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Old 07-23-2006, 07:38 PM   #1
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Hitting! Please help.

My almost 15 month old has started getting "fresh" saying no and running away when I ask him to do something, give me something, etc. In the past few days he has accidentally hit me in the face twice and when I said ow and told him mama got hurt he just hauled off and hit me on purpose again (and if I said ow, don't hit, hitting hurts, gentle hands he would just do it again and again.) My once sweet, snuggly, smiley baby has turned into a toddler I hardly recognize!

Any advice?

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Old 07-24-2006, 01:22 AM   #2
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Re: Hitting! Please help.

I'm right there with you! I hope someone has something to help us! My dd says "shup up" as well as hitting and hiding and acting like a 2 year old on crack!

I've just been trying to solve the problem before she gets too angry, by letting her know I'm listening and using a lot of redirection. It doens't always work, especially naptime and bedtime. I usually want to jump off the balcony around both times!!! LOL
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Old 07-24-2006, 02:41 AM   #3
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Re: Hitting! Please help.

lol on the 2yr on crack..

im with you mamas...cadence is a VERY happy lil girl has hardly ever cried but shes been having some tantrums and shes like sooo hyper she knows shes not sposed to do suttin so she does it anyway.... if she hits me i tell her no cadence that hurts momm be niiiice and have her hand pet my face. and hug her. and redirection and being positive helps to..dont say no all the time say how about we try this instead..not no u cant do that.....everyone is like shes in her TERRIBLE twos and for some reason it ticks me off so i smile and say i prefer to call them teriffic...after all they are only this young once so we might as well just suck it up and enjoy every moment

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Old 07-24-2006, 02:55 AM   #4
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Re: Hitting! Please help.

Terrible two's is what people say when they have no idea how to deal with their child. My 6 y/o neice is apparently still going through it! LOL
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Old 07-24-2006, 03:07 AM   #5
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Re: Hitting! Please help.

yea i agree with that...i just let ppl say what they want....if my daughter is gonna throw a fit it has nothing to do with age...its just bc she is gonna go it.....and sometimes thats the only way to express themselves after all they cant speak too well...o well
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Old 07-24-2006, 09:22 AM   #6
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Re: Hitting! Please help.

Bruce is getting to be really bad about hitting. When he doesn't get his way he'll hit and sometimes he will hit for ( you think) no reason at all. I redirect him, I tell him to stop because it hurts, I tell him to be gentle but, so far nothing has helped. I when I'm working in the Pre-k room I tell the children to use their words and not their hands but, Bruce really doesn't have a lot of words yet to express himself. I'm hoping once he gets more he won't hit soo much.
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Old 07-24-2006, 11:33 AM   #7
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Re: Hitting! Please help.

My 2.5yo is getting better about this....but all I really do is just tell him no, we don't do that....you don't want to be hit and neither does anybody else...you have to be nice to people so they're nice to you....not REAL easy to explain to a toddler and even harder to one younger than that...so, no real advice, but I think it's pretty normal.

Even before he could understand (and I know he can understand it now), I'd tell him basically the same thing...no, that's not nice..we gotta be nice to people so they'll be nice to us, etc etc...and i'd hold his hand when he'd hit...not firmly at all, just touching his hand so that he'd pay attention to it and realize what he did...because a lot of the time he'd just kind of mindlessly do it and not pay attention after it happened...so it wasn't a disciplinary touch, but just touch sensation to get him to pay attention to his hand....if that makes any sense? LOL...I don't know if I'm explaining it right...ANYWAY....takes a long time to help them (or him, i assume it's normal..maybe not?) to learn things...just have to be consistant and repetitive.
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Old 07-24-2006, 12:08 PM   #8
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Re: Hitting! Please help.

When my dd hits and I tell her "Don't hit Mommy, hitting hurts. Use nice hands." She'll just laugh this real evil like laugh. Psycho kid. What do you do if they laugh at you? She also does this to my husband all the time and it drives him nuts!
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Old 07-26-2006, 09:08 PM   #9
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Re: Hitting! Please help.

I just wanted to give all you mamas some hope.

My DS started hitting around 14 mos old. It was REALLY bad! I actually had to leave a playgroup because he was so aggressive towards the other kids. He's now 3 and I just noticed that he hasn't been hitting lately. He seems to have outgrown the hitting.

So, be patient and hopefully your kids will outgrow it.
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Old 07-28-2006, 02:10 AM   #10
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Re: Hitting! Please help.

My dd went through this stage right around that age too & it was very frustrating. She still hits every once in awhile, but not all the time the way she was at the worst point.

We did 2 things that I believe helped. The first was immediate reaction/consequence. We started to use the word "naughty" and told her that we don't hit, hitting is naughty. That hurts mommy or whoever... And we'd hold her hand to prevent her from continuing to hit at the same time. We also made sure that she was eye to eye with us when we told her this. Then we would put her down on the floor off to the side of wherever she was. My dd didn't like this at all... just the abrupt interruption of whatever was going on and then being put on the floor, it didn't make her a happy camper...

The other thing we did, was watch for patterns for when the hitting would happen. Was she over-tired? Hungry? Bored? Trying to get our attention? And then we simply tried to prevent those situations from occurring so that she wouldn't be put in the position of lashing out from frustration.

I know dh had a lot harder time with the stage than I did, but it really helps to keep in mind that at this age toddlers just don't have the language to express their frustration or anger or whatever else might be going on. Now that dd is 2 when she starts to try and hit when she's mad I've started telling her that I understand she's angry and that she needs to tell me instead of hitting. It helps for us to identify for them how they're feeling so that they can learn to better express themselves...

Now when she does hit, she immediately starts to cry & wants to give kisses and hugs to say sorry... sometimes frustration just gets the best of her I think and then she knows she shouldn't have hit & feels bad.

I think I should also say that while we use the word "naughty," we never ever tell her that she's naughty. We always describe whatever the behavior is as naughty. And we don't overuse it either, it would probably lose it's impact if we did...

That's my anyways.
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