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Old 12-01-2008, 08:03 PM   #1
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How do you tell when a child is ready?

I'm curious what people think about this. A family friend is a teacher at a montessori school and she just told me that when a child can give you something (and not snatch it back right away) they are ready to PT/PL. DS does this, but it seems kinda weird to me as a sign of readiness though, since I don't see really how that is related.

DS is 16 mo, and lately he will be dry all morning (like from 7:30 when he wakes till 9:30 when I change him to go out), and I have offered him the potty and he'll go. Only standing, I might add. We tried EC a while ago, but he WILL NOT sit on the potty. Also, before bed he goes potty. I ask if he needs to go pee pee and he just goes, about 90% of the time. In general, he is not interested in the potty. He could care less when I go. He'll follow me in and play with his bath toys (or even his potty). He drives it around like a little car.

So how do you decide when your LO is ready? I don't want to force it too early, but I also think he would benefit from not being in diapers (even though I change him often he has a real sensitivity to wetness and it's causing irritation, plus he hates, hates, hates diaper changes). What are the signs you look for? TIA!

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Old 12-06-2008, 06:10 PM   #2
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Re: How do you tell when a child is ready?

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Originally Posted by 2007mama View Post
I'm curious what people think about this. A family friend is a teacher at a montessori school and she just told me that when a child can give you something (and not snatch it back right away) they are ready to PT/PL. DS does this, but it seems kinda weird to me as a sign of readiness though, since I don't see really how that is related.
If this is true then DD would have been ready at about 9 months old. Drats, that was 15 months ago so I must have missed my window of opportunity.

In all seriousness, I have no idea when to tell if a child is ready. I know DD isn't. She will sit on her potty sometimes, but it's just a novel chair to her. She doesn't know what to do on it. We talk about PLing every now and then but it's just talking to her. She's not capable of pulling pants up and down very easily yet (she can sometimes try to pull them up but in the back, they get stuck under her big cloth bootie, lol). She's not aware at all, that I can see, of when she pees and poops. Wet/dirty diapers don't bother her (they never have, even from birth). I just really don't know when or if she'll ever be ready. She'll probably need some XXXL diapers to take to high school with her.
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Old 12-16-2008, 12:04 AM   #3
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Re: How do you tell when a child is ready?

Ok, I am reading a couple of books on PTing-- Keys to Toilet Training by Zweiback and No-Cry Potty Training Solution by Elizabeth Pantley. Here's what they say are the signs of readiness:

- Your child stays dry for at least 2 hours at a time during the day
- You've noticed that your child is stopping briefly during play to urinate or have a BM. This tells you that your child is aware of the sensations that will become her signals that it is time to go.
- Your LO can understand and follow simple directions, and can tell you at times that he needs to be changed. He understands the meaning of wet, dry, clean, wash, sit and go.
- Your Lo is imitating lots of adult behavior, such as wanting to brush his teeth or use a fork. He can put his pants on and take them off
- Your LO is able to sit still on a small chair for 3-5 minutes while you read or talk to her.
- Your LO is not in one of the intense periods of negativity that come and go during the toddler years.
- Your LO is not afraid of a flushing toilet.

Pantley also says that PT-ing is a team effort, so you should make sure that everyone in your family is ready for PTing. For example, that your life is not going to be unusually stressful, no major vacations (or holidays!), drastic schedule changes, etc.
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Old 12-16-2008, 03:23 PM   #4
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Re: How do you tell when a child is ready?

I'm not sure what snatching/not snatching has anything to do with PLing? Maybe it's a maturity/age level thing? Just an average "these happen at around the same ages" kinda thing?
I agree it would be nice to have him PLed at such a young age! Mine showed signs early, but then took them back. Hopefully you can make him see how much nicer it is to be dry!!


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Originally Posted by Tweedledum View Post
Ok, I am reading a couple of books on PTing-- Keys to Toilet Training by Zweiback and No-Cry Potty Training Solution by Elizabeth Pantley. Here's what they say are the signs of readiness:

- Your child stays dry for at least 2 hours at a time during the day
- You've noticed that your child is stopping briefly during play to urinate or have a BM. This tells you that your child is aware of the sensations that will become her signals that it is time to go.
- Your LO can understand and follow simple directions, and can tell you at times that he needs to be changed. He understands the meaning of wet, dry, clean, wash, sit and go.
- Your Lo is imitating lots of adult behavior, such as wanting to brush his teeth or use a fork. He can put his pants on and take them off
- Your LO is able to sit still on a small chair for 3-5 minutes while you read or talk to her.
- Your LO is not in one of the intense periods of negativity that come and go during the toddler years.
- Your LO is not afraid of a flushing toilet.

Pantley also says that PT-ing is a team effort, so you should make sure that everyone in your family is ready for PTing. For example, that your life is not going to be unusually stressful, no major vacations (or holidays!), drastic schedule changes, etc.
My 28mo is doing all of those things except the staying dry for 2 hours. He will, but it's rare, only because he drinks more than any kids I've seen. He'll wake up dry in the morning. But yet, he still won't PL. He could not care less if he's wet. He'll sit in poo too. I've gone into his room, and can smell his poop, yet he's playing and doesn't care. I've put him in underwear, and he'll pee in them and guess what? Not care. Totally frustrating!
I'm getting really irritated changing his poopy diapers!
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