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Old 01-28-2009, 05:08 PM   #1
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5 Year Old with Behavior Issues...

Sorry to post this here, but I feel close to you guys And I'm pregnant and this situation sucks!!!


My son has always been really aggresive (even since birth!!) He is so incredibly sweet most of the time when he's at home with the occasional mishap. BUT at school he is a completely different child. He is disrespectful, wanting to play all the time, will not focus, and shuts down when teachers try to work with him on his schoolwork.

I am sooooo soooo fed up with it. He can be "good" when he wants to be. His teachers suggested it could be the baby on the way making him act this way, but he also did it last year in Pre-K. I wasn't pregnant then.

I am so afraid they are going to try to pull the ADHD crap on me. I totally don't believe in that. I have seen two of my friends children (one is 5 and one is 6) have to put on meds for ADHD or they couldn't be in the school anymore.

I have started omega 3 fish oil supplements as well as suntheanine once a day.

I am hoping to see some results with this.

I have also considered taking him to a therapist - maybe he can confide in him/her? I have no clue what to do. When he is with me - for the most part - he is a normal, functioning child.

Any ideas?

By the way. We have a fairly calm and stable household. I don't yell a lot (other than messy room issues and only after patiently waiting for them to be cleaned) He has his mom and dad and good relationships with both of us and our parents.

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Old 01-28-2009, 08:50 PM   #2
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Re: 5 Year Old with Behavior Issues...

What does he eat?

I ask because my sister's oldest DS was the exact same way at 5. She didn't want to go the ADHD route either, so she took out all simple sugars/unrefined carbs and switched to totally whole foods with lots of fruits, veggies, healthy fats and good proteins. Absolutely NO sugar/unrefined carbs were allowed in the house. Her DS was back to "normal" within two weeks.
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Old 01-28-2009, 08:54 PM   #3
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Re: 5 Year Old with Behavior Issues...

Is food sensitivity a possibility? Food colorings are notorious for causing behavior changes. I am sure there are others, too. I would look into that. Maybe take him to a naturopath, that way you can honestly tell them, "the doctor does not believe he is ADHD or needs to be medicated".
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Old 01-28-2009, 11:32 PM   #4
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Re: 5 Year Old with Behavior Issues...

There could be other issues impacting him in the classroom setting. You can always request an functional behavioral assessment. This is where they would look at all possible variables that could be accounting for his behaviors. They would look for patterns in his behaviors. Does he primarily have refusal during sit down work time or is it any time a request to do "anything" is made. They also should have a target behavior. Instead of just saying, "This is his entire collection of behaviors" it is best to focus on one to improve.

The plus side is that he is only having the behaviors in one setting. I am sure you wish it were that he had the challenging behaviors with you. When kids have challenging behaviors in both settings, you know it's a more significant problem.

If he does, however, have hyperactivity and distractibility that is apart from being young and a boy than fish oil may really help!! Fish oil helps regardless!

When you say you don't believe in "ADHD crap" what do you mean? Do you mean they shouldn't pull that "crap card" on you or do you completely don't believe in it? Just curious?

School districts can't truly legally tell a part to keep their child out of school until you get his or her medicated. They may try to say that or may really believe that but can't do that legally. That is a lawsuit waiting to happen
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Old 01-29-2009, 10:04 AM   #5
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Re: 5 Year Old with Behavior Issues...

No - I don't believe it is an issue with mine. Because I know he can listen and behave - just when he feels like it. I know it is strictly behavior and not an underlying issue. I think our school system pushes the parents to get their children diagnosed with this so they can stick them on medicine. I believe some children/adults do truley have it but Im not going that route with mine.

He already has a "behavior specialist" in his classroom that works with him and several other children. She is wonderful. But some days he is just "perfect" and some days off the meter with bad behavior. Not only that, but he is getting behind in school work. I then have to come home and spend hours with my children because they aren't "getting it" in the classroom.

