registered Users
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 2,851
Re: temper temper temper

Originally Posted by megan1979 View Post
This is exactly how I handle tempertantrums as well. I think rocking and holding, IMO, just belittles them. If I'm angry about something and instead of listening someone tried to 'calm' me...I'd bite there head off! I think they learn more about self when they calm themselves down and the get rewarded (cuddled) for that, not for the tantrum itself.
How does offering comfort belittle a child? It is very possible to be empathetic and care about how a child feels, leading them to calm down. Just knowing someone cares about your feelings makes a HUGE difference in how we react.

I don't get how that is belittling. It doesn't seem disparaging at all.

And love isn't a reward. Why should it be?


Left DS because of lack of virus control.
LilyGrace is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-23-2008, 10:12 AM   #12
Beaker's Avatar
Registered Users
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Montana
Posts: 2,234
Re: temper temper temper

I recommend the book "happiest baby on the block" it really helped us!
Beaker is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-24-2008, 12:16 PM   #13
Bot Girl's Avatar
Bot Girl
Registered Users
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 3,151
My Mood:
Re: temper temper temper

I personally wouldn't put him in his crib - I wouldn't want him to associate bad feeling with his place of rest.

We have a time out rug in our home where DD can pitch her fit, then come talk to me when she's ready. I think kids just need some time to process things, and can't control their emotions yet.
Bot Girl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-24-2008, 02:17 PM   #14
luvsviola's Avatar
Registered Users
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Central Indiana
Posts: 17,103
My Mood:
Re: temper temper temper

(((HUGS))) DD is the same way right now. I just keep telling myself it is a phase.

I let her pitch her fit, and just walk away. It isn't fun when no one is watching.
Middle school teacher by day, super mom by night
Mommy to The Boss~2007, The Energizer Bunny~2009, and The Princess~2011
My kids are no longer in diapers, but somehow, my computer keeps finding its way back here...
luvsviola is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-25-2008, 03:56 PM   #15
clechatelier's Avatar
Registered Users
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: The sticks...Wendell, NC
Posts: 409
My Mood:
Re: temper temper temper

I'm not an experienced momma to offer advice, but DD (15 months) has terrible tempers too. Sometimes they start when I'm carrying her- she'll arch her back and I about drop her! At times she'll hit me in the face too. DH and I haven't quite decided what direction we're going to take with her discipline-wise, so I usually just let her wind down on her own without making a big fuss. She's never really hurt herself in the process. I'm 7 months preggo and it can be SUCH a strain, so I just leave the room for a minute to calm down when I'm really frazzled. Luckily these only happen when she's very frustrated from being hungry, tired, or needing a change.
Chelsea: Wife to my French beau and best friend Maman to our feisty daughter 2.5 years and our son 13 months
clechatelier is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-25-2008, 09:51 PM   #16
ttachuk's Avatar
Registered Users
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,527
My Mood:
Re: temper temper temper

We have massive tantrums here also- from both my 3.5 year old and my 18 month old. I expect my 3.5 year old to use her words rather than hitting and screaming, and we use time-outs (cool-downs) and removal of privilages for her.

For DS it is a totally different story- he doesn't have the words to express himself so we usually let him have his tantrum. I try to give him words. For example I will say "Owen is angry...Owen wants a cookie but Mommy says no". He seems to realize that I understand him and he calms down- sometimes. Otherwise I just ignore it and then comfort him when the storm passes.
Mom to Bump (6), Bud (4), and Dan Dan (1).
ttachuk is offline   Reply With Quote

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Copyright 2005 - 2018 VIX-WomensForum LLC. All Rights Reserved.