I just keep praying that this issue will resolve itself. I am going to continue with the fish oil - I use it also. I also use suntheanine with him. I haven't seen that it makes a difference but persistence is key I suppose. A lot of people say that it's because of the baby, but why did he do this last year before there was even news of the baby? He gets all the attention he needs from us (mom and dad). I am going to eliminate all things with artificial colors and see if that makes a difference. I had honestly not thought of that.

Thanks guys
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Old 01-30-2009, 08:11 AM   #6
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Re: 5 Year Old with Behavior Issues...

I went through my cabinets last night and it's crazy how much artificial colorings are in the food we eat! EVEN IN PICKLES! CRAZY! I went through it and anything that wasn't opened I gave to the food bank. I hate for someone else to eat it, but if you truly are in need I suppose it is better than nothing...I hated to throw it all out - it was a lot - I just didn't want it in my house. From now on I am SO reading the labels on everything I buy. I will just have to go grocery shopping on my own now because I'm sure it will take longer.

Thanks!

I'm still open to more suggestions by the way
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Old 01-30-2009, 08:30 AM   #7
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Re: 5 Year Old with Behavior Issues...

Try looking up ODD my son has it and it sounds like what your son is experiancing.
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Old 01-30-2009, 08:33 AM   #8
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Re: 5 Year Old with Behavior Issues...

i just want to say alot of people blamed my sons ODD with the new baby too. I could very well be with your son but if you have noticed this before then maybe its not. if you really feel its not normal 5 yo boy behavior which if it were i'm sure you wouldn't be too worried....then see if the symptoms of Oppositional Defiant Disorder fit your son.
also there are no meds if your son is diagnosed with ODD just behavior modification and change of parenting style (which is super super hard)
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Old 01-30-2009, 08:38 AM   #9
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Re: 5 Year Old with Behavior Issues...

Quote:
Originally Posted by CarrieMeredith View Post
What does he eat?

I ask because my sister's oldest DS was the exact same way at 5. She didn't want to go the ADHD route either, so she took out all simple sugars/unrefined carbs and switched to totally whole foods with lots of fruits, veggies, healthy fats and good proteins. Absolutely NO sugar/unrefined carbs were allowed in the house. Her DS was back to "normal" within two weeks.
i am so glad u posted this - think we need to go this route. We are having very similar troubles and i'd agree that with my DS i think it is being 5 combined with the foods we eat. We are awaiting testing in different areas, but i'd just like to know. We think that we eat healthy, but not allowing the foods in the house is such a great idea. I'd love to know more resources on this if anyone can post. Coming up with recipes is hard! LOL And what do u give for snacks?? Having the time to prepare things is difficult! Anyone with kid low-carb snack suggestions? I can think of peanut butter on celery.

Id really like to work toward this angle but DH has to have his sweets. Im sure he could have them in the evenings after the LOs go to bed.

Quote:
Originally Posted by justjacqueline View Post
I went through my cabinets last night and it's crazy how much artificial colorings are in the food we eat! EVEN IN PICKLES! CRAZY! I went through it and anything that wasn't opened I gave to the food bank. I hate for someone else to eat it, but if you truly are in need I suppose it is better than nothing...I hated to throw it all out - it was a lot - I just didn't want it in my house. From now on I am SO reading the labels on everything I buy. I will just have to go grocery shopping on my own now because I'm sure it will take longer.

Thanks!

I'm still open to more suggestions by the way
Actually, i think it will be a lot faster. If u truly are going to prepare everythign whole/from scratch, really all u need are fruits/veggies and lean meats (chicken, fish?) Basic grains like brown rice, whole wheat flour.

U dont have to sit and compare cereal prices and cut coupons really because all the coupons I see these days are for pillsbury & campbells, etc.
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Old 01-30-2009, 10:11 AM   #10
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Re: 5 Year Old with Behavior Issues...

Healthy snack ideas: applesauce, cheese sticks, edamame (you can buy frozen packages of this at our local grocery, and they just require heating for two minutes in the microwave to be ready), fresh fruit, yogurt (you can make plain yogurt yourself at home and add fruit, in order to avoid any additives).
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